05 April 2005 [4:15pm]

Playlist: Commit To This Memory CD - Motion City Soundtrack

It was amazing. Now I'm over & I almost don't want it back because I don't want what happened to happen again. But I miss him. A lot. If we were on the same page, I'd take the risk. I don't ever want to know what could have been. I want to know what happened.

I don't understand people who manage to continue with their on and off relationships. How I see it, either stay on, work through problems, because relationships are not about just good times and companionship, it's being with someone who understands and cares enough not to bail when the going gets tough. Some people are just inlove with the concept of love. And they'll say those heartwarming vicious words in morning, by midafter noon, unpleasent events occur, and a little after sunset, these so called love struck couples are broken up. So much for their love.

I pray for that never to be me.

Never live a day the same way. Find something new. Explore. Be spontaneous. Don't limit yourself to what you can't do. Limit yourself to the possiblities that crawling up your doorsteps... but sometimes, I can't even push myself to do that.

Holding on to the past means missing out on the future. I can't stop the future from becoming present but I can mold my future (I hope).

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karenina || save scrotie � 2005