More Than Hufag
Benny the gray cat pissed on his leash and it ripped. Rex the German shepherd dog stuck a small stick up his peehole, stood up on his rear legs pointing his erection up.
"The pressure of the piss will shoot out the stick and could kill a bear," said Rex.
Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin were down at the woodshop. Nikki and Kevin live in a town of Running Piss Springs, Corey and Andy live in a town of Crestline. Andy came to work for Alexei's stepdad in woodworking and brought the others along.
As Rex and Benny stood by the house, the bushes spread and a bear walked out of them. Rex and Benny stared in horror. The bear stood over them and growled. Rex kicked a pebble at the bear with his paw.
"Hey, you son of a bitch," barked Rex. "Come and get me."
Rex started running into the woods. The bear turned and set off after him.
AT THE DAWN OF THE CENTURY, A BAND OF FAGGOTS SET OUT TO PROVE THE IMPOSSIBLE, THE SEXISTENCE OF A SHITTY WORLD. GERMAN SHEPHERD, GRAY CAT, STEPBROTHER, GIRLFRIEND, NIGGER, AND FAG, ALL FUCKING THE STORY OF A LIFETIME! THEY'RE STRANDED IN A STRANGE AND SAVAGE SHIT, BEFRIENDED BY RETARDED PEOPLE. TOGETHER THEY FUCK TO SURVIVE IN THIS AMAZING WORLD OF LOST CIVILIZATIONS AND TERRIFYING CREATURES. ALWAYS FUCKING FOR A WAY HOME, A WAY OUT OF...
Sir Alexei Samul's THE SHIT WORLD
IN CALIFORNIA, IN RIMFOREST, ON SAN BERNARDINO MOUNTAINS, IN LAKE ARROWHEAD AREA.
REX AND BENNY 3: MORE THAN HUFAG
Rex ran through the forest under a log as the bear chased after him and roared. Rex ran under a log. Few seconds later a bear went jumping right over it. Rex the dog ran and whistled in sexy fear. The bear roared as it leapt after him. Rex ran out of the forest and ended up in a clearing surrounded by rock cliffs on all sides. The bear roared as it came at him. Steam escaped out of its mouth. Fart escaped out of the bear's ass. Rex backed up and suddenly the ground collapsed beneath him. Rex went falling deep into a pit of sewage whirlpool. Rex was spinning and was sucked under. Turds went in his mouth. Rex ate shit and drank piss.
Alexei saw that Rex was gone. Alexei doesn't speak a single word. He is not mute. Alexei ran to the woodshop and tapped Alexei's dad. Alexei and Alexei's dad ran up to the house. Alexei pointed that Rex and Benny were gone.
"Rex! Rex!" yelled Alexei's dad.
"Alexei! Alexei! Alosha," yelled Alexei's bitchy mom. "Come back! We'll get you a new dog." Alexei's bitchy mom calls Alexei, Alosha.
Benny, Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin went into the woods to find Benny. They came to a place where Rex disappeared. They were trapped by cliffs when the same bear came out at them. They started backing up and fell down the sewage whirlpool pit. They were spun around.
"Swim for the edges," meowed Benny.
Shit went up Benny's mouth, shit went up Corey's penis, Kevin's penis, Andy's penis. Shit went up Nikki's vagina and nipples. They were sucked down into sewage.
Benny, Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin came swimming up out of a lake in the forest. They swam out on shore. The four humans and a cat saw Rex the dog walking along the shore and wagging his tail.
"Like a bad condom," meowed Benny to Rex.
They didn't know where they were. Must be some other side of the forest. Rex picked up a stick in his teeth when Andy grabbed it away.
"This looks like a human femur," said Andy.
Darkness came and the gay moon shined in the sky. In the dark a screaming man came running out of the forest. He started yelling at Andy, Nikki, nigger Corey, and Kevin to run. Naked men on horses went galloping out of the woods. The man was knocked down. Men on horses spread out a net and captured Andy and Nikki. A lasso was thrown around Rex and Benny's ballsacs and they were yanked. A naked horsefag knocked down Kevin and Corey. A horse erupted piss out of its penis in Corey's mouth.
