BrainThoughts2

4/23/01
Heidi-ho there, neighbor. I'm back after my brief retirement. So, yes indeedy do, I don't have much to say here, but I want to start doing this again. More links coming soon, and perhaps some quotes and literature. Look back every five minutes.

Sign my damned guestbook! I feel unloved.

Ah, the wonder that is standardized testing. I'm so lucky that I get to experience it. These tests are an insult to my intelligence. The language section sounds like it was written by an extremely intoxicated Yoda:
     Choose the sentence that is written the most clearly and correctly.
     a) Bob and I went to the store. Bob and I bought some milk.
     b) Bob and I, going to the store we were. And buying milk.
     c) Milk, it was bought when Bob and me, we went to the store.
     d) Bob and I went to the store and bought some milk.
If this is supposed to measure our generation's collective intelligence, we are really fucked as a country. In the future. If this stupid we and us are being.

On a related story, I read an article about how that irritating game show The Weakest Link had to be severly dumbed down for and American audience. How sad.

Speaking of American stupidity, I love British censors. I occasionally watch the original British version of Whose Line is it Anyway?, and although it is not nearly as funny as its American counterpart, they are able to get away with so much more. It's fantastic.

4/27/01
Fuck yeah! I just got my driver's licence! But I almost didn't...bum bum bum. (That's dramatic-sounding music, if you couldn't tell.) I was doing okay until I had to back up right next to the curb. I went a little farther than the DMV lady told me to, and just as she tells me to stop, CHGNRXHH! I hit the damn curb. At that point I was sure I had failed, so I wasn't as perfect and careful for the rest of the test as I should have been. But the nice DMV lady gave me "the benefit of the doubt" and passed me anyway. Yay! But since I was so preoccupied with kicking myself after the curb incident, I missed a lot of points. I got an 89. The lowest you can pass with is an 85, so I was really cutting it close. But I passed, and I am a happy camper. Or driver. Definitely driver. I don't really like camping.

6/6/01
Okay, I'm back. I went away for a while, but I'm here now. Did you miss me? First things first. This is for Kirsten: EXTENTION CORD! And this is for me: NOUGAT! Mine is bigger. Ha ha.
Well, what else is new here? I am almost out of school! I need to go to the store and buy more. No, school ends tomorrow. I am so happy. You know why else I am happy? I get a car! Yay! Anyway, I think this wins an award for the longest time without updating this. Maybe if I stopped putting dates on it no one would notice. Maybe not. Not that anyone really reads this. Except Kirsten, so I gave her the wonderful gift of EXTENTION CORD! That's all for now. Maybe I'll add some stuff later. In the summer. When I'm not in school. I'm really glad it's summer vacation, if you hadn't already gotten that impression. Bye now.

7/1/01
well, i'm back again, finally, and i've given up on the charade of capital letters. too much of a hassle. it's an homage to e.e. cummings or k.d. lang or someone else who hasn't yet discovered the caps lock button. why do the lowercase people have initals instead of first names? maybe i should start calling myself e.m. o'donnell. then again, maybe not.

i have shared some fab five slang (by slang i mean they aren't really words and no one knows what the hell we are talking about when we use them) with a small portion of the computer-literate world: those that have nothing better to do and happen to find pseudodictionary.com. i am the proud contributor of the "words" frap and bast.

1/5/01
go to lunch. go to lunch. no, really, i'm not joking. go to lunch. i just saw kevin spacey tell...i forgot who, another actor at any rate, to go to lunch 3 times. glengarry glen ross, a lovely movie based on a lovely (well i assume it's lovely, i've never seen it) play by david mamet. a little slow to start, but it picked up. good movie. see it. see it. no really, i'm not joking. see it.

on a related note...
"i can't stand to be asked the same question three times. it just drives me crazy!"
"where is dr. evil?"
"i'll never tell you!"
"where is dr. evil?"
"i spit at the question!" :spits:
"where is dr. evil?"
"in his secret hideout in the hollowed out volcano."
hehe, gotta love austin powers.

also:
if you can think of any good reason why hotel california would be running through my head when i woke up this morning, please let me know. because it's really starting to worry me.