The Two Month Itch
The other day a female friend and I were talking and some how we got on the topic of masterbation. I asked her if she had ever masterbated, and without a twitch she replied with a "No". Well, of course she asked me the same question, and I responded with a firm "Hell, yea!" To keep her from thinking I might have some mental disorder I told her how I only do it once every week or two, not 10 times a day. Since I'm currently not having any sex this is enough to keep me from going on an insane killing spree.
Yea, I masterbate. So what.
Now that I've told you this abrieviated version of my masterbation conversation I want to know what is so wrong with masterbation? Isn't it just natural?
Personally I don't understand why such a natural act has become so tabue. I have heard both the pro and anti masterbation arguements and only the pro masterbation side has supported their reasoning well.
The main reasons I get from those who are anti-masterbation is that it is a discusting act or that to man handle ones self is religiously sinful. Bullshit.
How can "jerking off" be discusting or sinful but when it is done by your girlfriend or when she gives you a blow job it's okay. The reasoning behind anti-masterbation is hypocritical and just plain WEAK. Can someone tell me why the bible considers it to be so wrong.
Where is the exact passage in the bible where it says "Thou shall not jerk ones self off." Last I checked there wasn't one.
Now for the pro-masterbation side of this issue. These so called "evil satin worshipers" who know that "choking their chicken" is a good thing, argue that masterbation not only reduces stress and anxiety but is easily the safest sex a person can have outside of abstinence.
This isn't rocket science people.
Think about it. Do you really think there would be so much violence and rape if people just let loose on their big johnson every time they felt any violence coming on. For those of us who "rub our rods", we know that after we're finished we're about as harmless as a baby. Come on, we all know how we are after releasing during sex. All we want to do is role over and sleep. Same thing here, it's just by ourselves and easier on the wallet.
For the ladies reading this, there is a big upside for having men masterbate. Not only has science proven, but I can back up and verify from personal experience. If a man "jacks off" in a way similar to having sex it actually increases his stamina. So the more he does it the better for you. Hell, he might even satisfy you once in a while ladies.
As far as you Christians out there who feel the need to say if I "rub one off" then I'm sining, Fuck You. I have friends who won't even listen to music with refrences to masterbation (of course these friends love any song incouraging gang violence and murder, go figure). As far as I can tell I'm not only practicing the safest sex known, outside of abstinence, but I'm making myself less prone to rape or violence. Which to me sounds more like a saintly thing, not a sin.
I like the sound of that, "Saint Bastard".
I've now said my two sense on the subject and I want to know what you think. Are you pro or anti-masterbation? Why? Be specific.
I'm curious, could masterbating with both my left and right hand at the same time be considered an orgy?
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