EULOGIES should me more along these lines....
THE GIRLS PLAY BALL
INTELLIGENCE is not as common as you think!
Fun and games at a UNIVERSITY RIOT!
There are SOME DAYS...
A KUMI KIMI Guide for the novices. A MUST read!
A POEM for someone special!
DEAREST JOHN: John Doe's better half replies with energy to issues raised by her worse half!
DEAREST JANE: A man addresses issues such as crossing rivers for his beloved...
FAVOURITE MOVIES Some notable personalities share their favourite flicks
PRESS RELEASE FROM THE AFGHANISTANI BROADCASTING CORPORATION The proprietor of Afghanistan's first TV studio shares his visions
DEDICATIONS: Music is the language of the heart -- touching messages to loved and not so loved ones

In response to public demand I have shelved the complete overhaul of the site and instead shall do it incrementally. For those of us who only read cereal box labels, that means bit by bit. Naturally there shall be the odd broken links and one or two script errors but hey -- you insisted and I got tired of deleting your innumerable mails!

Why have I not been updating the site? Well, contrary to many expectations I do have a life and I was very busy attending to that excellent life. I get a great deal out of my 18 hours of awakeness but there are times when all of that time is occupied in other -- ah -- more profitable pursuits. So let me hasten to reassure you:

- Am not dying somewhere
- Am not attending to the unexpected arrival of my contribution to the gene pool. As a matter of fact am entertaining applications for suitable partners for this enterprise. (Those with FACIAL HAIR OF ANY KIND need not trouble to apply.)
- Have not been arrested for gun running or any other offence
- Have no affiliation of any kind with that goon of dread locked cretins known as Mungiki and as a result am not running for cover.

In short I am alive, well and in excellent health and spirits.

NEWS FLASH: The new Government is sending Jambonet, that useless monstrosity of a service provider, PACKING! Those jokers are no more and happy days are here again!

2002 has by and large been a mixed year in a myriad of ways. Some things about the year were jolly good. Others were not so jolly good. Some were outright hogwash. I have taken the liberty to list down one or two things in a blunt and open fashion...

If your feelings or ideas are shattered, CALL THE COPS! They might listen to your gripes but I can assure you that I will not!

Personally, I cannot complain about my 2002. It was a good 2002, as 2002s go. It may have come after 2001 and before 2002 but it came anyway and I didn't mind it.

Now we are in 2003 and have to get used to a number of things. These include

- Writing dates with 2003 instead of 2002. Allow me to remind you that 2002 is no longer the current year.
- Saying President Moi. Let me hasten to remind you that gent is no longer at the helm. Our man Baks is now the top dog.
- A whole year's worth of wedding anniversaries, birthdays, holidays and whatnots to remember. If you're like me (and I know you are) you religiously and regularly forget a large number of these and end up contributing to global warming by other people thinking very un-Christian thoughts about you. If you are further like me you will refuse to take hints (subtle or otherwise) and make things still worse. Let me console you by informing you that you are not alone!
- Despite the fact that there is a new government, new year, new energy and new spirits, some things never change. One is that my four walls remain a magnet for relatives, both close as well as those so far removed one needs a telescope to set eyes on them. Another is that some billy goats when making use of the cell phones thoughtlessly acquired for them will hide their numbers then proceed to beep you. My friend if you are in this category you are a DONKEY!!!!

People who live in glass houses should change in the basement

2002 Review
The Irregular Times
I have retired some of the regulars until further notice. Which ones? That is for me to know and you to find out
I will change things on a fairly regular basis, but at my own pace.
Something else I cannot recall right now.

January 1: Our good man Baks is now Captain of the Country!
January 12: Finally get round to watching the Red Dragon

Since am too lazy to reply to you all, this will have to do
All o y'all: Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, Happy New Year and Happy Birthday. NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!
Aida: Truly one of a kind!
Laura: Happy Belated Birthday.
Kris: Everything has changed except you. You are still a jackass!
Allan: Where on earth are you hiding yourself?
All those idlers who swamped my mail with irate mail demanding restoration of this hallowed room, LEAVE ME ALONE!

Frequently Asked Questions: These need addressing