It's time, once again, to rank the WWF superstars. For the uninitiated, this is where yours truly decides who is tops in pro wrestling according to the criteria of ring ability, mic ability, pop, current storyline, and title situation. Feel free to respond, even to challenge my rulings. The previous ranking for each superstar is shown in parenthesis.
Random WWF thoughts: Here are thoughts that don't fit into the rankings format but I feel I must share anyway:
1. (3) Kurt Angle- Can you believe that a WCW Champion is ranked number one on my rankings!?! Of course, I've only been ranking WCW performances for a month now, but even if I had allowed them in the Rankings before, a WCW Champ would have had a hard time making the top ten (harder still, given the fact that I refused to watch that horrible show). Kurt doesn't just rank number one because of his victory over Booker T on Smackdown!, he gets numero uno for bring the most interesting and exciting performer in wrestling over the past two weeks. His stuff with Austin before Invasion was funny and his matches were good (like when he took apart Raven). After Invasion, Angle did a surprising face turn, that worked out well although it was a tad hasty. I think fans have been wanting to cheer this guy for awhile, so now given the opportunity, the crowd is going BANANA. (Sorry, that's another literary inside-joke; read the book). I think his ovation in Pittsburgh might have been the loudest I've ever heard.
2. (2) Stone Cold Steve Austin- Austin is still WWF Champ and pulled off one of the most surprising swerves in the history of the industry (right up there with Hogan going to the NWO), yet he still doesn't reclaim number one spot. Why? Partially because Angle's work has been so good, but mostly because Austin has hardly wrestled of late. I know, I know- Vince hasn't been doing too much wrestling either, yet he was number one last week. The difference being the Austin is supposed to be a wrestler, a champion at that. Given the current storyline, it was okay that he wasn't defending. But a non-wrestling WWF Champion (who is admittedly injured, I'm not implying that Austin is coasting) does not hold top spot when a performer like Angle has the week he just had.
3. (1) Vince McMahon- Here's why I'm further convinced that the ECW Revolution and Austin turn were not a part of the original plan: a few weeks ago Vince was issued a summons stating that he would have to face his wife in court the day after Invasion. This was after Torrie Wilson has conspired with Linda to set Vince up, further making Vince and the WWF look like the bad guys, with Shane's little WCW looking like the likable upstarts (except for DDP). The big, bad WWF was keeping them off TV. Austin and Angle were interfering in Booker T's matchups, Vince was sexually harassing poor Torrie. Not a bad way of getting people to cheer for the return of WCW, right? The problem was WCW sucks. Their matches were poor, the announcers were horrible and performers were boring. The only legitimate stars of WCW were Booker T and DDP, neither of whom can carry a promotion (doubt me? Think of how well WCW did with Booker T as their standard-bearer). Consequently, nobody cared about Invasion because they had no one to cheer for. They were going to cheer for the Vince/Austin/Angle WWF and they weren't going to cheer for WCW. So the idea was changed. My proof? No mention of the summons or Vince's day in court was made on RAW.
4. (4) Shane McMahon- Actually, the biggest star in WCW is Shane McMahon (since Austin isn't strictly a member of WCW or ECW, he's a member of "the Alliance"). He's the only one that can cut a decent promo (unless you consider "who better than Kanyon" a decent promo) and the only one with legendary PPV matches (unless you consider DDP and Jay Leno vs. Hollywood Hogan and Eric Bischoff legendary). This, of course, isn't very good news for WCW, or the WWF whose product has been diminished by their involvement with WCW.
5. (18) Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley- Ah, Stephanie, oh how we've missed that screechy voice. I've missed a few other things from Mrs. Helmsley as well. Her hard... stares, her sharp... sense of humour, her pointed... remarks. Yes, beginning with her shocking return as new ECW owner we all good a good look at what lies beneath Stephanie's outer shell, and I for one am happy she has returned.
6. (20) Paul Heyman- Okay, so what did I mean when I said that the WWF's product has been diminished by its involvement with WCW? Well, for starters, Paul Heyman is ranked sixth. Moreover, when you look at the rankings (which of course are the sole opinion of me, yet still a good indicator of the direction of the company) counting non-wrestling personalities and wrestlers not currently doing a lot of wrestling that makes 60% of the top ten. Hey, this is the world of Sports Entertainment, where wrestling is often secondary to storylines, but what has happened is non-McMahon character development has become stagnant. The result is a personality associated with the storyline like Heyman gets elevated while the wrestlers themselves go unnoticed. Not a good thing. However, I think the WWF is going in the right direction in remedying that situation.
7. (5) Booker T- Another problem is that Booker T keeps getting elevated, even though nothing he does warrants it (well, except for the spineroonie). Perhaps that will change now that he no longer holds WCW gold, but I doubt it. I've tried to get behind this guy, but I can't. I can think of several performers that deserve the TV time more than Booker, some of whom even work for the Alliance. Perhaps I'm too much of a WWF loyalist, but nothing this guy has done has impressed me.
