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Doctors, lawyers,
and accountants live like kings (and queens) while copy editors are left
to cross their t's.
The problem is clarity: Copy editors,
by virtue of their trade, are too well understood.
THIS
IS THE MANUAL THAT WILL CHANGE
ALL THAT!
Think! If people easily understand
what you are paid to produce, then they are going to wonder why they are
paying you as much as
they do.
If, on the other hand, they don't
grasp a word that comes out of your mouth (see doctors, lawyers, and accountants),
then they will think you have some specialized and elite knowledge that
warrants a house in Beverly Hills and, of course, a BMW.
Though the thick volumes that
archive our trade knowledge hold just as many important- and foreign-sounding
words as those texts of the other professions (words like pluperfect,
subjunctive,
and encyclopedia), these very volumes ensure that the general public
will be able to understand the end product with little more effort than
they spend watching TV.
THIS IS
WHERE RALPH'S MANUAL
OF STYLE
COMES IN.
Ralph's Manual of StyLe (RMS)
is guaranteed to confuse even those with multiple Ph.D.'s. Once the publishing
world turns to RMS, people will have to hire a copy editor just to interpret
their TV guides
for them.
So throw away all the other books
that litter your shelves and follow Ralph's (RMS) exclusively, and in no
time at all, you will be able to afford a BMW, a Beverly Hills home, and
possibly even the services of a doctor,
a lawyer, or
an accountant.
--Ralph
Disclaimer
Don't try this at
the office.
Copyright, 2000
All Rights Reserved
For
information on copyrights, E-mail:
E-mail
[email protected]
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Previews
Numbers
Words or Numerals
Write out all numbers between one and sixty-seven point three two,
with THIRTY-FOUR through FORTY-SIX
set in small caps. For numbers above sixty-seven point three two, numerals
should be used, preferably Arabic, though Lydian numerals look stylish
with certain oldstyle typefaces. (Call your Adobe dealer today to order
your copy of Garamond with Lydian numerals.) StyLe
Guide, Numbers
Usage Samples
compare to vs. with
Use compare to when likening something to a summer’s day and
compare with for all other uses.
A: Hey, Fred! Compare thee new
Buick to a summer’s day!
B: Gee, Ralph, it’s a good thing
you didn’t say compare with,
or you would have really been
in trouble.
Usage Guide, Samples
Under Construction
Ralph's StyLe Guide
The whole kit and . . . whatever
1. Punctuation!
2. CapitaliZation
3. Abbrev.
4. Speling
5. #'s
6. "Quotations"
7. Documentation*
8. Foreign Languagitos
9. DesigN & Type
Ralph's Usage Guide
The difinitive guide to usage, common grammatical
mistakes, and turnips. With Ralph's Usage Guide, you'll be able to write
paragraphs like the one below.
Sitting across the room, it looked to him and I like
it was going to be a long, lonely, distasteful evening, and problem night.
More importantly, as a comic strip artist I was bound to compare what I
was seeing to the many lessons of my stories in order to quickly find the
differences, due to my ever imaginative mind. Hopefully, I had reckoned
wrong about all this, but, the fact was, was that I likely had not. The
fact that I thought so was proven.
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Sections
Numbers 101
Usage Guide
Grammar
capitalization
Punctuation!!!
Business$$$
Foreign
Language
Under Construction
Ralph's
First International Dictionary of the English Language
Corrections
Please report any mistakes or errors. Once reported,
they will promptly be listed in the "Exceptions to Common Grammar, Usage,
and Spelling Rules" section of Ralph's Usage Guide.
About Ralph
Although Ralph's Web site is already partially up and
running, Ralph himself is still under construction. We apologize for any
inconvenience.
Production
Note
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The fine print: Ralph's Manual of Style is a
manual for editing, for editors, publishers, college students who need help with
editing and who might one day want to publish their work, copy editors,
subeditors, readers, researchers, copy editors who need help with their
copyediting, copy editors who do not need help with their editing, copy editors
who think they do not need help with their editing but actually do need help
with their editing, production editors, art editors who work with type, type
editors who work with art, people who do not understand that the the verb
"edit" is a back formation form the noun editor, which itself is
derived from a Latin term which is spelled and probably pronounced something
like the noun editor, people from New Jersey who need help with their editing,
editors who would like to move to New Jersey where parking is easier, editors
who would like to move to New Jersey because the pay is higher, editors who edit
because they like editing, editing experts who edit because editing is the only
thing they can think about while editing, non-editors who do not know when to
hyphenate materials they are editing, editing professionals, newspaper editors,
magazine editors, book editors, editors of those long stuffy medical papers,
journal editors, video editors, text editors, research editors, comic book
editors, lay editors, grade one editors, top-grade editors, sports editors, news
editors, city-desk editors, New York Times editors, New York Post editors,
International Herald Tribune editors, Seattle Times editors, Japan Times
editors, Straits Times editors, Bangkok Post editors, Washington Post editors,
Wall Street Journal editors, editors with large ears, editors with two noses,
people who edit large ears and dual noses, people who spell edit EDIT, people
who spell edit EDITTE, editors who edit for style manuals, style manuals written
for people who edit for style manuals, people who edit style manuals that are
written for people who edit style manuals, editors who edit style manuals
for people who edit style manuals for people who edit style manuals,
editors who write those tiny senseless words at the bottom certain Web
pages, editors who edit style manuals for editors who write those tiny senseless
words at the bottom of certain Web pages . . .1editing is to the editor what
editing is not to other people other than editors, especially editors who edit
for the simple sake of editing, for to edit to an editor is not what to
edit is to people other than editors who like to edit so much that they hang
aroundthe house on Sundays and writ insane littl lsdjf;js;ajd;sfkdj;sfkdj;fjd; ;asfj
fdj fjd s;afj fjjd s;afj fjd ;afjd s;af
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