I astound Stefanie...direct quote would be "You astound me"...not really gonna say how or why that came up...we'll just say it has something to do with Stefanie's muscle atrophy and her horrendous case of worms...she's lying in bed dying as I type this...it makes me sad that she's dying...anyways earlier tonight she pointed out the safety pin in her butt...that's right, I said safety pin in her butt. Apparently her pants ripped and instead of sewing them back together she stuck a safety pin on them and walks around with a big ol pin in the middle of her ass...it's pretty funny. She started bitching about how her nailpolish comes off easily or some such shit, and proceeded to bitch about having to pay three dollars for a bottle of nail polish that she just picks off when she gets bored...so when I told her not to bitch about it cause she had lots of money and surely could afford a three dollar bottle of nail polish, she replied with "business is slow". And to tell the truth I didn't catch on at first, but soon realized that she was refering to her status as a three dolla ho. I pretty much decided one day to just call her a three dolla ho, probably cause I was bored and thought it was funny, and so ever since then that's been my little pet name for her...haha here's a funny convo we had the other day:

H: "Hey Stef I just found three dollas"

S: "Didn't you find that last time?"

H: "Yeah, but don't you know why that's funny?"

S: "Cause I'm a three dollar whore?"

H: "Tha's right you three dolla ho"

Hahaha...three dolla make ya holla...

Last Friday I went home for Fall Break, and I rode back to Richmond with Blake and Stef, and Chicken at my feet. I had drained a lot of his water so it wouldn't slosh all over my feet, and for a while he was just sittin there chillin at my feet....until we stopped at McDonalds for a pee break. I completely forgot that he was at my feet, and in my haste to get to the bathroom, I knocked his tank over and all the water, and Chicken, poured out the side of Blakes car. Chicken landed on the footstep on the outside of my door, and when I tried to pick him up and put him in the little water that was left, he flopped right onto the pavement. So by now I'm really freaking out, and Blake is yelling at me for spilling smelly fish water all over his floor, and Stef is yelling that we need to get him water, and Raechel is just sitting in her car laughing. So I decided that getting him water would be a good thing, so Stef and I ran inside McDonalds to get cups of water, and the people there could not have been slower...when you hear "please I need water I just knocked my fish over", wouldn't you move kinda fast so the fish wouldn't die??? Yeah well apparently McDonalds employees are also fish killers in their time off cuase they were slow as shit getting my water...and when we finally got it we ran outside and looked for Chicken, but we couldn't find him anywhere. Turns out Blake picked him up and put him back in the tank while I left him out on the pavement to die....but I was extremely freaked out and I was being yelled at to do a million different things, so you can't really blame me for leaving him out there...ok well you kinda can, but whatever. So anyways I poured the water into the tank, but turns out I poured it straight onto Chicken. Stef said he tried to get out of the way of the stream of water, but I kept knocking him with it...I swear I didn't know...and since we asked for warm tap water, they gave us freezing cold machine water, and the poor little thing went into shock...he was floating on his side and was spitting things up out of his mouth...we pronounced him pretty much dead, and Raechel told me to flush him, but I decided that since his little gills were still flapping I would hang onto him and see if he would come around. I pretty much gave up hope when he started floating upside down, and for about a half hour Stef and I lamented the passing of Chicken, the fish who had lasted the longest out of all my other fish. I was feeling all sad, and extremely mad at myself for killing my precious little Chicken, when I looked down and saw him trying to swim...upside down...but he was still trying so we rejoiced, and kept a close eye on him until he was swimming rightside up again. Turns out he went into shock from the cold water, and I guess me pouring it right on him didn't help much either. Currently he's doing fine, swimming a little crooked (and no Stef, it's not due to fin overuse), but otherwise back to normal...he might have slight brain damage, but I can deal with that. I left him at home so that he wouldn't have to get into another car and relive his horrible experience. So my fish is a survivor, which he sorta has to be if he's my fish.