8. (8) Chris Jericho- At the top of the list of guys getting screwed by WCW is Chris Jericho (it must be deja vu for him). He was right there, right there developing a main event feud with Stone Cold Steve Austin when WCW came and screwed it up. First off, he couldn't win because the WWF needed Austin as champ with Invasion around the corner (it was not a time to try out a new champ, they needed their biggest star to have the belt). Secondly, when Booker T injured Austin at the King of the Ring, it pretty much killed that matches chance of having a memorable ending (thus diminishing Jericho's main event potential). At least they included Y2J in the inaugural brawl (with all the injuries, the WWF hardly had a choice) and had him dominate Booker T before it. Now? An exciting feud with Kris Kanyon! Just what Jericho needs.
9. (6) The Undertaker- Why to rank the Undertaker ninth? Well, he is the Undertaker, so that usually warrants top ten consideration, and he has had his own storyline. So he's next. However, he hasn't done anything of much interest of late, and does anybody care about his feud with Page anymore? Oh well, he was included in the Inaugural Brawl, although there wasn't a lot to choose from.
10. (-) The Rock- Who else do you know besides the Great One could make the ten spot without ever actually doing anything? Actually, how does one get number ten by doing nothing? Doing nothing doesn't appear in the criteria, does it? Here's how: Vince cuts an entire segment hyping your return, then Shane responds. Stone Cold, Kurt Angle and Booker T all make mention of your return. The WWF promotes as if Christ himself was returning, and the fans response probably exceed any response given to a Second Coming. I, like most, can't wait. The WWF hasn't been the same without Rocky. When he left I was hoping someone would pick up the ball, no one did (although key injuries prevented some from doing just that).
11. (-) Rob Van Dam- The F'in Show debuts at number eleven, not bad I must say. I was disappointed with his early appearances, he looked rusty, but RVD was able to skyrocket to the top of the Rankings with his showings this past week. Mr. Pay-Per-View came through at Invasion with he and Jeff Hardy stealing the show in the opinion of many observers (I can only go with what I heard). Mr. Monday Night then followed that up with a great match against Matt Hardy on Monday Night and a good tag-team bout with Kanyon against Jericho and Tajiri. This guy has superstar written all over him.
12. (7) Diamond Dallas Page- Despite the pushing of the envelope Page's heel-turn has taken in terms of storyline, his ring work has been a throwback to the heels of old- which isn't really a good thing. Outside of the ring Page is depraved, sick, twisted- a monster. Inside the ring he's a cowardly buffoon who is constantly ducking confrontation. When he can't escape, DDP then gets his ass handed to him by any and all, including Sara. It's pretty weak, actually. This from a guy who wanted to be "famous"?
13. (9) Kane- The fifth member of Team WWF, and believe me, fifth is the best way to describe Kane's place on that team. If the Rock or Triple H or Chris Benoit had been available, Kane would have been fighting with Albert and the Big Show (actually Rikishi would have given Kane a run for his money). But that's why it's good to have a guy like Kane, he's an instantly credible top-level replacement.
14. (11) Rhyno- Rhyno is poised to be a star if ECW does leave with WCW if the latter ever gets its own show. It is pretty obvious that the WWF likes what this guy brings, and I admit, he's had some good matches. But I gotta say, his matches are now beyond predictable. It's okay to have a short ring repertoire, but you got to be able to tell a different story in the ring every once in awhile.
15. (12) Tajiri- Tajiri takes a dive only because of the current storyline has been detracting from the wrestling, because his stuff has been great. Also, his place in the Federation has actually grown since the last posting: he teamed with Taker and Kane once, Chris Jericho another time, three of the biggest names in the sport. The WWF wisely decided to keep Tajiri on the WWF side, recognizing they had a marketable face that they didn't want to waste in a group-wide heel turn. If things keep going this way for the Japanese Buzzsaw business will indeed pick up.
16. (17) Jeff Hardy- This is two solo Pay-Per-View matches in a row for Jeff Hardy, with two different belts. You combine his match with RVD with the battle being fought by Trish Stratus and Torrie Wilson over him and it's pretty obvious that Jeff has been doing well for himself. Don't look now, but Jeff Hardy has held four titles in his WWF career and he's only twenty-three years old (granted, he never held any except the tag titles for any significant amount of time, but they all count).
17. (-) Lance Storm- If I can be serious for a moment here, I would like to talk about Lance Storm. He's a deserving recipient of the Intercontinental Championship, but I think the strap he really should be going after is the WCW Title. Maybe he's a little ways away from that, but I don't think he's that far away from the likes of Booker T and Diamond Dallas Page (he's still light years away from Kurt Angle, however).
18. (-) Tazz- I thought Tazz was doing a pretty good job as colour commentator on Smackdown!, but he can always be a commentator later. He's in the prime of his career so now would be a good time to capitalize on his "Tough Enough" fame and see if he will get a workable angle for the first time since leaving ECW (unless, of course, if you count his feud with Jerry Lawler).
