The Visitfag
"I see you," whispered Rex.
A moon appeared from behind the clouds. Something human-like that moved fast leaving streaks behind lurked in the bushes. Suddenly the creature ran out of the bushes and towards Andy across the driveway. Rex howled and started barking. The creature jumped on Andy and knocked him down, tearing his pants, and scratching across the tip of his penis. Andy twisted in sexy pain. Rex ran after the creature which jumped over the chain-link fence into the bushes behind the house. Rex pointed his ass at the bushes and farted dog shit out of his ass. Shit flew into the bushes. Rex saw a fat man in a tank top walk out, covered in dog shit. It was Shitso.
"Damn you, Rex," said Shitso. "I was after that creature for days. And you screwed it up. Now its gone."
Benny the gray cat has run away from the house and joined Rex.
"Now you owe me," said Shitso. "I'm a visitfag who will be staying at your house."
AT THE DAWN OF THE CENTURY, REX THE GERMAN SHEPHERD DOG AND BENNY THE GRAY CAT FUCKED FOR A SHITTY WORLD. DRIVEN BY ASS-BITION, SEXUAL DESIRES, A THIRST FOR ASS-VENTURE, AND FUCKING THE ULTIMATE STORY. THEY'RE STRANDED IN A STRANGE AND SAVAGE SHIT. BEFRIENDED BY RETARDED PEOPLE. EACH DAY IS A DESPERATE FUCK TO SURVIVE�
Sir Alexei Samul's THE SHIT WORLD
IN CALIFORNIA, IN VALLEY OF ENCHANTMENT, ON SAN BERNARDINO MOUNTAINS, IN CRESTLINE AREA.
REX AND BENNY 42: THE VISITFAG
Shitso was in the house. Alexei's mom bitched hysterically. Such awful man as Shitso is living here. Shitso pissed all over the toilet seat and made Alexei's dad sit on it and take a shit. Shitso rubbed shit out of his ass all over his penis and stuck it in Alexei's mom's vagina. Rex and Benny slept in Shitso's shit. Shitso wiped his ass with TV remote controls. Shitso wiped his sweat-soaked tank-top all over Rex and Benny. Shitso shaved off his body hair, put them on a plate and ate them. He made Rex and Benny eat his pubic hair. He popped boils on his ass and sprayed pus all over Rex and Benny. Shitso rubbed his ballsac all over the carpet. Shitso pissed in corners all over the floor and walls.
Everybody went to sleep. Rex and Benny were sleeping on Shitso's sweaty tank-top. Suddenly they heard a window shatter and some kind of humanoid creature dove out of it into the night. Rex and Benny ran around and saw that Shitso was gone.
"That creature was here," said Rex. "And Shitso probably went hunting it."
Rex and Benny jumped outside out the broken window. There was a howl from somewhere in town.
"That is not a coyote," said Benny.
In the morning Andy and Corey came by the house. Andy needed to pick up the check for the work he did. Suddenly Andy felt sick and collapsed in convulsions. Rex and Benny ran over to him. Andy was taken inside the house. Alexei laughed at Andy and should be beaten for that. The scratch on Andy's penis glowed with white semen color. Shitso came up to Corey the black kid and dragged him away to his house in VOE. Shitso dragged Corey into the backyard of his house made of shit bricks. Shitso had a pissmelon plantation in the backyard. Pissmelons look like watermelons but they are yellow, warm, and salty inside. Shitso turned Corey into a black slave on his pissmelon plantation. Corey pissed the pissmelons, picked the pissmelons, and loaded them in a truck while Shitso whipped him. Corey answered "Yes, massah," to Shitso's every request. Shitso�s truck is made of hard shit, with fart gas for fuel. Windshield and windows are made of frozen piss and tires are made of semi-crusty semen.
Rex and Benny needed to track down the creature that scratched Andy's penis and find some answers to his condition. Rex and Benny sniffed around the driveway and all they found was Shitso's scent.
"I guess the creature leaves no distinct shit stink or penis stink behind," said Rex.
