Although it will very likely appear readily apparent to the reader what is denoted by a “big word”, for didactic purposes, I will nonetheless render a definition of the term as used in this essay. A “big word” is a choice of diction incomprehensible to the majority of one’s peer group. A related term, “big words” is a combination of vocabulary and style characterized by literary sophistication. For example, if you say, “I like the idea of categorical imperatives”, people will exclaim, “Wow, that’s a big word!” But, if instead, you proclaim, “Categorical imperatives furnish the a priori foundation for ethical reasoning”, they will probably stare at you blankly for five seconds and then, as if recovered from a paroxysm, utter, “Wow, you use big words!” Quite obviously, the implementation of “big words” as opposed to a “big word” produces a much larger impact upon your audience. If you assiduously attend to the following points, you will wax so adept at their usage as to encounter interminable supplications to either “Stop using big words!” or “Please let’s restrict ourselves to two syllables.”

Before we proceed, one ought to distinguish between two types of intellectual discourse: the literary and the scientific. They are not mutually exclusive and a skillful big word user may very well be proficient in incorporating both into his or her language, but the literary depends more upon sampling a wide range of literature, while the scientific requires delving into the technical aspects of a particular field. Both types harbor their advantages and this essay will expound on both.

The best way to write or speak well is to read well. As preparation for your first field exercise, read up on some poetic prose. Your rule of thumb here is the more ornate, the better. Devote a significant amount of time to carefully dissecting the structure and meaning of each sentence. Personally, I would recommend any work by Nabokov or a circuitous Victorian novelist like Dickens. Now you’re ready to test your newly developed skills. The crucial maxim is never, ever consciously over-exert yourself, unless you wish to see your effort fall flat on its face. I strongly suggest first practicing your fluidity online, where you will be afforded substantially more time to formulate effective sentences. Once you feel ready, progress onto the real world. Feel free to mimic the style of those authors you read. Lend flavor by interspersing your more mundane remarks with French phrases ... comme il faut, raison d’�tre, etc. All the while, overwhelm your audience with your profound insights or a careful philosophical analysis. And when you receive gapes of perplexion, gasp and simulate genuine concern, “Oh, I’m truly sorry; I’d hate to permit my peculiar verbal affectations to obstruct effectual comprehension.”

       

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