..::PoeM::..
Dont cry for me if i ever go away
Because sad souls can never stay
on this earth, they wish they were never here
Because life has been torture these last years
Don't cry for me, if I seem lonely or sad
Because being alive has driven me mad
I'll say goodbye, and bid you farewell
I'm escaping this life, that's lonely as hell
I hear that place is good in the summer
Why did she leave? do you ever wonder...
Don't cry for me if I ever go away - Suicide note...someday
..::Tortured Soul::..
I can't stand it, I won't take this anymore
You can fuck this life, cuz I'm walking out the door
I'll close it on everybody I've ever known
I'm dead now, you hear? dont even call me on the phone
I've been through some shit, a dream that'll never die
I said I was happy, but hey, I can lie
The days pass by, the hell won't ever quit
"life is a dream we've never awakened from"-Can't you see it?
You only see a little girl, hopeless, innocent and sweet
You don't know that inside is a tortured soul, n the battle of my life already came to a defeat
Oh well..now I'm just doing this poem, taking up my time
If i could really express my feelings on paper, hell and heaven wouldnt rhyme
You're watching me, surprized that little girl could say words
Well I'm not who you think I am, so don't put your judgements first
Here I am, pretending everything's ay-okay
Still waiting for the heavens to come take me away
Let me just end this now: that sweet memories pass me by
But the happiest day of my life is the day that I die
::my tortured soul::
..::Love::..
I'm always nervous, you know I am
You can see it in my eyes
There's something that I can't get out
I wanna say, but I never try
Something's bothering me
It hurts deep down my soul
You know that it's a matter of time
Before I lose my self control
I want to tell you everytying
Cuz it's torture, can't you see?
About the future, about the past
And everything that's just me
But untill then, let me just say this
Because to you I'll never lie
I'm yours forever, and even more
Our love will never die
..::To You::..
As I look into your eyes
The little devil that's in you
I can remember all thoes lies
And the hell you put me through
You say it's okay
Tell me to smile and laugh
You just dont know that
I can't escape the past
So I'm moving on
I don't see you by my side
Being this free woman
Makes me feel so alive
::dont cry::
life is short
love is sweet
death is what you can never defeat
breakups are hard
but we all carry on
the world can never get along
god is there
looking down from above
sin, what the devil
will only love
we may laugh
we my cry
but let's face it
we're all gonna die
..::meh..short but to the point!::..
..::Fallen Angel::..
How does it feel
to be free to fly?
so spread your wings
and prepare to die...
you're a fallen angel
down from up above
cursed by the darkness of the earth
but still shining down your love
so spread your wings
n' fly to where u wanna be
though the right choice is urs
love will be your destiny
...ANOTHER...
black wings, dark soul
this angel sought to gain control
never knew that love will prevail
won't break through any male, any female
this angel, all he was looking for was a little love
but hid from the light shining up above
couldn't face the truth, wouldn't let the light shine in
it only took some time for the love to begin
the white angel passed by, and as they found eachother's eyes
now in hope he begin to realize
life isn't about loneliness, anger, or sin
life si about love that only comes deep within
everyone needs someone to love, someone 2 care
so go out, spread the word, cuz love love can be only shared
..::Baby I Love You::..
Love me, n' I'll love you
no one can break the bond of two
I'll be yours forevermore
Ur lovely smile that I adore
the way you make me happy when I'm down
you make the whole world upside down
If u only love me, I'll love you 'til the end
do you beleive me when i say we're just friends?
BABY I LOVE YOU!!
--to the one whose supposed to suspect it this time!--
..::Black Roze::..
Burn Roses Burn
Light the red fire, and shed your tears
You've brought your reign of terror
after all these years
Your thorns sting and pierce my heart
You've torn me and my only love apart
My tears fall as i wipe them away
I wept and cried,"Why couldn't you just let love stay?"