But as Shitso said he was after the creature, then it means he was following it and Rex and Benny could trace it back to him. Rex and Benny followed Shitso's ass stink down the road to the National Forest. They continued following it into the woods. Rex and Benny walked through the forest and saw tepees standing in the clearing. Apparently this was some kind of village. A lot of lost civilizations live in the forests of San Bernardino mountains. Rex and Benny walked up to a tepee that looked a like penis made of coyote skins. Two guards stood by it, with spears that had silver tips. The guards came at Rex and Benny and scratched across their assholes with the silver spear tips.
"My ass," meowed Benny. "I'm gonna kill!"
Rex jumped on a guard and Benny jumped the other one. Rex and Benny's dicks penetrated the crusty shit on the guards' assholes. Rex and Benny pissed up their assholes.
"Stop!" said a nigger woman who walked out of a tepee. Her hair was woven into human penises. Rex and Benny dropped on the ground.
"Silver reveals the beast," she said. "I�m a shafag of this village."
"What the fuck are you talking about?" barked Rex.
"A fat fuck had his sexy penis scratched by a feral beast," said the shafag woman. "He attacked our village, raped our people in the following manner. First his wolf penis penetrated the crusty shit on our people's assholes. Next he pissed up their assholes--".
"That's great," barked Rex. "Shitso lied. He wasn't hunting the beast, he is the beast."
"Only silver and fire used against the sexy body of the beast can destroy it," said the nigger shafag bitch. "Once somebody is scratched they will become the beast. There is no antidote."
"That means Andy will become the beast," said Benny. "Where do these creatures come from?"
"They live in a valley where the sun never fucks," said the shafag woman. "Go deep into the forest, toward Silverwood Lake, and you will find the valley."
The shafag woman gave Rex and Benny spear tips made of silver. Rex and Benny walked away from the village and into the forest to find the dark valley. They needed to get a sample of the creature's blood or shit and maybe find an antidote. They stuck spear tips up their assholes.
"All this shit sounds like werewolf stories," said Benny. They continued into the forest.
Back in the house Andy was laying in fever. Alexei's bitchy mom walked around and bitched.
"Andrew's mom doesn't take care of him," said Alexei's bitchy Russian mom.
Alexei the gay Russian kid with gay glasses was in Rim of the World High School on the mountains near Rimforest. Kids at school pulled a hood over the face of some gay fat kid and told Alexei that he can take free hits. Alexei slightly hit the kid on the head. The kid then was set free and started socking Alexei in the face. Alexei's glasses went flying into the air.
"Step on the fucking things! Beat the shit out of the Russian!" yelled the kids.
Suddenly Andy got up from the bed. He has never felt better in his life. He guessed the sickness that afflicted him was over.
Rex and Benny came to a valley. It was covered in thick piss fog.
"These creatures must prefer to live here where the sun never fucks," said Benny.
"The atmospheric conditions must be trapping piss clouds over the valley," said Rex.
Rex and Benny headed down into the forest covered in piss fog. Rex and Benny inhaled stinky urine. There were distant howls. Rex and Benny haven't seen any werewolves yet.
Night settled upon the west coast. Andy was working outside, when moon showed from the sky and moonlight hit his sexy body. Andy howled and his sexy body grew fur. His face turned to snout. He grew pointed ears on his head. Fangs grew in his mouth. Andy's penis and testicles grew hair and fur and ripped through his pants. Alexei's bitchy mom came out to bitch at Andy. Andy is taking money from the family by working for her husband.
Andy howled into the night. This bitch woman has pissed him off too much. Alexei's mom screamed in terror at the sight of the werewolf. Also howling is bad luck because then bad men or wolves will come. She shrieked and screeched into the night. She cried big tears, as Andy bared his werewolf fangs, jumped on her stupid ass, shredding apart her tits and vagina. He raped her up the ass with his wolf dick, and then tore her apart with his fangs and ate her, leaving a skeleton behind.
Rex and Benny walked through the dark forest. Suddenly they heard howls all around them. Rex and Benny saw werewolves running through the woods. Rex and Benny ran through the forest in terror. The night exploded into howls.
"How haven't these creatures overrun the world yet," meowed Benny.