They found themselves riding in a horse-drawn cage wagon. It was midday. The man had a crushed larynx and couldn't speak.
"There is a horse-fucked carriage?" barked Rex. "I'd expected we'd be in a car."
"I wonder who our captors are?" Andy posed a gay question.
The carriage stopped. The canvas was torn off of it and our faggots saw naked men, some wearing black capes walking around. A man shoved his penis through cage bars at Nikki. The wagon door was opened.
"Out of the wagon," said a naked man.
Rex, Benny, Andy, Nikki, Kevin, and Corey got out of the wagon along with the prisoner man. They found themselves in an arena of some sort, with stone buildings around like that of a Roman Empire. Naked men blew trumpets and a fat queer fuck with blond hair, a purple robe with white penises design on it walked out. He was carrying a golden dildo scepter of dick and balls shape.
"All fuck Shit Mage!" yelled the naked men and trumpets blew.
Shit Mage stabbed the prisoner man with the scepter. Shit poured out of him which Shit Mage ate.
"That is what happens when a slave runs," said Shit Mage. "Now, concerning our new captors. Take the men to the prison cell. They will be employed as slaves to mine sewage. The cat and the girl will be here to please the Fagicians. And the dog is strong. He shall go to the arena and be a warrior."
Naked men escorted Rex, Andy, Corey, and Kevin into a jail cell within a building. There they found another prisoner man. They were locked in behind bars.
"Do you know anything about this?" Rex barked a question.
"The Shit Mage is a wizard who controls feces to a certain sextent," said the man. "And the naked men are Fagicians. They serve Shit Mage and capture slaves. The only way to regain freedom is fight in the arena. I'm a championfag. Three more ass-rapes and I will be a free man."
They introduced each other. The man's name was Solofag.
Naked men pushed Nikki into a room along with a light-blue bra and a skirt. Benny the cat was thrown at Nikki and scratched her tits with his claws on accident.
"I'm not putting this shit on," said Nikki.
"You better," hissed Benny. "Otherwise we're dead."
Nikki took off her clothes, revealing her tits and vagina. She put on a bra and a skirt to look sexy. Later they were in a main hall, where Shit Mage laid naked on sheets soaked in shit. Several whores and cats were lined up before him. Shit Mage walked up looking at them.
"I'm a powerful wizard of shit," said Shit Mage. "And I'm immortal. I shall live for as long as universe and shit exist." He grabbed his dildo scepter and fired a glowing beam of shit from it at a table which exploded into a pile of shit. "I always dreamed of bringing shit to mankind. The only reason you live is so you may please the gladiatfags. Some enjoy women, and some enjoy bestiality. That is why we have cats and whores here today."
Shit Mage laid back down on shit-soaked sheets. Benny the cat walked out of the line-up and jumped on his lap.
"And who may I say pleases you," meowed Benny.
Shit Mage laughed and smacked Benny across the head.
"A man of your position should be ruling the world," meowed Benny.
"Sadly my kitty, even my shit powers are not strong enough," said Shit Mage.
Andy, Corey, Kevin, Rex, and Solofag sat in the jail cell and ate slop.
"You're eating the losers who are killed at the arena," said Solofag.
Andy, Corey, and Kevin dumped out their food, but Rex and Solofag continued gnawing at a man's penis. A door opened and a naked man walked in. He handed a cup in Solofag's hand and a cup in Rex's teeth.
"To the championfag," said the Fagician. "And the new challengefag."
"You're the challengefag," said Solofag to Rex. "I never had to fight a dog before."
Then Solofag and Rex were taken away. Benny was still entertaining the Shit Mage while the other women were gone.
"Shit Mage," purred Benny as he sat on the wizard's lap. "Have you ever thought of using science. You know, guns, bombs, nuclear weapons perhaps."
"The political tools of my world are piss, shit, fart, semen, gay men, sex slaves," said Shit Mage. "They are all more powerful than anything science has to offer."
Andy found some charcoal lying around the jail cell.
