"Let me in let me in little pigs
Not by the hair on our chinny chin chins
then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll...oh look a kitty!"
-Sam

"You know what would be cool? Padded walls! You could just bounce off of them! Ooh! And you know what else? A strait-jacket!! You wouldn't be able to move your arms or anything!"
-Caroline

"I thought I was facing hundreds of other qualified applicants, but being that I'm Fish, I swam in."
-Matthew Fishman

"Ha ha!! Loser!!... DONT HURT ME!!!!"
-Joshua

"What if the sun got so hot...it -froze-?"
-JJ

"What's a Commie?"
-Stephanie

"Why didn't they just make armour out of stone?"
-JJ

"SCREW YOU!!...DONT HURT ME!!!!!!!!"
-Joshua

"I hate hippies"
-Eric

"...You made me fall..."
-Caroline, after sucking in an entire balloon of helium and fainting against the lockers

"Look, it's the magic finger"
-Joshua, referring to his middle finger

"I'm here, I'm not, I'm here, I'm not..."
-Caroline

"No, twizzler baaaaaad"
-Joshua

"I'm going to hit you with a flaming bamboo stick!!!"
-Brad

"heeeeeeeeeeeeeeey....thaat waaaasnt veeery niiice"
-Caroline

"Remember, it's not what the kiwii is it's what the kiwii does; it closes up your throat."
-Kacy

"I know I'm ugly"
-Rachel

"That's cool but you're crazy"
-Kacy

Sarah Fife: "My mom has given me enough fig newtons to, like, feed an army, so if you all want some..."
Jane: "I have an army, can I have some?"

"The goodness, It is not there!!"
-Jonathan

"One time.....we went to Burmuuuda....and we were...like.....there........"
-Caitlin

"Meeeeeeeeeeep!"
-Rachel

Rachel: "It's negative 13 degrees out here today."
Me: "OMG! Are you kidding? Negative 30?!"
Karly: ".....Negative -13-!!! If it was negative 30 we'd be dead."
Me:".....ohhhhhhh"

"Gil-Gilga-Gilgamesh"
-Rachel and Kacy

"Tell me one of your famous stories."
-Frannie

"What if he said that she said that I said that we said that..wait....Dammit!"
-Eric

"AHHH! My eyes!!"
-Joshua after I poured pepper in his eyes...it was an accident..I swear :p

Me: "It's our friend, Tom."
Caroline: "He had a little 'accident'."
-Caroline and me when given funny looks by teachers as we carried a body bag up and down the hall. In truth it contained a fake Christmas tree that we were going to go set up somewhere.

"And she's buuuying a stairway to Po-o-land"
-Eric, Sam, and Joshua

Shadow L] What the hell is wrong with my shift key?
Raeon Serhane] It wants to see the world. :P Take it to France!

Josh: "Rachel! Have you any idea what this is?!"
Rachel: "Um...it's a hat..."
Josh: "But not just any hat!!! It's the hat I wore in the play." *puts it on* "I am the jester!"
Rachel: "and I am leaving...."

Sarah Fife: "Anything exciting happen while I was gone?"
Jane: "Tons. I just wasn't involved."

"So you're saying cows are Buddhists?"
-Will F.

"Jason, your hair is full of lies."
-Aaron

"Dance, Puppets, dance."
-Will W.

Aaron: "My computer mouse is as slow as Christ."
Jordan: "Really? How slow was Christ?"
Aaron: "Well, he wasn't fast enough to get away from the Romans."

Disembodied Voice: "Mmmm, doughnuts."
Rachel:"...I'm scared"

"Well, they look like squirrels, but they're, like,...not."
-Rachel

"Blblblblblblbloop!"
-Michelle

"The Charlies aren't just -in- the trees, the Charlies -are- the trees!"
-Neal

"He who hesitates, sucks."
-Lucas

"You see...Men are perverted pieces of meat sent to Earth to find a hot chick...And stare at it...And other things that I find inappropriate...Even for me."
-Ashton

"Cows are underrated."
-Lucas

"Now that I've given up all hope, I feel better."
-My Dad

Colton: "I don't have any smart friends. What should I do?"
Lucas:"Stop making yourself appealing to dumb people."

"Something has gone terribly wrong!"
-An error message on Jane's computer

Ed: "My God! Dare I put roast beef on an English muffin?"
Will: "Dare you, Ed? Dare you?"
Ed: "I dare. I dare and I do."

Sawicki: "Yeah, well, after a while you start to learn..."
Sarah Fife: "That wee nippers have big ears?"
Sawicki: "I don't give two shits about the wee nippers, it's the big ones I'm worried about."

"I don't smell Apple Cinnamon and go, 'I wanna breed with her!'"
-Sawicki, upon being told, during Biology, that perfumes contain pheremones.

