290701, 1750hr, Singapore time.

leaving the office on friday was tough. first of all, i've really settled in quite well in my cubicle. i had CDs there, books, shoes, even my swimming stuff [y'know, cos i go swimming after work.] pack pack pack. and plus, i was still doing that darn museum paper. when it was finally done, it was 8 pages long. my boss appeared quite surprised i managed to pull it off. haha.

it felt good, when he shook my hand, and said, "hey, thanks for all your help, you did a lot for us." aaahh...feels good. though actually i don't think i really did that much. though i didn't think he really knew what i did. [after all, he's often not in, and most of what i do is for all the other colleagues in the office.]

anyhow, that's something that's already behind me. i'll miss going to that office, somehow. oh well.

i still feel like crap most of the time these days. maybe because he's not around, though i doubt it. it's more like a physical malaise - dizziness, headaches, stuffed up feeling in the chest. things like that. gasp. there's something in my head! not my brain, you stupid. or maybe i'm pregnant, but that's even more impossible. hahaha. all i'm saying is, i've been feeling ill for far too long...i thought it was the stress of rushing that report in the office, but now that i'm not working anymore, i still feel pretty crappy. and it's affecting my appetite, so that sucks.

yesterday, the uiuc ssa had this gathering, where we meet the freshies going there this year. to the hugest surprise in my life, i saw an old friend - let's call him C - there. man, he's so sweet [he brought me food when he found out i hadn't eaten], so fun to talk to. he's going to uiuc for an exchange program. he's the only one i really talked to throughout the gathering. i tried to talk to two girls, both from hwachong, one of whom is the prom queen for their year. she appeared quite uninterested to talk to me though, so i didn't bother with her anymore. and i felt quite rejected, sniff. C offered to dao [dao: singlish for snubbing someone] her for me. haha, isn't he sweet? though i doubt he'll be able to do it. that girl's after all the prom queen. she has the license to dao people, i guess. yeah, right. *meow* catty me today. hahaha...

anyhow, cos my appetite wasn't there, my mood, my energy all wasn't quite there, the gathering was barely fun. hmm. i should probably have stayed home.

and after i got home, desperate as i was to go to bed, my brothers and my mom made me play mahjong with them again. this time, i didn't lose, but i didn't win either. but i got totally drained, by the time i got to bed, at 4am. sigh. i need to find a husband who can play mahjong, so he can continue this family tradition, and i can get my sleep.

i feel quite terrible, anyhow. the only nice thing happening today, and recently, is getting to see agnes later. i miss her.