Coming tomorrow: the story of how I almost killed Chicken on the way home for break...I'm too tired and lazy to type it up now...

Yeah so I really think Stef is serious about taking the bottom bunk next semester...that makes me sad...I guess if she wants it bad enough to disrupt my whole routine and endanger my personal safety (cause I will fall out), then I guess she can just have it...cause I'm a nice roommate

It is 8:34 Monday morning and I am awake. I am never ever EVER awake this early...but this morning I have to haul my ass across the cold drillfield to pay the $76.28 software fee that my parents haven't paid yet, and since it's not paid, I can't register for classes...and I'm very mad. Some very nice guys tried to calm me down last night, to no avail, and now I'm just bitter that I had to wake up early on the ONE day I have class till 7:30 at night....arg

I somehow got Stef to agree to a roadtrip with me, my brother, and Chicken...haha she has no idea what she's in for...hahaha

Uh huh, so if you want to see the drunken pictures from Thursday night, too bad cuase most of them were on disposable cameras, but if you know us, then come by after break and see them, and if you don't know us, then you'll have to be satisfied with the few we did take on the digital camera...they should be posted sometime between now and graduation...basically whenever Stef has time cuase I don't know how to do anything but update this page :)Thursday Night/Friday morning after pizza

Riiiiight...so a bunch of people came over last night, and most of them got pretty drunk,including me, and drunken Hayley decided to take pictures...with Stef's $500 camera...she eventually took it away when I almost fell down from staggering too much, but I got some good ones before I was too drunk to see straight. Click below to see funny lookin drunk people...Wednesday Night

I'm really not as mean to Stef as she makes me out to be, I swear. Oh and today on the elevator some girl got on at the second floor and rode up to the fourth floor. Second floor to fourth floor. As in TWO FUCKING FLIGHTS OF STAIRS. Some people...

The other night Stef and I went downstairs to get drinks out of the soda machines, and she graciously let me use some of the $50 worth of dimes her dad gave her...so anyways I got water, and then she got water and then juice from a different machine. So I got my water bottle and stood there waiting for her to hurry the hell up, and she eventually started walking towards me, but then she stopped and started yelling at me about where her water was. So since I didn't have it I was like um, i dunno, and she kept yelling at me for not getting it out of the machine, and then I saw the bottle tucked under her arm. So she was yelling at me for losing something she had the whole time...

When you wake up and have to pee really bad and feel really gross cause you just woke up and want to take a shower so you don't look like hell for class, and you can't because the cleaning ladies have a no admittance sign in front of the bathroom, you tend to get a little bitter. And you start debating just going up or down one flight of stairs, but then you remember the stories you've heard about what happens in the 12th floor bathrooms, so you decide to just sit in your room in your robe and wait. And the more time that goes by the more bitter you become, and the more you keep rambling on in your webpage....I even got up before 11 this morning, mostly due to Stef forgetting to pull the shade down, but also because I really had to pee, and I wanted to take a shower...damn you cleaning ladies for making sure we have a sanitary bathroom environment when I want to be in there...

Sunday 11:07 p.m.- So I was packing on Friday and I had my bag on my bed. I'm all folding clothes and leaning against the bed, and I randomly decide to put my forehead on the bar that's the bottom of Stef's bed; and I felt the bar kind of vibrating. Since I thought it might be a bad thing to have a bed that makes noises and vibrates against your forehead, I called Stef over and told her to put her head against the bar. After convincing her that this wasn't something I was going to make her do and then make fun of her for it, she did it, and determined that the cause was her little purple fan (which, by the way, has fallen on my head several times). She goes on to explain that she just leaves the fan on all the time, and it makes her bed vibrate. I looked at her, and she knew what my perverted mind was thinking, so she says, and this is a DIRECT quote: "My bed vibrates, cause, well, a girls gotta do something." That's my girl

Hey Stef I deleted that video I made last night...no hard feelings, right? I don't mind sharing that I will probably fall out of the top bunk,due to my restless sleep of course, therefore you would be contributing to my overall safety if I get the bottom bunk. Hayley: "Mom guess what. Stefanie says she wants the bottom bunk next semester." Hayley's Mom: "No!!! You'll fall out...this is not good." Hayley: "Yeah Mom, I know, but what can I do?" Yeah Stef.....what can I do?.....