Test: "Is Satan in my closet? Why is Satan in the closet? When will he be coming out? What will the world's reaction be when Satan comes out of the closet? (Satan likes flowers....And butterflies....And pretty, pretty ponies)"
Will: "Are you implying that Satan is gay?"
- From a test that Sawicki and I wrote for class.

"That's nice, but...I don't care."
-Aaron

Sarah Fife: "Jonathan, have you seen your wife?"
Jonathan: "Yeah, she's about my height, brown hair..."

"My eyes are being hit by everything all the time somehow. It's like they have uncontrollable force powers. If you were to throw anything in any part of the world in any direction, odds are it would end up in my eye."
-Dante

Jane: "She's kinda hot."
Me: "She's a Sim, Jane."
Jane: "You said my Sim was hot."
Me: "She was!"
Jane: "Well!"

Carol Macy: "What page is the prologue on?"
Sarah Fife: "The first page, Carol."

"Put a quote from me."
-Halsey

Carol Macy: "Well, I start thinking about the actors as their characters..."
Sara Dager: "Because Sarah Fife is totally a large, middle-aged black woman with a soulful singing voice.

Ariel: "Manischiewitz!"
Dessa: "What's that?"
Ariel: *shrugs* "It's a matzo brand."

"If I had a bulletin bo-ard, I would buy you a tack."
-Ariel

"Did you know I have three hands? The third one's just invisible."
-Sawicki

"I appreciate what you're saying..."*pause* "What are you saying?"
-Sean

Jane: "Hal, what are you doing?"
Hal: "Sort of."
Jane: *Pause* "What?"

Ken: "Okay, I need someone to help out with Bingo tonight."
Aaron: "Do we have to bring our own senior citizens?"

"I am free from the jaws of death that are the curling iron!"
-Caroline

Sawicki: "Reading makes me bleed."
Rick: "Where?"

"It's like a guitar with buttons and your mouth!"
-Jane, on saxophones.

"I have a distinct lack of pants, right now."
-Sawicki

"I'm going to beat the dumbass out of you!"
-Sawicki

"I found my coooooomb!"
-Colton

Tori: "I could be a model."
Claire: "Tori has the face of an angel!"
Mike Hanig: "Yeah, if angels were horses."

Sawicki: "No necessito pantalones!"
Stuart: "Sawicki, I don't believe you realize how incredibly inaccurate that statement is."

"The cake, oh how it taunts me!"
-Casey

"What if emo people could control meteors with their minds?"
-Nick Pusateri

"Off dancing with Patrick Swayze. Will return when sight of him in a dress becomes less amusing."
-Sara D.'s away message on AIM

Sara Dager: "The only cartoon woman that I like is Betty Boop because she's hardcore."
Me: "Hardcore, huh?"
Sara Dager: "Well, she is! She stands on her own two feet and everything!"
Me: "That's because she's bipedal."

"Fuck you and fuck the pumpkin carriage you rode in on."
-Alex

"We're not talking about something important! We're talking about people's feelings!"
-Sara Dager

"I'm too confused to care right now."
-Sam Melin

Batman:*Picking a lock.* "I'm good with locks."
Man: "Is there anything you're bad at?"
Batman:*Narrows his eyes* "Needlepoint."
- From one of Colton's comic books

"It's kinda like if I said to Jane, 'Jane, your hair is awesome, but your face is terrible!'"�
-Drew (Chemistry Teacher)

"Yeah, you keep it on your shoulder, just like a birthday-uh, parrot! I meant parrot!"
-Patrick

"You should have seen [the snow] last Friday. It was like God's place got raided and he decided to dump his stash on us. Entire two foot's worth."
-Dante

"I only like the part where the Nazis come and make them sad."
-Casey Abeson on "The Sound of Music".

Jane: "You're digressing!"
Casey: "How am I digressing? It's a classic song!"
Jane: "YOU'RE A CLASSIC SONG!"

"Maybe I shouldn't have thrown that suitcase at that policeman."
-Alex Griswold

Rebecca: "If I stab myself in the jugular will I begin to lose all my blood?"
Me: "Well, if you pull the pencil out..."
Kinsley: "Don't encourage her, Dessa."

"Sawicki, put it down."
-Everyone in Stuart's core.

Drew (Science teacher): "You can have a mole of just about anything..."
Jane: "Can we have a mole of Jane?"
Drew: "You can have a mole of just about anything. You can have a mole of grass-seed..."
Jane:"But that's boring. A mole of Jane is so much cooler."

"Dear God. When I wished that more stuff that's only supposed to happen in movies would happen, this isn't what I meant."
-Sara Kaplan

Kate: "Don't be hatin'."
Sawicki: "Then don't be irri-tatin'."

Aaron: "When I turned eleven, I had nothing. I had to walk backwards to school everyday."
Jane: "Up and down hills in the snow."
Aaron: "Covered in fire ants."

"Are we really getting a presentation from librarians? I think I'm going to kill myself. It's gonna be like, 'The Dewey Decimal System was invented by St. Dewis the Third."
-Sawicki