| Nobility. What is it that makes someone noble? The dictionary defines it as having or showing qualities of high moral character such as courage, honor, or generosity. I define it as walking the thin line between nobility and foolishness. I have attempted to walk this line, only to burn in flames. I have believed that love will work out, held onto faith when I was surrounded by faithlessness, and have found out that I have no control over my happiness. I handed that over to someone years ago, and forgot to get it back before I left. If you haven't already, read my piece on timing. Now you have a point of reference. Well I was forced to confront my worst fears tonight, and it bothered me a little bit more than I would have liked. It's been four years since we've been together and I still have strong feelings for her, even though now I know they're not reciprocated. So was I noble or just a fool? Some may take the romantic angle and say that I was noble. They may say that I was following my heart and attempting to do the right thing for love. Others may take the opposite opinion and call me a fool. Perhaps even pathetic for holding onto something that apparently wasn't there. The sad part is that I don't know which is right. Part of me says, "Hey you gave it a shot". The other half of me is angry at myself for pushing everyone else away. Confusion is an understatement. What do you think? Is it better to be noble, or safe? The Rain King 6/13/02 |