| One Liners The best collection to make your stomach pain while laughing |
| � Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Sonu : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook. � Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked. � Q: A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A: A small child replied: "They couldn't get a baby-sitter". � Santa, "Doctor, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail". The vet stepped back, "Santa, why should I do such a terrible thing? "Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome.". � Q: Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? A: For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. � Q: What's the difference between a marriage and a mental hospital? A: At a mental hospital you have to show improvement to get out. � We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up!. � Did you hear about the scientist who crossed a carrier pigeon with a woodpecker? He got a bird that not only delivers messages to their destination, but knocks on the door when it gets there. � By the time Martin arrived at the football game, the first quarter was almost over. "Why are you so late?" his friend asked. "I had to toss a coin to decide between going to church and coming to the game." "How long could that have taken you?" "Well, I had to toss it 14 times.". � Did you hear about the X-ray specialist who married one of his patients? Everybody wondered what he saw in her. |
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