My musings on the world that surrounds and astonds me. For February, 2000
Feb 10, 2000
I love my job. I really do. I like giving people work, I like that my company does little things for me like gives me Opera tickets.
Oh, the Opera tickets. Mike and I went to see Camille Saint Saens Sampson et Delilah. It was very good. The sets were totally lavish, black and gold and marbley green. As has been in my experience with the Omaha Opera, the Soprano was great, and the tenor was okay. We don't get your Caruso types here in the middle of nowhere.
But, I hate the fact that the company I work for is full of people that pidgeonhole you into an image of the person you were when you started. When I started I had little direction, I had no idea what I was doing, and I didn't understand the importance of process.
Now, I have all those things, but many people will always see me as the confused and overwhelmed person I was when I first came to this company.
That's life I suppose. You run into those things in all aspects of it. Hobbies, subculture, even in your home life. I don't always appreciate the changes my husband has gone through since we met, or even since we married. But I know he controls his temper better, he listens better, and he tries to be more considerate now than before.
Maybe because humans aren't good with change. We don't really welcome it, even when we say we do, so we don't recognize it in others. Ooh...that means me too.
February 16, 2000
My biggest problem is that I get very aggressively opinionated and that is so bitchy. I really think if I could either not share my opinions, or share them in a less threatening manner I'd really benefit myself.
Now, I have to figure out how to do that and do it consistantly. No one likes a bitch. I know that saying you are a "bitch" and such is considered funny or cute or something, but who really wants to spend time with someone who is nasty?
Another aspect of this goes back to the people don't let you change concept. I may put in a ton of effort to be a kinder and nicer person, but will people ever give me credit for it, or simply notice when I am being a bitch? We'll have to see.
Archive
My first step in becoming a better person is to spend more time in actual introspection. I'm cheating a little, since I'm combining this with my workout and Tai Chi.
But I heard on NPR this morning the the bike messengers in DC have a mag dedicated just to their poetry and art. So time spent in active workout introspection is good!