EULOGIES should me more along these lines....
THE GIRLS PLAY BALL
INTELLIGENCE is not as common as you think!
Fun and games at a UNIVERSITY RIOT!
There are SOME DAYS...
A KUMI KUMI Guide for the novices. A MUST read!
A POEM for someone special!
DEAREST JOHN: John Doe's better half replies with energy to issues raised by her worse half!
DEAREST JANE: A man addresses issues such as crossing rivers for his beloved...
FAVOURITE MOVIES Some notable personalities share their favourite flicks
PRESS RELEASE FROM THE AFGHANISTANI BROADCASTING CORPORATION The proprietor of Afghanistan's first TV studio shares his visions
DEDICATIONS: Music is the language of the heart -- touching messages to loved and not so loved ones

Even before you accuse me of neglecting the Room, let me beat you to the gun. You are right. I have shamelessly ignored it. I have treated it with a fine disdain. For those of us new to this allow me to remind you that I have about a million other things to do and this is a last or close to last priority!

But then again better late than never....

The other weekend I was in Thika for a surprise Birthday bash for my friend Ann. I came away with the following Dossier of the town.

PEOPLE

The people of Thika are straightforward, relaxed and easy going. They don't mind telling you that you are an ass to yourself, in marked contrast to the people of Nairobi who tell you only what you want to hear.

STRUCTURE

Thika is a town largely composed of corners. It is impossible to drive for more than 30 seconds in a straight line.

It also has a dense collection of four and five story buildings. It is unfortunate that the owners do not seem to have consulted their neighbours prior to painting their buildings. The resultant explosion of colour has to be seen to be believed.

ENTERTAINMENT

The people of Thika are not fussy. All they want is a good cold drink and good company. This is why every other building hosts a bar. The ratio of bars to buildings is very close to 1.

For the ambitions ones there is an establishment rejoicing under the name of Vybestar. Its chief claim to reputation is cheap beer and soda (60 bob and 40 bob) and a DJ who cannot seem to keep his mouth shut and insists on introducing every song. The DJ finds himself in my hall of fame for playing Mariah Carey and "U Got It Bad", with reggae beats that quite frankly is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.

To my friends who rejoice in having this gentleman as their head of state, let me quite frankly say that this dude is a danger to himself and everyone else.

I heard him the other day on Television saying that "the inspectors did not find any weapons because they have been hidden". Talk about being damned if you do and damned if you don't!

No one in their right minds would ever even think of using Nuclear Weapons for the excellent reason that the response would be in kind and at the end of it all even the cockroaches will be no more. It is inconceivable that they will ever be used. Forget that nonsense you saw in James Bond and in those third rate television movies and cheap novels.

Everyone fondly imagines that they are responsible. Bush believes he is and Blair believes he is. So I imagine does Saddam, Musharaff and everyone else with nukes. Who is the authority to decide who is responsible and who is not? I do agree that Saddam is no Saint and has gassed his own people, but then again Bush and his fellow Americans did far more unspeakable things to Native Indians, Blacks, Vietnamese, Koreans and about a few dozen other nationals within and without their borders. I'll welcome a response to this particular issue.

And to crown it off the travesty of ignoring the United Nations and NATO simply takes the biscuit. Bush is attacking Saddam for flaunting UN regulations, and in the process himself also flaunts the UN Security Council Resolutions?

Classical case of preaching water and drinking wine. To Bush and Blair and other like minded war mongering Hitleresque individuals this is a big SCREW YOU!

{Bush! Osama! PLO! Bush! Osama! PLO! Bush! Osama! PLO!} - This part is to drive the FBI crazy :-)

"You are unique like everyone else"

If your sorry behind is a fan of Gideon Moi, Nick Salat or other celebrations of intelligence of their ilk see why they are in the Agumbaru Corner!
The Journal is back up and running. What have I been up to?
Read Issue 49: Encounter with muggers, of Bush and left handed compliments

24 February: Shai's Birthday!
25 February: Back to the old routine :-(
28 February: Visit Masai Mara with my lads!
29 February: Nothing. This year is not a leap year
3 March: Recover from Masai Mara

Since am too lazy to reply to you all, this will have to do
Aida: ?!!!!!!
Kui, Ciru & Kenyana : It was lovely to meet you!
Sin: For greasing the trip BUGGER YOU!
Jinx & Baddy: Forwards!
JP: My son, you owe me money. Ferguson and his lads got a good taste of O²
Jimmy Earth to Jimmy!

Frequently Asked Questions: These need addressing