| *It's Day 64 in the Amazon Rainforest. It's the final day of this long journey. The two finalists, Bob and Lex, just finished making their final statements to the jury. Joseph takes back control of the Tribal Council!!!!* Joseph: Well, well, well!!! Very good questions and very good answers. This is the Final Tribal Council of The Best Survivor on the Net Season Ever!!!!! So, the producers and I thought and we decided we'd make it very special. So.... Lex: Oh! Please don't tell me.... another Jared appearance!? Joseph: You guessed it Lex!!! About 20 days ago, there was a Tribal Council in which there was supposed to be a wrestling match. It never happened. Over contract disputes and time conflicts, for you final 9's entertainment, this will be a wrestling match TO DECIDE WHO WILL BE THE FUTURE MASCOT OF SURVIVOR ON THE NET!!! The producers don't mind who wins, because really this is just a May Sweeps Ratings Stunt! But seriously, it is out of our control who wins! Jared has just as much of a chance to be the next mascot as the NetSpider Monkey has to continue being the mascot! So without further delay, I'll trot over to this wrestling ring, which has been set up in the Tribal Council area! I'll announce the entire thing for you.... Bob: *whispering to Lex* This should be fun! Joseph's so obsessed with the Subway spokesperson, the future SOTN hosts will be forced to say, "The Jared Has Gotten You and Eaten You!" *Lex snickers. The jury's emotions are mixed. Some of them are laughing and having a good time at this stupid display of Joseph's imagination. Others are deep in thought about their votes, as you can tell that they're still undecided.* Joseph: Alright, let's welcome our two contestants to the ring!!!! The challenger, weighing in at 210 pounds, but really 350 if you count the weight taken off by the digital camera..... JARED!!!!! *Jared trots out, acting all big and tough. While climbing into the ring, he trips and falls on his face.* Joseph: The champion, the current mascot for the first 5 seasons of Survivor on the Net, weighing in at 45 pounds, the beast of the east, THE NETSPIDER MONKEY!!! *The netspider monkey rides to the ring on a giraffe! A giraffe? YES! A GIRAFFE!!! The monkey hops into the ring and goes to its corner! Jared starts to rub his stomach like he's going to eat it!* Joseph: And now introducing the guest referee for the match-up.... the big daddy of SOTN himself, ZEB!!!!! *Zeb comes out with a striped shirt on. He climbs into the ring and the match begins...* Joseph: And the match begins!!! *I just said that!* Joseph: Anyways.... Jared starts off trying to crush the monkey with his foot! The monkey runs frantically around the ring, and Jared, being slow can't catch him! The monkey sneaks up behind Jared and climbs on his back! Jared shrieks like a girl as the monkey bites Jared's ear!!!! IT'S MIKE TYSON ALL OVER AGAIN!!!! HOLY COW!!!! OH MY GOODNESS! JARED FAINTED FROM THE BITE AND FELL ON ZEB, THE HOST!! THIS IS BAD! I'll be right back.... *Joseph slides into the ring and tries, with no avail, to pull Jared off of Zeb. Eventually, with the help of a few of the jurors, he does! Zeb, almost suffocated, is ok! The netspider monkey pins Jared!!!!* Joseph: THE NETSPIDER MONKEY MAY PULL THIS OFF! 1.....2...... OH MY GOODNESS! JARED IS ALIVE! DARN IT!!!! Jared gets up with anger as he continues to chase the monkey. Eventually, he pulls a Subway sandwich out of his pocket, and sets it down. The monkey takes the bait and he comes to get it! JARED GRABS THE MONKEY AND PUTS HIM BETWEEN TWO PIECES OF BREAD! ZEB IS BEGGING JARED NOT TO EAT THE MONKEY! OH MY GOODNESS! THIS IS GONNA GET NASTY..... HEY JARED! THAT MONKEY IS FULL OF MORE THAN 7 FAT GRAMS!! Good... I made Jared think and he put the monkey back down.... but now, OH MY GOODNESS! HE'S SITTING ON HIM!!!!!! Zeb tries to get him to get off, but Jared just pushes Zeb down, knocking Zeb out! Jared is calling for me to come make the 3-count, but I can't do it!! WAIT WHAT IS THIS!!!!! *All of a sudden, a masked short person comes out of the Amazon River, IS IT THE SWAMP THANG!!!!?? The masked creature has a guitar, AND IT SMASHES IT OVER THE HEAD OF JARED!!!!!* Joseph: What the [BLEEP] IS GOING ON?! THIS IS CRAZIER THAN ANYTHING I COULD HAVE WRITTEN! THE JURY AND THE FINAL 2 ARE WONDERING WHAT IS GOING ON!!!! THE CREATURE HAS ON A STRIPED SHIRT! THE MONKEY IS ALIVE! THE MONKEY PINS JARED!!!! 1.......2........3!