I thought and dreamt of times we were together
And I thought that it could only last forever
All I needed was some time to think things through
What I found was that time only made love grew
But you came and took what could've been
Stopped the light in my life that was shining in
So die, and wilt, and waste away
Cuz I can't stand to live another day
THe next time you appear be sure to hear me still
I will crush your soul and spirit, so be it my will
Nov. 3
..::A Spurge of Love (that came out one day)::..
i need to know
need to know how you truly feel
need you to tell me someting real
tell me what u think about just the two of us
tell me that it cant be just lust
tell me that ur love is deep
tell me what you dream when u sleep
tell me what goes through ur head
i need to know what u felt when u bled
ur the only one who can fill me up
to do ur funny handshake and say "wasap"
i'll miss u tonight and i'll miss you tomorrow
so please releive me of my pain and sorrow
i want to tell you now that my love for you is true
but untill then i'll say it once more..
I miss you
..::NoV 27::..
4:37 pm Nov. 30
..::Please Tell Me::..
If there's a God
Y dont u show urself
prove me that ur real
If there is a God
then y do we
lie and cheat and steal?
If there are angels
then y am i not protected
from the dangers in this world?
If there are angels
then y do i get hurt
just cuz i'm a girl?
If there is true love
then y does my heart
ache so frickin' bad?
if there is true love
then i should've realized
that you're the best i'd had
If you're the one for me
then y do i have to wait
for u to tell me that it's true?
If you're the one for me
then y do i daze off
and lose myself thinking about you
please tell me this is real
could this be all it seems?
tell me this is real
and that ur not just a dream...
12/10/03
if i die, then i die
what would it matter to you?
if i cry, then i cry
why would it affect you?
if i'm hurt, then i'm hurt
what more can u do
if u try, i'd be the one
to end up hurting you
i've been broken and hurt,
torn apart inside
now that there's nothing left
i've got nothing else to hide
my soul and spirit's been tortured
even if u didnt realize
no emotions left, only dry tears
you're just nothing in my eyes
this will only last forever
time will be no use for u to stay
no cure or any remedy
nothing to take the pain away
no matter how hard u try
today will be too late to save me
forget my very being, that for a while i was here
and that the hint of love in ur heart
just wasnt meant for me...
12/11/03 10:52 pm
Empty Emotions
I tried to be sad
I just cried
I tried to walk away
I did in my mind
I tried to tell u my feelings
I just lied
I tried to be happy
I just smiled
I stood there feeling empty
for a while
I tried to be angry
I just punched the wall
I tried to showmy love
I didn't give u my all
I did what i was supposed to do
with no feelings inside
I only felt something missing
I wasn't even alive
I knew love wasn't true
thought I tried to believe
the empty emotions only came back
once you started to leave...
12/30/03 4:45 pm home from C.I ::A love Poem:: (edited may 21, 2004)
I will love you with all my strength,
with all my soul,
and with all my mind
None can break the love, not all the sin combined
Only you do I desire most
To take control of me and make you my mind's host
Everyday and every night you are there with me
and in the worst times you show up unexpectedly
There's no one else, I can't live without you
I'll give my all, cuz for u there ain't nothing I won't do
U were always there, to show the love u had told
And one day will come, you'll take me to your stronghold
(hehe.. fooled u thinkin' it was for some guy. although.. i think i do love.. another.. guy. *sigh*. well bak to tha poem)
God, you've sent me an angel from above
You've shown me that fallen ones could still love
I wanna thank you for all the joy you've given me
There's not a love than urs I would take so seriously
Jesus, you've struck me in the heart
There's no sin or temptation that could tear us apart
That day when I saw footprints in the sand
We were walking the rocky road of life together, hand in hand
You are my savior, no one else will ever do
I'll pray that this love will never break through
::life..:: April 22, 2004
how much of it..
do we have to endure
before we drop to our knees
in ways of finding a cure
life..
how much of it..
will rot away our souls
searching in the darkness
finding nothing but cold
life..
when will we find..
the meaning of our own
whats the use of having something
that makes us cry in bed and moan
life..
when will we find..
what we're meant to be here for
will that be the end..
and nothing more...?
life..
who can explain..
the joys and sorrows of it all
are we placed on this earth
because of someone's call?
life..
who can explain..
that it's not always pain and sadness
that there's something to live for
that someone could fill our emptiness
life..
no one can tell
when our time will come
when we'll find our true love
and know that he's the one
life..
no one can tell
that the end is really near
but will we know we've lost it all
when we realize it's finally here?
life..
it's all mystery, it's all emotion
even if it hurts u, n u think u've lost the fight
keep going, it's not over yet
someday will come when u'll see the light
cuz this is what life is like..
how do i go on.. wit da thought of losin u..
y does it linger in my head.. after all da times we've been through?
every moment im wit u.. i feel so blessed..
u gave me back my lost happiness...
but wen i see u hurt.. i try to hide my eyes..
cuz i dont want u to see how much im hurtin inside..
after havin u.. i never wanna let u go..
but how long ull stay on this earth? only God can know..
