s . l . s . b . --- today

300102, 1725hr, central time.

a reader chris [*waves hi*] sent me an email re: my sex or no sex entry, and talked about what he thought, which was wonderful, i love it when people get something out of what i write, and actually feel inspired enough to drop me a mail to share their thoughts.

chris has an analogy of what marriage is: [hope you don't mind me pulling a quote!]

"marriage is two boxers shaking hands at the start of the bout, agreeing to the rules of fair play, the referee the community seeing that the fight is conducted according to the agreed upon rules, divorce the awarding of points and signifying that the fight is over and all will continue as it had before. I guess that would make cohabitation the sparring practice during training, looking for strengths and weaknesses."

i think he's right! i think cohabitation is a form of "sparring practice", this analogy brings such fascinating images into my head, i really like it.

it's hardly a secret that i'm in some kind of cohabitation arrangement with alvin right now. coincidentally we were housemates before we got together, and things just turned out this way, we didn't mean to live together. [he's still kinda traditional, it seems quite awkward for him, to acknowledge this arrangement.] sometimes i sleep in his bed, sometimes i don't. i believe in premarital sex, but i cannot quite say alvin's the man i want for the rest of my life, that's quite a big judgment to make right now, our relationship being so young, uncertain and all. so no, the fascinating part of our "cohabitation" isn't the sex. it's everything else.

it's waking up in the morning together and have him whimper a little, all wrapped up in his blanket because he doesn't want to get up. smelling his hair right after he comes out of the shower. getting used to his ocassional snoring. discovering his passion for horlicks as a midnight snack drink. realising he's actually rather vain, even at home. feeling a strange bone in his shoulder. the little stuff.

stuff like that - that's what alvin and i have right now, which i don't know if the usual couple has. it's the little things that count, the little things that make you wonder if your love for him can withstand the constant grinding of his irritating habits, his ridiculous beliefs, his obnoxious attitudes. [all of which i shall not list or specify here, to protect the innocent. haha.] really, indeed, it's the "sparring practice" that tells you if you're gonna win. both of you.

yesterday, after i finally got home after a long long day [which i shall not whine about, i shall not,] i was going to start on my homework, but i had to talk to alvin first - i hadn't seen him the whole day. he was really excited to see me, really eager to tell me how his day was - because he's in this optical communications class that he really likes, taught by a professor he really admires, and though the material is difficult, the lecture yesterday was apparently quite ok, and very exciting to him. so there i was, preparing myself my very late dinner, while he prepares his snack, and he was just going on and on about how funny the professor is, and how the field of optical communications is really exciting and different from everything else, and how the equipment they used in the lab are the best around, blah blah blah. i love alvin's passion for knowledge, i love it when he raves about something like that. [i believe the last time i talked about him raving on and on about a topic, he was talking about liverpool. heh.] i was physically and mentally exhausted last night, i couldn't really absorb whatever it was that alvin was saying, but i made little comments here and there. we were in the kitchen.

after that, sidat stepped out of the bathroom, right next to the kitchen, came to us, and he said, "eh, cindy you're like housewife already huh."

*bish*

what?!

what he meant, was that my conversation with alvin [or rather, alvin's conversation with me and the air around me,] reminded him of his father's conversation with his mother when he comes home after work, raving or ranting about something work-related. apparently alvin and i reminded sidat of a married couple.

hmm.

marriage is in my mind only because there're people like sidat who threw the idea in there. [the other culprit is poachie, who teased that i was saving for getting married, when i memtioned that i'm trying to save more money.] but no, i'm not really seriously thinking about it. after all, how seriously can i possibly think about it, at this point of time? but still, i ponder. it continues to amaze me, that one year ago, no, even just half a year ago, i wouldn't be able to imagine all these. i wouldn't be able to imagine waking up every morning to a smile like that. i wouldn't be able to imagine going to bed knowing someone will be there to hold me.

i wonder how lucky i am to be where i am right now. it's the little things, i say.

