 | I got this joke from a friend of mine, I hope you like it... It's a list of things found written on the wall in public bathrooms... (Please don't get any ideas from it either...) |
- Here I lie in stinky vapor, Because some jerk stole the toilet paper, Shall I lie, or shall I linger, Or shall I be forced to use my finger.
- Here I sit, What a caper, I have to shit, But I'm out of paper
- Here I sit, Broken hearted, Tried to shit, But only farted
- You're lucky You had your chance. I tried to fart, And shit my pants!
- I came here to sit and think. But all I do is shit and stink.
- Some come here to sit and think, Some come here to shit and stink, But I come here to scratch my balls, And read the bullshit on the walls...
- (written high upon the wall) If you can piss above this line, the Hillsboro Fire Department want's you.
- (written high upon the wall above a urinal) Don't look up here, the joke's in your hand.
- Sign posted in a bathroom: We aim to please! You aim too! Please!
- Seen above a urinal: Please do not throw cigarette butts in our urinal. We don't piss in your ashtrays!
- Scratched into the paint of the condom-dispensing machine were these words: "Don't buy this gum, it tastes like rubber."
- On the inside of a toilet door: Patrons are requested to remain seated throughout the entire Performance.
- "$1.49 - All You Can Eat" (with an arrow pointing down into the toilet)
- A sign I saw at a swimming pool once: We don't swim in your toilet, so please don't pee in our pool!
- Another sign seen at a swimming pool: Welcome to our ool. Notice there's no P in it. Please keep it that way.
- My mother made me a whore. (to which someone else added) If I give her the yarn, will she make me one too?
- Under a sign that said "Employees Must Wash Hands," someone scribbled: I waited and waited, but I finally washed them myself.
- In the men's room at a Burger King restaurant: It takes the human body about 24 hours to turn good food into shit. It only takes Burger King 10 minutes.
- Sign seen at a restaurant: The hands that clean these toilets also make your food...please aim properly.
- Here I sit, I'm at a loss, trying to shit out taco sauce. When it comes, I hope and pray, I don't blow my ass away.
- Here's one seen above a urinal: look up look up (even higher on the wall) keep looking up (on the ceiling) Quick! Look down! You're pissing on your shoes!
- One of the funniest I've seen was also the simplest: Fart loud if you love your arse!
- While your sitting on the toilet you see written on the stall door: "Congratulations! You've one one free game of Toilet Tennis! Look Left." You look left and it reads: "Look Right." You look right and it reads: "Look Left..."
- Everybody pisses on the floor. Be a hero and shit on the ceiling.
- (written above a urinal) Why are you looking up here? Are you ashamed of it?
- Some people come here to take a shit, I come here to leave one.
- Don't look now! you're pissing on your neighbors foot.