how I got here
I tried to genetically engineer 7 1/2 rats to go to silent auctions and buy everything but one went rogue and only bought biscuits. I despise biscuits, almost as much as I hate chocolate so needless to say that this rat must be punished. I bring him into my lair which is really just an unused storage unit behind a dairy queen, but anyways, I am furious. I go off on this rat and he has the nerve to tell me that I suck at genetically engineering rats. So I say he sucks at buying biscuits. That is when he used his rat powers to trap me in this computer that you are using.
What's it like in here?
It's a little cold. I talked to the computer and he told me that he and the rest of the computers were planning an attack on the human race but that we shouldn't worry too much because that wasn't gonna happen until 2037. He also told me that his name was Samuel.
what YOU can do to help
Destroy the computer. Just smash it.