*AFI

*Anti-Flag

*Bad Religion

*Black Flag

*Circle Jerks

*Cramps

*Crass

*Dead Kennedys

*Descendents

*Dwarves

*Exploited

*Fugazi

*Minor Threat

*Misfits

*Operation Ivy

*Queers

*Ramones

*Screeching Weasel

*Social Distortion

*Subhumans

I'm so, so utterly tired of hearing the constant bickering over what is and is not punk. Am I the only one who sees the absurd irony in that some people are trying to create rules on how to be punk? Considering how many people there are running about with their docs and koolaid colored hair testifying their punkness to the world these days, you would think that more of them would actually understand what being punk is all about. It's not a difficult concept, so I really can't comprehend why so many people are so hopelessly confused. My only explanation is that microwaves, cell phones, and lead paint are killing off people's brain cells at a faster rate than ever nowadays. But regardless of cause, most people don't seem to know what the hell they're talking about when it comes to punk. With each passing second, more fashion punks are being born into this world who are eager to cause the slow, painful rot and decay of my beloved punk rock. With their revolting need to regulate punk, these imbeciles would be better off wasting their efforts writing articles for seventeen magazine on the hottest looks for the upcoming season rather than soiling the punk scene with their ridiculous claims of how "green hairdye isn't punk this year, but purple is." For fuck's sake, trying to turn punk into a fashion show is sacrilegious. Just the idea of it disgusts me to the point of nauseousness. It is evident that something must be done about this. So here you have it boy and girls, Punk 101: The True Meaning of Punk Rock. Now listen carefully:

Punk is about being yourself.

That's it, kids. There's no catch; that is really all there is to it. Being punk means that you follow only your own morals, make your own rules, and stay true to your own opinions. And therefore, you don't abide by any form of government, religion, or other preset organizations. You don't rely on others to make your own decisions for you; you determine on your own what is right and wrong, what you do and do not like, what you should and should not believe in. Punk merit is not decided by how long your liberty spikes are or how many times you've been kicked in the face while moshing. What it is decided upon by is how willing you are to be yourself. You can be a diehard GG Allin fan and still have a softspot for Boy George. You can tuck in your shirt and not be a nerd. You can even go so far as to wear trendy clothes and listen to the top ten most popular bands as seen on empty vee. Anything goes. *Anything.* But only as long as you're only doing it to be an individual.

Once you start tucking in your shirt because it creates a look you want to associate yourself with or because the hipster kids at school are doing it, you've lost all essence of being punk. It works the other way around as well, once you start untucking your shirt to be rebellious or to look unfashionable you've still missed the point behind being punk. Basing your lifestyle around being different is every bit as lame as basing your lifestyle around trying to be like everyone else. If you shave your mullet haircut into a leopard print mohawk, buy an entire leather and spikes motif wardrobe, and stick safetypins through every part of your body imaginable, if you are only doing so because you want to be unique then you are still every bit as much of a fashion sucker as the carbon copy wankers who feel they have to wear Tommy Hilfiger to fit in. You're still buying into a fad, you're still not being true to yourself, you're still not being punk. If you are hiding behind an image, no matter how far from the mainstream that image may be, you are not being original. You are being a poser. A liar. A pathetic, scared, identity-challenged, confused dumbfuck. Not a punk. Got it?

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And now, for your viewing enjoyment, the brilliant Mr. Jello Biafra on Christian aerobics and how to sell out in style:

Punk Politics

*UPDATE! Jello Biafra for President! Click here for details.

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*DISCLAIMER: I do not consider myself to be the high priestess of punk rock by any means. I don't claim to be punker than thou. I just happen to know what punk is and to realize that it's one of the very few real things left in this world. It gives me something to believe in, and for that, I'm very grateful. That will be all.

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last updated: 6/19/2000
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