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY COW! THE MONKEY DID IT! THE MONKEY DID IT!!!!! BUT WHO IS THIS CREATURE!!!!!??? *Joseph approaches the short creature, which is about 1/4 of Joseph's size!!!!* Joseph: Take off your mask!! Zeb: *coming to* Yes! Who are you that saved this prestigious show from a loser like Jared? Joseph: WHO ARE YOU? *The creature unmasks itself and....* Lex and Bob: You've gotta be kidding me!!!! Joseph: OH MY FRICKIN UNCLE! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS SAVED THE MONKEY!!!! *Joseph puts the monkey on his shoulder, and Zeb puts Spongebob himself on his shoulder!* Joseph: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN..... SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS HAS HELPED THE NETSPIDER MONKEY REMAIN AT ITS POSITION AS SURVIVOR ON THE NET MASCOT! WE'VE GOTTA GO TO A COMMERCIAL!!!!!! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Survivor on the Net IV Season Finale is brought to you by..... Oxyclean! If it's not Oxygen and it's not clean, then it's not Oxyclean!!!! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- *The SOTN IV Season Finale continues as we see Joseph standing back at a normal Tribal Council setting. The wrestling ring is gone. The monkey is gone. Jared is gone. Spongebob is gone! Zeb is sitting between the jury and the final 2!* Joseph: Alright, that was a bunch of crazy stuff, but before we get to the revelation of the votes, which will be the conclusion of the show, I'd like to say a few final words about this game! This game has been the longest SOTN yet! It has also been the best!!!!! These 62 days have been nothing but entertaining and has kept everyone on the edge of their seat! I would also say that these are the best two finalists ever! Let's look at how this game has evolved. It began with two tribes of 7 in the desert. The game, which only lasted a month, was an immediate hit despite some boring contestants. The finalists didn't disappoint though, as two best friends fought for the prestige of being the first ultimate Survivor on the Net! The final Tribal Council was thrilling as Blake beat Tiffany by 3 votes to 2!! After the first season, the 2nd season was even better! Set in the mountains, two tribes of 8 fought. When the dust, fighting, and backstabbing controversy had cleared, Joel and Mary Jo were the two finalists. In yet another thrilling ending, Joel won 5-2!!!! With the third season came a lot of change!!! Tammy, the co-founder and main host of the first 2, retired. Mary Jo, the runner-up from SOTN II, hosted as Zeb continued to produce. SOTN III brought friendships, enemies, and controversies as Aurora defeated Will in the tightest vote to date, 4 votes to 3 in Iceland!!!! SOTN's popularity rose even more after that. So many applications came pouring in that there had to be two SOTN seasons running silmulataneously. Zeb could only do one, so he became the consultant for Season 5 as Sebastian, a contestant from SOTN III, hosted and produced it. That game is in the final 4 right now and I'd like to congratulate all of them. As for SOTN IV, we all know how that has gone. Zeb has continued to produce award-winning games and Joseph, myself a jury member from SOTN III, hosted it that brought an aspect to the SOTN series that was never present before, crazy creativity! Put that creativity with the mystical Amazon Rainforest, and throw in the most powerful 16 contestants ever in a SOTN season, and you've got a winner! For 64 days, you guys have fought it out. Now we have the best of the best, Lex and Bob, as the finalists! What they have done to this point is amazing. They beat out 14 other people, including the 7 of you jurors! Now their power is all gone. They've played their cards, but now they have to see how it turns out. The 7 of you will now reveal your votes for who will be crowned the 4th Ultimate Survivor on the Net!! Good Luck to you Bob and Lex! Without further delay...... let's do this thing...... AFTER A COMMERCIAL BREAK!!!! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Survivor on the Net IV is brought to you by..... the new movie "The Scorpian King" If you haven't seen it, then you better not tell anyone you have!!!! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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The Beginning of the End... |
| Final Days 61-64 4/25/02 thru 4/28/02 |
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| It's time to find out who the Ultimate Survivor on the Net IV in the Amazon is! CLICK HERE TO SEE THE FINAL TRIBAL COUNCIL RESULTS! |
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