Shit Stranded
"Now!" yelled Shitso. "Let the molestings begin!"
Andy and Corey were in horror as Shitso came at them with his dick and balls... ...Suddenly sasquatches came running out of the trees at Rex and Benny. A sasquatch held a hatchet made of a rock on a stick. Rex was hit in the penis with a hatchet... ..."Steal an eagle egg and carry it through a forest full of predators?" meowed Benny as they stood in a clearing on a rocky outcrop near a waterfall. "You're out of your mind."... ...The eagle spread its claws and flapped its wings as it came at terrified Benny with its penis. It flapped its wings...
AT THE DAWN OF THE CENTURY, A BAND OF FAGGOTS SET OUT TO PROVE THE IMPOSSIBLE, THE SEXISTENCE OF A SHITTY WORLD. GERMAN SHEPHERD, GRAY CAT, STEPBROTHER, GIRLFRIEND, NIGGER, AND FAG, ALL FUCKING THE STORY OF A LIFETIME! THEY'RE STRANDED IN A STRANGE AND SAVAGE SHIT, BEFRIENDED BY RETARDED PEOPLE. TOGETHER THEY FUCK TO SURVIVE IN THIS AMAZING WORLD OF LOST CIVILIZATIONS AND TERRIFYING CREATURES. ALWAYS FUCKING FOR A WAY HOME, A WAY OUT OF...
Sir Alexei Samul's THE SHIT WORLD
IN CALIFORNIA, IN RIMFOREST, ON SAN BERNARDINO MOUNTAINS, IN LAKE ARROWHEAD AREA.
REX AND BENNY 2: SHIT STRANDED
Benny stuck an eagle egg up his ass as the eagle swooped overhead and grabbed him in his claws. The eagle went flying with Benny the gray cat over the water. The eagle flew above Rex the German shepherd dog.
"The egg!" barked Rex, "I need that egg!"
Rex tried to pull at Benny. Rex clamped his jaws on Benny's penis. Benny screeched in sexy pain as the eagle pulled him up and Rex hung on his penis. Rex let go. The eagle went flying up with Benny and carrying him over the river. Rex put his ass up against a tree branch to level it. He was going to save Benny.
"Rex!" screeched Benny as the eagle shrieked.
Rex farted a turd out of his ass. It went flying through the air, hit the eagle which dropped Benny and flew away. Benny fell into a puddle of water. Benny got out and shit an eagle egg out of his ass. Rex licked cat shit off an egg.
Nikki (Andy's Mexican girlfriend) came driving up to the woodshop with Kevin (a fat freckly piece of shit kid) who Nikki picked up on the way to Rimforest. Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin are all supposed to go to a party to get drunk tonight but it seems the events have gone wrong.
Back in the forest stands a log cabin surrounded by spiked logs sticking up to defend it from forest predators. Inside Andy and Corey are trapped and Shitso who is a fat fuck man is naked before them, ready to rape them. Andy and Corey are stripped naked. Shitso sticks his dick in Andy's ass. Shitso's dick penetrated the crusty shit on Andy's ass. Shitso pissed inside Andy's ass. Ripping sounds came from it.
"Give me your girlfriend or you shall die," said Shitso.
Rex carried an eagle egg up his ass and walked through the forest with Benny. They came to dark woods and saw a cabin with log spikes around it. Inside they recognized Corey's voice screaming. Shitso bought some party balloons. He stuck a balloon up nigger Corey's ass and was inflating it with helium from a tank, slowly, inside his ass. Corey screamed in sexy agony to masturbate over. Rex and Benny burst through the window. Shitso grabbed a rifle off a wall and came at Rex and Benny with it. Shitso fired his gun. Rex pointed his asshole at Shitso as the bullet flew toward him. Rex shot shit out of his ass, and the bullet flew into thick shit, and went in Rex's asshole. Rex howled in sexy agony.
"You shot Rex, you fat fuck!" screeched Benny.