Rex and Benny ran through the trees. Werewolves ran around them and surrounded them. A werewolf jumped on Rex. Werewolf's penis penetrated the crusty shit on Rex's asshole. The werewolf pissed inside Rex. Rex turned his head, pulled the silver spear tip out of his ass and stabbed the werewolf with it. The werewolf howled, transformed into a sexy man with muscles, and exploded into a pile of shit. Benny ran up a tree. Werewolves started going up trees. They disappeared up above and started urinating down on Benny. Benny fell toward a werewolf below, grabbed the spear tip out of his ass in his mouth, and hit the werewolf in the penis. The werewolf transformed into a sexy man with muscles and exploded into a pile of shit.
Andy the werewolf jumped on Bill the garbage man back in VOE at night. Andy raped Bill up the crusty shit on his ass. Andy tore into Bill and took out his intestines with shit in them and ate them.
Rex and Benny walked through the fog-choked valley at night. Moon was shining in the sky, its beams penetrating the darkness. Rex and Benny came to a cave. They went inside it.
"I noticed silver transforms them back to humans before it kills them," said Rex.
"Smells like fart stink in this cave," said Benny. "A single spark will set off an explosion."
"They attacked us," said Rex. "Is that possible to turn a dog or a cat into a werewolf?"
The cave ended in a large cavern. Rex and Benny saw a dozen werewolves sleeping on the ground. They have found their lair. Rex ran over to one and dug his teeth into it. The werewolf howled. Rex tore off its penis in his mouth and he and Benny ran with it. A dozen werewolves got up and started running through the cave after them.
"Fart stink!" said Benny. "I have an idea."
Benny scratched his nails hard against the rock and created sparks. Rex and Benny dove for the exit as the cave lit up in flames. Werewolves exploded into burning shit. Rex and Benny's sexy penises were caught in flames. Rex and Benny rolled on the ground. Having got the werewolf penis Rex and Benny headed out of the valley. Benny kept werewolves at bay with the silver spear tip.
They walked up Highway 138 through town at night. Full moon shined in the sky. Suddenly there was a howl and a fat werewolf in a tank top ran out of the darkness.
"Fucking Shitso!" yelled Benny. Rex spat the chunk of werewolf's flesh out of his mouth. Werewolf Shitso picked up Rex and Benny by their throats and started licking their penises with his dog tongue. Suddenly a werewolf in shredded "Volcom" shirt jumped out of the bushes and tackled Shitso to the ground. It was Andy.
Rex grabbed the werewolf penis in his teeth. It was bloody and very tasty. Andy and Shitso werewolves had hot sex together. Andy beat Shitso's sexy body. Shitso beat Andy's sexy body. They barked and howled.
"Okay, this shit is getting weird," said Benny.
They ran through town when suddenly there there was stomping noise and a moose came running out of the darkness at Benny. The fur on Benny's tail stood up and he screeched as the moose tried to ram him with its antlers. Benny jumped on the moose and started crawling up its ass. The moose's ass ripped open, blood and shit poured out and it fell dead.
"Come on! Who's next!" meowed Benny. "I'll kill many of you."
Rex and Benny ran into the backyard of the house. Rex chewed up the werewolf penis into little chunks. Rex poked the silver tip into a chunk and it exploded into shit. But before that the cells transformed into human cells. Rex needed to have silver cure, but not destroy. Alexei's dad brought out all kinds of food and some household chemicals to mix with the silver but none of it worked. Cells kept exploding into shit. Rex and Benny were running out of options.
Andy the werewolf decided to kill Rex and Benny. He has become a beast and lost his mind. Andy ran through the darkness and came flying out of the night. He pushed Alexei's dad who went flying through the glass door. Andy shot shit out of his hairy asshole at Rex. REX WORE THE SHIT LIKE A TUXEDO! Andy started mauling Rex. Benny grabbed the silver spear tip, shit on it, and stuck the tip coated in shit in Andy's sexy body. Andy howled, twisted in pain, and fell down. He transformed back into a human and lay still.
"You killed him!" yelled Rex. "Damn you, Benny!" Suddenly Andy stood up.
"What the fuck happened?" said Andy. He was alive and didn't explode into shit.
"That's it," said Rex. "Silver mixed with shit cures the werewolves." Andy petted Rex and Benny.
For the rest of the night Rex and Benny stood on the driveway. Shitso werewolf howled and sprinted out of the darkness. Rex and Benny got out of the way. Shitso landed on a silver spear tip with his ass, howled, transformed into a fat human fuck, and exploded into shit.
THE END