| " I had a chicken once. It didn't lay eggs. It was too young, and it didn't have anyone to lay eggs with." - Betty "Betty, chickens don't need anyone else to lay eggs." - Me "Lovet!" - Tim "I think we're soul mates Becca." - Tim "Can you take this exam for me? I'll pay you. I have a lot of money. Pleeeeease." - Tim "I have a little Buddha on my desk. He's funny. He just sits there all day with his little nap sack of weed and his cup of booze. He loves it." - Tim "Why does it sound like there's a hampster in the phone." - Monique "I had coffee, and coffee is bad for Mo. And then I had skittles and skittles are sugar." - Monique (while bouncing up and down in the middle of the room) "Sometimes I think about life and then, I eat cheese." - Chad "I have the strangest dreams, what kind of toothpaste do you use?" - Rebecca K. (no, not me the *other* Rebecca K. I know, this is getting ridiculous.) "Can they rape our rooms? And what should we do with the keg in our fridge?" - Micah to the RA "Why would you want an *arm* chair without arms?" - Me "That's like having a sky-diver without a parachute." - Monique "I'd go around grabbing more asses if there weren't such serious repercussions." - Courtney "He dances around his main focal point like it's a frikken bonfire." - Me "...Amniotic semi-conductors..." - random guy in dining hall "Are they making robots out of pregnant women over there?" - Monique "If I had a dick, I'd jump you." - Darlene "If I find out that you've been around here and didn't stop by, there's going to be hell to pay." - Tim "Can we clone him? Everyone needs a Tim." - Monique "If I didn't have Becca I would die!" - Monique "Me too." - Tim "Do they talk about that, cuz I'd like to have sex with a swordfish." - Tim "They're headed straight into the smire fomp." - Monique "There was flying blood and chunks of burning blubber...I would have loved it." - Tim "You would have run around naked." - Monique "Yeah I would." - Tim "Anyone care to conjure a guess?" - Monique "Marble berry wood stove store?" - Diana "Oooh, a semicolon; I love to use semicolons. They seem so much more intelligent than commas." - Me "What's Justin Timberlake's last name?" - Chad "With the quickness..." - Tim "Do you shine your pants?" "I do shine my pants." - everybody "I hate chain letters with the passion of a thousand flaming stars." - Me "If beer was a girl, I'd have sex with her like that. *snaps fingers* Oh, mark my words...If they turned beer into a girl." - Tim "*cough*Kevin*cough*" - Tim as food spews from his mouth. "It was bangin�. Bangin'. I slid under a car, but it was still awesome." - Diana after sledding down the hill "I went sledding without a bra on." - Tim P. "My parents hated him so much that one day, he played scrabble with us, and later, my mom washed the pieces." - Monique "Oh God, I just stepped on Jesus." - Monique "Doughnuts, real doughnuts. I'm going to put my life on hold." - random kid in the dining hall "Go hose off your friend." - Tim "Arglemuffins." - LeighAnn "Remind me when I get up to google for flying toasters." - Monique "I'll explain it later in a dream that you'll have about me painting your ceiling." - Heath "I'm pretty sure I'll be cooking every day." - Me "I'm pretty sure I'll be eating all your food." - Darlene "I'm pretty sure I'll be telling you what to put in that food." - Brigette "I'm pretty sure I won't be listening." - Me |