I pray for u.. every day and night..
i dont even care for my own shitty life..
i want us.. to just be together...
n i noe you beleive that i'll love you forever..
no one wants us to be together.. n God is givin me doubts..
but i wont lose u.. ur the only one i cant live without..
well, we can face this together, cant we?
once we turn 18, we'll be free ^_^
So fuck everyone else.. n dont care what they think
they cant keep us apart.. from what our love brings..
(yea dat last part was corny LoL..)
- 7/19/04 9:48 am -
(found this just now lol =D)
..::Don't Leave Me::..
From Sherry-Lyn to James
11/25/05 4:40 pm Friday
I thought i had it all
i was so in love with you
"cater to you" went thru my head most days
cuz my love for u was true
How could this be
that this was all a fake?
and knowing this reality
it's too much for me to take
Could we be together again someday?
could u love me once again
i dont want ur words to me
be just for another friend
This emptiness and pain hurts endlessly
even if it is just a couple of days
and even tho u did this once
u hurt me in more than just one way
I guess i deserved this
from what i did to my last
but you were real, and i wont move on
i dont want u to be my past
Is she good to you?
is she really better than me?
she'll never love you like i do
cuz my heart was yours first, truly
You already know you hurt me
but i dont care what u did
listen to what i want, listen to my words
cuz without u i cant live
Even if your whole heart isn't mine
i know someday it will be
so please dont end what we have now
dont make this into reality
I love you so much
"more than words can say"
if not today, if not tonight
i'll be waiting everyday
I hope you realize what you had
and i'll keep praying every night
that you'll come back to me now
cuz i need you in my life
I love you, please remember that
:: Love Freestyle ::
its hard to see both sides
to understand everything about love
both this "love that makes you blind"
and "flaws that ill see past cuz i love u"
you'll be hurt both ways
to a person new to love, u cant get it right away
ull be the smartest person on earth
and still wont ever get it
until u've been there n done it
so this is what i say
love is meaningless, if u think its true
if you've never had ur heart broken
u wont noe the full extent of love
because love is both a wonderful thing
and the painfulest thing ever
its the same as getting to noe
the true beauty of this world
you'll never experience it all
without falling down into complete darkness
love, like a rose
only blooms after its journey
through the darkness of the earth
12-26-05 12:26 am
"Love – The Chemical Reaction"
3/02/06
The clock is ticking
Ticking on the watch that’s his
Each second gets closer
‘Til I see the face I missed
I lay my head down
Feel the warmth of his hat
It smells just like his rocker hair
I know I can’t get enough of that
I can’t see what I’m doing
So blinded by this feeling
I’m so happy, but too restless
Man I feel like leaving
This nonsense took me over
I’m having endless thoughts of him
But I can’t fight or resist it
I just have to let it win
The drug of life can make this stop
But what on earth could stop me now?
I found out that love is fake
And reality showed me how
‘Cuz I know that love ain’t diamonds
It eventually fades away
So I’ll soak up the hazy moment
Until today becomes the day
..::Lullaby::..
4-20-06
now i lay me down to sleep
i close my eyes so tight to keep
the tears from escaping this poor soul
and manage for now to stay controlled
i try to ignore the blessing of pain
that dwells deep down but slowly gains
pretending that it isn't there
i lay and wait for me to be aware
that every second means my unconsciousness
and all is well under the blanket that protects
so hurriedly i try and fall asleep
tonight my eyes will rest from weep
from things that have hurt me throughout the day
my dreams and fantasies will keep them away
just for now, just for tonight
my lullaby sleep will be alright
so swift, so suddenly, imagination begins
you and me so true, we’ll never end
I wanna stay forever just like this
And smother him with a million kisses
But soon I have to realize
He'll never be this, so open your eyes
I lay in bed, I’m back too soon
Cuz he’s just a dream that will never come true