s . l . s . b .
[ stuff . . . ] feeling: perky food: honey chick[en] wrap - hmm did it really taste funny, or was it me? CD: show: kate and leopold reading: Global governnance surfin': agnes has a blog now! looking forward: chinese new year goodness: some random woman complemented my bag. hahahaha. she wanted to know where i got it from - and was very disappointed to know it was from singapore. [i remember the many times people asked me where i got my shoes too. people from singapore asked about my shoes from the states, people from the states asked about my shoes from...canada actually. haha. it's all so strange!] sensei watch: sensei won't be here from class tomorrow and friday! so sad. he's going for an interview in san fran. i hope he gets the job, so he can move there, it's a beautiful city, i always liked san fran. i want him to have the best!
[ say . . . ] 300102, 1725hr, central time. a reader chris [waves hi] sent me an email re: my sex or no sex entry, and talked about what he thought, which was wonderful, i love it when people get something out of what i write, and actually feel inspired enough to drop me a mail to share their thoughts. chris has an analogy of what marriage is: [hope you don't mind me pulling a quote!] "marriage is two boxers shaking hands at the start of the bout, agreeing to the rules of fair play, the referee the community seeing that the fight is conducted according to the agreed upon rules, divorce the awarding of points and signifying that the fight is over and all will continue as it had before. I guess that would make cohabitation the sparring practice during training, looking for strengths and weaknesses." i think he's right! i think cohabitation is a form of "sparring practice", this analogy brings such fascinating images into my head, i really like it. it's hardly a secret that i'm in some kind of cohabitation arrangement with alvin right now. coincidentally we were housemates before we got together, and things just turned out this way, we didn't mean to live together. [he's still kinda traditional, it seems quite awkward for him, to acknowledge this arrangement.] sometimes i sleep in his bed, sometimes i don't. i believe in premarital sex, but i cannot quite say alvin's the man i want for the rest of my life, that's quite a big judgment to make right now, our relationship being so young, uncertain and all. so no, the fascinating part of our "cohabitation" isn't the sex. it's everything else. it's waking up in the morning together and have him whimper a little, all wrapped up in his blanket because he doesn't want to get up. smelling his hair right after he comes out of the shower. getting used to his ocassional snoring. discovering his passion for horlicks as a midnight snack drink. realising he's actually rather vain, even at home. feeling a strange bone in his shoulder. the little stuff. stuff like that - that's what alvin and i have right now, which i don't know if the usual couple has. it's the little things that count, the little things that make you wonder if your love for him can withstand the constant grinding of his irritating habits, his ridiculous beliefs, his obnoxious attitudes. [all of which i shall not list or specify here, to protect the innocent. haha.] really, indeed, it's the "sparring practice" that tells you if you're gonna win. both of you. yesterday, after i finally got home after a long long day [which i shall not whine about, i shall not,] i was going to start on my homework, but i had to talk to alvin first - i hadn't seen him the whole day. he was really excited to see me, really eager to tell me how his day was - because he's in this optical communications class that he really likes, taught by a professor he really admires, and though the material is difficult, the lecture yesterday was apparently quite ok, and very exciting to him. so there i was, preparing myself my very late dinner, while he prepares his snack, and he was just going on and on about how funny the professor is, and how the field of optical communications is really exciting and different from everything else, and how the equipment they used in the lab are the best around, blah blah blah. i love alvin's passion for knowledge, i love it when he raves about something like that. [i believe the last time i talked about him raving on and on about a topic, he was talking about liverpool. heh.] i was physically and mentally exhausted last night, i couldn't really absorb whatever it was that alvin was saying, but i made little comments here and there. we were in the kitchen. after that, sidat stepped out of the bathroom, right next to the kitchen, came to us, and he said, "eh, cindy you're like housewife already huh." bish what?! what he meant, was that my conversation with alvin [or rather, alvin's conversation with me and the air around me,] reminded him of his father's conversation with his mother when he comes home after work, raving or ranting about something work-related. apparently alvin and i reminded sidat of a married couple. hmm. marriage is in my mind only because there're people like sidat who threw the idea in there. [the other culprit is poachie, who teased that i was saving for getting married, when i memtioned that i'm trying to save more money.] but no, i'm not really seriously thinking about it. after all, how seriously can i possibly think about it, at this point of time? but still, i ponder. it continues to amaze me, that one year ago, no, even just half a year ago, i wouldn't be able to imagine all these. i wouldn't be able to imagine waking up every morning to a smile like that. i wouldn't be able to imagine going to bed knowing someone will be there to hold me. i wonder how lucky i am to be where i am right now. it's the little things, i say.
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