19. (14) Albert- I wonder if they'll give this guy another chance when the company isn't embroiled in this Invasion thing, because he never got much of a chance to show what he could do as Intercontinental Champion. As soon as he won it WWF Titles (other than the Hardcore Belt) and feuds were rendered almost meaningless. Once they began to show some importance, he lost the strap. Too bad, because I think he deserves a real opportunity.
20. (-) Earl Hepner- Believe it or not, this is not the first time I've ranked ol' Earl. Back when this was just an e-mail newsletter instead of web page Earl Hepner made the rankings. I can't remember if it was by himself or as a tag team, but when Triple H started picking on Earl during the McMahon-Helmsley Era, Hepner teamed with the Rock to face Triple H and a partner. Then, as now, the Mighty Hepner stood victorious.
1. (6) Edge and Christian- Edge is also getting screwed by this WCW thing, as a soloist. He should be enjoying some King of the Ring glow, but that whole scenario is pretty much over (with the exception of the trophy E & C carry around. However, the WWF rightly recognize the value of these guys and have made sure to give them their TV time. The result? Largely due to their promos, these guys are the only tag team to shine of late.
2. (1) The Dudley Boyz- Hey, the Dudley Boyz did achieve one previously unaccomplished mile-stone last week: they were part of a pay-per-view main event. Right now, these two are the biggest stars in ECW, and were the only ones currently in the WWF to have broken through into superstardom after coming straight from ECW. If the Alliance ever do get their own TV show, the WWF will miss these guys.
3. (2) APA- Just when I thought these guys were on their last legs, they accomplish that which they haven't accomplished in over a year: winning the Tag Team Titles. I'd be more impressed, but I think the decision to give these guys the straps had more to do with the Dudley Boyz going to ECW than the belief that the APA are the best the WWF has to offer. However, it was a nice reward for a pair that had been doing some good vignette work of late.
4. (3) Palumbo and O'Haire- I have to say I've really been impressed by Sean O'Haire. Chucky hasn't been anything special in my opinion, but these two work well together. Because I didn't see it, I don't know how they fared against the APA at Invasion (other than the fact that they lost), so I have no choice other than to rank them below the WWF Champions.
5. (4) The Hardy Boyz- I think the WWF has handled the Hardy Boyz solo careers really well. While conspiracy theorists out there suspected the WWF would bust these two up, with Lita possibly being a contributing factor, the WWF went about it the right way. They keep the two together as a unit, while still having them pursue individual goals. Right now, Matt is getting the short end of the stick (he was left off two straight PPVs), but the truth is that Jeff has the bigger upside.
6. (-) Lance Storm and Mike Awesome- I think they should give Awesome more of a chance to display his own character (and no, I don't mean that awful WCW "That 70's Guy" gimmick). So far he's just been brooding, like his partner Lance, and that's not him. I also think they should change his stupid name, it was all right for the minors, but he's in the show now.
7. (-) Lita and Trish- Even though Jeff Hardy vs. RVD was reportedly incredible, and the main event contained an historic swerve, this is the match I am most upset about missing. Who cares if it was hardly a wrestling match, who cares if Trish and Lita's opponents can't wrestle? Actually, if you do care (and you're not a woman): get out. Now. You're not needed here.
8. (-) Stacey Keibler and Torrie Wilson- Was there any doubt that these two would lose? In the end, the WCW might have been the big winners as these two gave their all. Although, I wouldn't say that too quickly. Near the end, WCW tried to cram their programming with as much T&A as they could and it still plummeted in the rankings. It's all about balance.
9. (-) Show-Gunns- I don't know if these two will remain as a team, but why the hell not? If the WWF is going to keep these two, why not team them up so their is one less dull bout a night. Also, I think it is painfully clear that Billy Gunn does not have what it takes to succeed as a singles performer.
10. (8) Kai en tai- The Evil Duo make the rankings for their amazing ability to rush to the ring with all the other "superstars" and kick some WCW/ECW guys when someone else had brought them down. Oh, it's much harder than it looks. Remember kiddies: don't try this at home.
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THE YEAR 2000- YEAR IN REVIEW- See how the superstars of the WWF stacked up using my rankings system for the entire year 2000. Who was number 1, The Rock or Triple H? Who were the top tag teams? Also, the title pictures for each belt from the WWF Championship all the way down to the Light Heavyweight Title, with my own commentary on each reign.
LITA- ONE MAN'S OBSESSION- I admit, I am in love with Lita. I also admit that this behaviour has become a bit of an obsession. See pictures of the Team Extreme Diva, biographical info and random career facts, while I attempt to come to terms with the fact that I am in love with someone I see on TV.
PREVIOUS RANKINGS- Ranking archives dating back to November 1999. Missed a posting? Want to track my biases? Find all past information here.
SITE AWARDS- Here I list the multitude of awards (who knows? Maybe one day there will be a multitude of awards) that WWF Rankings has received.