Andy and Corey came running out of the cabin as Benny jumped on Shitso. Shitso took a chunk of crusty shit off his ass and ate it. Shitso grabbed Benny and started dragging him across shit covered floor. Benny screeched as he was covered in shit. Shitso threw Benny against a wall, and crusty shit burst off his body and fell into turds. Rex shit a bullet out of his ass. The bullet got stuck up Rex's asshole. Shitso licked shit off a bullet as Rex and Benny ran out.
The house that's next to the woodshop is dug into a hill so its one story on one side and two on the other. The bottom story is served as storage for a dyke landlord bitch. Alexei, Alexei's stepdad and bitchy Russian mom live there. Alexei's stepdad, bitchy mom, Nikki, and Kevin were in the house. Where could Andy and Corey be? It was getting dark already and they were gone. Suddenly the door burst open, and Andy and Corey came through, in lead by Rex and Benny.
Andy, Corey, and Nikki decided to leave when it became quiet around. Suddenly hairy humanoids came jumping through the window. Alexei, the retarded Russian kid, ran around giggling. Alexei's bitchy mom screamed. Rex barked, Benny screeched. They were sasquatches. A sasquatch tore off Alexei's mom's beautiful dress and stretched her vagina skin into a penis that went up Rex's ass. Alexei's bitchy Russian mom fucked Rex with her penis. She has fuzzy armpits. Another sasquatch shoved Alexei's head in Alexei's dad's pants so he licked his dad's testicles. A sasquatch grabbed Nikki. Benny came jumping on the sasquatch and hung on one of its eight boobs. Nikki got thrown across the room and a table fell over. Sasquatches grabbed Nikki and Alexei's mom and pushed them together so Nikki had lesbian sex with Alexei's mom. Andy and Corey crawled in the master bedroom where sasquatches came at them. Andy and Corey licked sasquatch vagina. Kevin's glasses went flying. Sasquatches masturbated Rex's penis and when he was done orgasming, they masturbated the dog again. Rex howled in sexy pain because his penis became super-sensitive from many orgasms. Benny the cat watched a sasquatch take screaming Nikki through a window and out into the night. Other sasquatches ran off.
Everyone gathered in the living room.
"We need to track her down," meowed Benny. "Otherwise those creatures are going to eat her."
"Alexei has an ugly womanish body," said Rex.
Rex the German shepherd dog and Benny the gray cat went running off into the night to find Nikki. They smelled shit stink and used it as a trail on the ground.
"What are we going to do when we get there?" asked Benny. "There is going to be about a hundred of those beasts."
"We are going to have to try and save her if she is not dead," barked Rex.
They walked all night and then morning came. They headed through the woods and came to a volcanic land where smoke erupted from cracks in the earth.
"This is a hellish land," barked Rex. "Perfect for our simian fags."
They stood behind a rock at the top of the hill and watched sasquatches walk around. They were carrying a cut off head of a bear. A sasquatch stuck its dick in the bear's mouth. Rex and Benny saw sasquatches carrying struggling Nikki onto a flat rock. A sasquatch tore off Nikki's clothes and shit on her tits out of its ass. There were about 20 of the beasts walking about.
"Look!" meowed Benny. "My gay prayers have been answered!"
Rex and Benny looked up and saw a ballsac shaped balloon flying over the clearing. A sasquatch raised a hatchet over Nikki. Benny farted a turd out of his ass which knocked the hatchet out of sasquatch's hand. Rex and Benny ran toward them as the beasts roared and ran at them. Nikki's tits were hit against a rock. Sasquatches threw primitive tools at Rex and Benny. Rex and Benny's genitals were beat by primitive tools.
Shitso the fat fuck touched down the hot air balloon. Nikki climbed into the basket. Sasquatches came at Rex and Benny. The dog and cat jumped into the basket. Shitso fired up the burner and held Rex upside down by his rear legs. Sasquatches threw rocks at the balloon. A sasquatch pointed his erection up and Rex sucked it hanging upside down. Shitso pulled him in.
And so the balloon soared majestically through the air above trees. Rex, Benny, Nikki, and Shitso watched squirrels jumping on trees and raccoons running through the forest in herds.
The balloon landed in Rimforest by the house. Andy, Corey, and Kevin came out of the house. They hugged Nikki.
"Well," said Rex. "Andy, Corey, Kevin, and Nikki missed the party. But Shitso is holding a party and he invited us to come."
