Julia Schaun, Pine Oaks Book Club Co-Chair
Hello, fellow Pine Oaks book lovers. Apparently, despite numerous mentions in last month�s Community Newsletter, many of you still managed to show up on the wrong day. While I appreciate your enthusiasm for reading, what I do not appreciate is when you barge into my house unannounced, forage through my refrigerator looking for sustenance, and demand to discuss books. I mean, honestly. Book Club discussions are for the designated time and day, and no other. Particularly not on the night when my husband Mark and I had tickets to the theater. I told you people at last month�s meeting, I put it on the calendar, and I even mentioned it in the column. Book Club was moved off of the usual day and pushed to later in the month. But no, you people just had to talk about the book that night, didn�t you? Now Mark and I have to wait until Shear Madness is in town again, and who knows when that will be? Shame on all you. It�s just books, books, books, that�s all you think about. Except for when you�re thinking about how to be as annoying as possible. Well you know what? Congratulations, you succeeded. They held an awards ceremony the other day, and the Pine Oaks Book Club won for Biggest Group of Assholes. And Terry, the book club is not a place where you can talk about who made you upset that week. Yes, we know, pedestrians have the right of way. That doesn�t mean you can spend twenty minutes complaining about the bicyclist who rode by �at a dangerously high speed,� as you claim, right as you were about to step off of the curb. You made it across the street, didn�t you? Much to everyone�s chagrin. I hope you get hit by a bus. And Barbara, I want to personally thank you for all you�ve done. The hours you�ve spent making sure there are always a host and a discussion leader, inviting new members, writing this column - it�s really helped make the Pine Oaks Book Club great. Oh wait, I do all that. At least your Founder�s Day events went off without a hitch. Well, except for the historically low attendance. And the pathetic parade. And the food poisoning. And the huge fire. Why don�t you just go back to your tax write-off, I mean your charity, and think about how everyone hates you.
Next month�s discussion is on James Joyce�s Ulysses. Try not to choke on it.
Give it a rest already,
Julia Schaun
Fighting Spirit...p. 4
Neighborhood Watch...p. 4
Message from the President...FRONT
Pine Oaks Book Club...p. 3
Welcome Wagon...FRONT
This Month in Pine Oaks...FRONT
Young Person's Perspective...p. 5