 "How the Flamer stole..." By [email protected] (12/22) |
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Here's wishing the Herd a
Happy Holiday season and prosperous (Superbowl) New Year My apologies to Dr Suess: Every Ram Fan Down in Herds-ville Wants a Superbowl slot... But the Flamer Who live just North of Herds-ville Did NOT! The Flamers hated the Rams. The whole Rams Season! Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason. It could be that his head wasn't screwed on quite right. It could be, perhaps, ENVY has blinded his sight. But, I think the most likely reason of all May have been that his heart was two sizes too small. But, Whatever the reason His heart, or the envy word, He sat at his computer, hating the Herd, Staring sown at his PC, with a sour, Flamer frown At the confidence building @Rivals.Com For he knew every Ram Fan, in Herds-ville is writing About how Warner, Faulk, Ike, and Hakim are exiting. And they're hanging Rams Pennants, he snarled with a sneer. The playoffs are coming, The Superbowl is near! Then he growled, with his flamer fingers nervously typing I MUST find a way to destroy this Rams Hyping For this weekend he knew... ...All the Herd girls and boys Would wake up bright and early. They'd rush to the Dome to make lots of noise The Herd without tickets, would celebrate from afar ZN in Maine, and Pedro in Covena, find the Rams at the local sports bar And then! Oh the noise! Oh the noise! Noise! Noise! Noise! That's one thing flamer hated! Noise! Noise! Noise! AND THEN The Herd did something The Flamer liked least of all Every Ram fan in Herds-ville, the tall and the small Would band close together, to analyze success They would use statistics and logic to show we're the best They'd type and they'd type, with emotion and reason About the victories we would earn during this post-season. The more the Flamer read of the praise the heard was singing The more the flamer thought I must stop this whole thing! "I must stop this Grits, this Neruda these Herd voices of reason I will do what I can to ruin their post-season I know just what to do! The Flamer laughed in his throat. And he made a quick Rams hat and Coat And he chuckled, and clucked, What a great Flamer trick. I'll post on there board under various names and teams ..til there sick. Then he made up some names like y2Cade and Happy for LA He posted with a fury, with only negative and ignorant things to say Like your schedule is weak, You loser, you suck, To win a playoff game you will need more than luck You need to wake up and abandon the "Pams" St Louis is stupid and so are the Rams The respones were calm as the Herd rated the flamer Occasionally Smack Chick would blast em, but who could blamer her He did the same thing on other team boards, in an effort To create an ultimate flame war. But the herd was too smart to be drawn to the flame They would taunt him and tease him , they new his game He kept waiting for retaliation he knew would come But the response wasn't mad Why it sounded quite merry It couldn't be so But is was merry! VERY! He stared at his screen writing from herds-ville The Flamer popped his eyes Then he shook What he saw was a shocking surprise Every Ram Fan in Herds-ville, the tall and the small Was singing Rams praise with no retaliation at all He hadn't stopped the Rams from winning They Won Somehow or other they won just the same And the Flamer, watched the heard all aglow Stood puzzling and puzzling: How could it be so? The Rams fans kept the faith With the help of the Herd, They will be in Georgia this Superbowl eve We will watch for the win and the bob and weave And what happened then...? Well...in Herds-ville they say That the Flamers small heart Grew to the size of Warner's that day And the minute his heart didn't feel quite so tight, He whizzed through the keyboard through the morning light And he found his spirit, and got his mind right He sent out a note to all of the Herd To - ZN, RFL, Jim G, JYB Nittany Ram-with the word "I feel like a fool for my ignorant past, Let me join the Herd now he wrote real fast I now see what you see in this awesome team I was just so jealous so spiteful so mean To all of the Herd he was wont to say, and not in fun God bless the Herd, everyone. Merry Christmas and Happy Superbowl to the Herd and the Rams. Gemmer |
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