12:17 Friday morning- it is officially documented that Stefanie snores...come by the room some time to check out the video I just made of her sleeping and snoring.

Road trip tomorrow with my girls...I'm excited...Stef is gonna bring her camera and document the hilarity that is Hayley, Mary, and Stef, so be prepared.

I gave Stef a makeover tonight, so now she's double beautiful...we went out tonight and attacked people with the camera...check out the picture page.

I told you she would deny it. But she does snore...tonight I'm gonna get it on video and then the whole world will see, or rather, hear...hahaha

I love Stefanie because she thinks she doesn't snore, even though she does. In fact, she's snoring as I'm writing this. Everyday I tell her that she snored the night before, and everyday she denies it. But I'm the one who is up till 2:00 every morning, which is around the time she starts snoring, so I don't really think she can contradict me on that...who would better know if she snores...me, who hears it every night, or her, who is sleeping, and snoring? I thought so.

I just borrowed a dish cloth from Tristin, and gave it to Stef to wash the dishes so I could have a clean mug for hot chocolate...and while she was washing them she splashed water on her pants...it was funny...and then she made me dry the dishes, which I resented, since they're her dishes, not mine. Stupid Stefanie.

So we went to Pritchard yesterday (Pritchard=very smelly all guys dorm) to pick up football tickets, and drop something off for Stef's brother. Stefanie refused to touch any of the door knobs and/or handles, in case she got a disease, so it was up to me to be normal and open the doors. We found room 3101 and got the tickets, but the guy had lost our athletic cards, which made Stef mad even though she doesn't go to any of the games, so we decided to go see her brother and come back and maybe they would have turned up. He ended up finding them right before we reached the elevator, and we got one of the tickets free, maybe because he thought we were funny, maybe becuase he knew he was ripping busy people off, whatever; then we got into the elevator and instead of touching the little 4 button, Stef kicked it, so now the next person who touches it will get all the germs that are on the bottom of her shoe. We found her brother's room, and she kicked it several times, so she wouldn't have to use her hands to knock, and then we decided he wasn't there, so we left it with his neighbor, and guess who had to open the door? That's right...me. So now if I get a disease, I'll make sure Stef gets it too...hehe

Stupid Stefanie informed me tonight that second semester she wants the bottom bunk. This of course made me very sad, considering theres a reason I put her ass in the top bunk to begin with...and she decided to tell me as I'm sticking up my cute new french memo board and bulletin boards on the wall between her bed and mine...good timing Stef, cause now all I can think about is how in 2 months I'll have to move everything up 5 feet on the wall. Why can't you just be happy where I put you? Stupid Stefanie.

Yay for people actually signing our guestbook...Stefanie is blowing into her water bottle and occasionally looking over at me and laughing. And now she's blowing Christmas tunes, and singing "funny shit funny shit dadadadada da funny shit", to the tune of "Lollipop". Dear lord help me.

Stefanie will not stop making sexual comments about Chicken...today she really crossed the line talking about little white clouds in the water...think real hard and you'll figure it out...anyways my fish is not a homosexual, nor does he jack off to images of us, as suggested by Tristin. And no, Stefanie, he will not eventually have to switch fins due to overuse. I think that Stefanie jacks off to images of the fish...no wonder she's always rolling around on her bed at night...hehe

Stefanie thinks she's magnificent, but she's really not. First hand experience has proven quite otherwise...between threatening to kill my innocent little Chicken, and physically abusing me when I sleep (yeah that's right, I'm on to you Stef- bruises just don't appear ya know), I'd say that she's anything but magnificent...she's just my roommate.