dirty dozen car

Your car

This is along the lines of the "dirty dozen" jokes. ("Your mama's so fat.....") I got to thinking of these because I know several people who have "older" vehicles and was reminded of some of the dirty dozen jokes I have heard over the years. Here is what I have so far.

Your car is so old ...

... it's liscense plate number is 2.
... the insurance company sends you a six-month calendar
... the only reason it's not called a horseless carriage is that there weren't any horses when it was built.
... when people ask if it's an 86 model, they literally mean 86.
... it takes a couple of tries to get over a speed bump.
... it has trouble going down a steep hill.
... you look both ways before crossing an intersection.
... you realize that a gallon of gas today costs more than a drive-in did when you first bought the car.
... most other cars of that year are now in a museum.
... you still think of speed limits as a challenge, but for different reasons.
... You can't remember the last time you made if two blocks without having to push.

Your car is so dirty, ...

... when you wash it, it turns two shades lighter.
... washing it cuts it weight in half.
... it was condemned. By the roaches.
... grass has started growing on it

Your car is so small, ...

... you have to step outside to change your mind.
... changing gears often results in a sexual harassment suit.
... people ask don't ask what model it is. They ask what scale it is.

Your car is so slow, ...

... people pass you on the right.
... people pass you on the sidewalk.
... your lawn mower goes faster.

Go back.

Hosted by www.Geocities.ws