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A Brief History Of Phroth
FOX Names Satan As Newest Producer
By Luke Davin
In an attempt to plumb new lows in television morality, Fox recently named Satan as their newest producer. Fox executives defended their choice of the Prince of Darkness: "Satan, as you will see, is not only about trapping your soul in everlasting torment," said Sandy Grushow, chairman of the Fox Television Entertainment Group. "Satan is at the forefront of development in the dynamics of lust, mistrust and moral depravity in prime-time programming. We wanted a new point of view. Satan gives us that."
Added Grushow, "He should also really help us connect with the key 18-24 demographic."
Satan's first proposals for new programming include "The Last Temptation of Christ Island," "Who Wants to Be Rent Asunder by a Pack of Demon-Hounds," and "Sodomy Night Live." The premise of "Temptation..." is to clone Jesus Christ from the Shroud of Turin and place him on an island with thirteen prostitutes named Mary. Jesus has six weeks to decide whether he wants to go through with his crucifixion or live out the rest of his life on the island. "Temptation of Christ Island" is set to replace current Fox super-hit "Temptation Island" which, despite an opening night draw of 16 million viewers, was described by network executives as, "...[S]till having some traces of redeeming moral value."
The American Family Association, a conservative watchdog group, has already urged its followers to protest the show, and a Dallas-Fort Worth rabbi asked his local station not to air it.
"Satan should be ashamed of himself for trying to bring about the corruption of our saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ, for the entertainment of the low-lifes who consent to watch this trash," said Brent Bozell, founder of the Parents Television Council.
As part of the deal that brought the Morningstar to Fox from his frozen pit of despair, the network agreed to send an interim Dark Lord to rule Hell in his stead. While Lucifer is on Earth, redefining tastelessness and immorality, Aaron Spelling is taking over the nether-realms, using concepts of moral depravity he developed on the set of "Beverly Hills 90210." Said Spelling, "This is just the break I've been looking for. A change of scenery might be just what I need to recharge my creative batteries. Maybe a new show about the tawdry lives of teenage jet-setters..."
