At some point this week, Suzzie must have challenged us all to write something to do with love. I had a go, and didn't like it. I sniffed about it, trying to improve it, and liked the 'improvements' even less. The only parts that worked for me was the first and last verse. Any advice?
Every morning I see
her
Big beige overcoat
A bag, and hat
I know her shape and
form
I know her chat
She greets me
politely
On her way to her
date
It's the same place
every morning
And she is never
late.
In her bag, a wrap of
chocolate
Of the diabetic kind
He won't say thank
you
But she doesn't mind.
Will he know her
today?
"It's hard to
say."
Sometimes he talks to
her
In quite a normal
way.
They take good care
of him, you know
At first she had her
doubts
But her strength was
was all spent out
And so she let him
go.
Maybe habit shaped
their framework
Commonsense sieves
out romance
But be it duty or
affection
It's love's final,
touching dance.
(It's about an woman who visits her husband every day in an old people's home.)