Laws Of Life

Law of Mechanical Repair
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you will have to pee.

Law Of the Workshop
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner, even if it is square.

Law of Visual Probability
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi.
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law
If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Law of the Bath
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you do not want to be seen with.

Law of the Result
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of the Theatre
At any event the people whose seats are furthest from the asile arrive last.

Law of Coffee Temperature
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Rugs/Carpets
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the cost of the carpet.

Law of Logical Argument
Anything is possible if you do not know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law
If the shoe fits, it is ugly.

Oliver's Law
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Wilson's Law
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

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