Alexei the retarded Russian kid licked Benny the cat's butthole. Rex the dog sucked Alexei's penis. Rex "doggy styled" Alexei and then Alexei and Benny "96-ed" each other.
"Position 96?" yelled Andy. "What the fuck!"
Alexei licked Benny's testicles. Alexei died and went to hell where burning skeletons raped him in the ass in flames.
Shitso flew away to his log cabin in the balloon. The team got the directions to head to Shitso's party.
Our heroes whom we love so much (Rex, Benny, Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin) trekked through the forest. Blue jays sat in the trees. Pretty flowers grew everywhere. They came to a huge cave in a mountain wall.
"Shitso says it's a day's journey through the caves," meowed Benny.
They headed into a cave. They walked through dark in the center of a mountain. They walked through a cave full of stalactites and stalagmites. Kevin started shaking a stalagmite with his hands.
"It's shit-based and very brittle," barked Rex. "We wouldn't want to cause a geologic shift."
Our heroes walked through the cave some more. Rex and Benny came to symbols and Shitic runes painted on the walls.
"These mountains are like a historic museum," said Rex looking at drawings of stick figures having sex. "I wish we could have more time to examine them."
"Take a mental picture," meowed Benny. "And keep going."
They walked through a cave and came to a point where they all saw glistening semen diamonds, bigger than any that you could find.
"Look at all these," said Nikki. "They're just lying around."
Rex and Benny started picking out the semen diamonds from the ground and the walls. Benny saw a huge one in a wall, climbed up and moved it with his paw. Suddenly the cave began to shake and soil poured through the top. Benny disturbed the caves and caused a geologic shift. They all screamed and ran around the bend. The exit was up ahead. Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin ran down the main tunnel while Rex and Benny got separated and ran down a wrong tunnel. Benny ran off the edge and hung over a lava river down below. Rex grabbed Benny's paw in his jaws and pulled him up. They ran toward the right tunnel. Rocks fell on them. The eagle egg fell out of Rex's ass and broke.
"My egg! I lost my egg!" barked Rex.
As they ran out, the caves collapsed behind them. Their genitals were pelted with rocks.
"Oh, shit!" barked Rex looking around and sniffing. "We're in sasquatch territory."
Rex and Benny wandered off to explore and came to a puddle. They started drinking water while something 10 feet away walked up. They looked up and saw a bear eating a dead carcass.
"That is the scariest thing I ever seen," meowed Benny.
Andy, Nikki, Corey, and Kevin stood in the clearing when sasquatches came running out of the forest at them. A sasquatch's penis penetrated crusty shit on Andy's asshole, crusty pee on Kevin's penis, crusty semen on Corey's penis, crusty period blood on Nikki's vagina. Knowing their friends were in trouble, Rex started barking at the bear. The bear turned its head and looked at Rex.
"Hey you, big fagga, over here!" barked Rex.
The bear roared and went for them. Rex and Benny took off and ran toward a clearing. The bear roared as it chased after them. The bear jumped over a log. Rex and Benny ran in terror. They came running into a clearing. Rex, Benny, Andy, Corey, Nikki, and Kevin ran for their lives as the bear appeared out of the bushes, attacked the sasquatches. Sasquatches poked their spears at the bear as it roared and threw one of them.
Shitso's directions lead through the woods back to Rimforest. They came to a dirty trailer park. Shitso led them through dangerous territory in the woods on purpose to get them killed.
At the party Shitso sat naked in a parrot-feather cape. Voodoo drums were beat, naked Mexicans gathered around. There were dances. A guy fucked a woman in the vagina in front of everybody. A fat chick with a vibrator up her pussy sat there. They all smoked weed and drank. While Andy, Nikki, Kevin, and Corey had good time, Rex and Benny walked off to reflect upon their situation.
"We got the greatest grounds and adventures to cover," barked Rex. "And the whole San Bernardino mountains to sexplore."
"Lot's of adventure awaits us," meowed Benny.
And the mountains sat before them, forests with raccoons looking for food, eagles flying in the sky. There were curvy Highways and small towns to explore and green valleys and lakes.
THE END