"Hey Kevin," said Andy. "We walked through a field to get here. Scrape your shoes for some potassium nitrate."
Kevin scraped saltpeter off his shoes. Corey scraped some sulfur off the floor. They jammed all of that in a lock because those ingredients make gunpowder.
"Who knows what unspeakable things they are doing to Rex," said Corey.
Rex and Solofag sat at a table in a room. They ate pizza with shit crust, cut up penis for pepperoni, semen for cheese, period blood for ketchup, and ass polyps for vegetables. They drank semen wine. Fagicians gave them a meal so they can build up their strength for gladiatfag battles. Next naked men brought out women before them. Solofag went first and chose Nikki. Rex chose a black and white cat. They got to have sex before the battle.
"Be careful with my pet cat," said Solofag.
Rex and Solofag went in separate rooms. Solofag stripped Nikki and kissed her. He touched her tits as she struggled and his dick went in her vagina. Rex the dog fucked a female cat. Rex's penis went in the cat's vagina.
Andy lit the gunpowder in the jail cell lock with a lighter. They ducked and there was an explosion which blew the door open. Kevin's freckly penis got licked by flames.
Shit Mage heard the explosion and came running into jail, followed by Benny, and naked men. He saw what Andy, Kevin, and Corey have done.
"Sexplain this to me," said Shit Mage.
"This is the meaning of using science against your enemies," said Benny.
"I knew I should've never consorted with the lower faggots," said Shit Mage.
There was a scream from Nikki's quarters. She has convinced Solofag to fight against the Fagicians. Naked men came running into the room. Solofag kicked them in the faces. Rex left the cat and came running out. Rex raped a high ranking Fagician up the ass. Nikki kicked them in the nuts. Rex swung on a guy's dick with his teeth. Nikki and Rex were grabbed and brought before Shit Mage with the others.
"Rex has had hot sex with and murdered the Centurion of the Empire," said a Fagician.
Trumpets blew in the arena as naked men gathered to watch the gladiatfag battle between Rex and Solofag. Shit Mage decreed if Rex loses, his friends die. Rex's friends (excepte Andy) were watching from the bleachers. Rex grabbed an axe in his teeth. Solofag came at him with a net and a sword. Solofag swung a sword at Rex. Rex cut Solofag's sexy body with an axe. Solofag kicked Rex in the testicles. He threw the net over Rex, trapped him and raised his sword. Rex shot piss out of his penis in his eyes. Rex cut through the net with an axe and jumped at Solofag. Two foes walked in front of each other. Solofag slashed cuts across Rex's sexy body who howled in sexy pain. Rex swung the axe with his teeth and cut off Solofag's penis. Solofag dropped dead as blood squirted out of him. Rex was victorious.
Andy was at a rock quarry with slaves. Naked men whipped Andy's sexy body. He collected saltpeter and made some gunpowder. He went running for the overthrow of Shit Mage's empire begins right now!
Rex stood victorious in the arena when a large sexplosion blew the gates open. Fagicians let go of Corey, Nikki, Benny the cat, and Kevin. Andy came running in. Slaves were set free. Slaves' penises penetrated the crusty shit on Fagicians' assholes. Shit Mage screamed in rage and fired shit beams. Rex was socked in the snout. Benny the cat was beat against a wall. Benny hung on men's testicles. Andy threw punches. Shit Mage came at Rex and fired magic shit beams at him from his dildo scepter. Rex's sexy body was caught in shit. Fagicians screamed war cries. Andy and Corey grabbed the gate and rammed the pointy ends of it into Fagicians' bodies against the wall. Shit Mage ran into his palace. Nikki went running naked through the arena. Nipples went flying off the men as Benny tore them off. The battle was over and dead men lay spread out.
Rex, Benny, Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin, all walked out of the empire into the forest. They watched smoke rise from the buildings. They went back home.
At night Shit Mage went riding on a horse though the forest toward Rimforest. He carried a small pouch of gunpowder with him. The world was his. But then he stopped, looked at how ridiculous this was, and went riding back. His moment will come and he will strike.
THE END