Thursday, September 19, 2002

:[mood]: ack

So sleeeeeeeeepy. I fell asleep on the couch early, early this morning. I was waiting to do something but it didn't go as planned. Ah well. Looks like i'm trying again this morning. Doesn't make any sense at all. Oh well. Today was first day of classes. Oh my gosh!!!!!! Okay guess who I saw today! Everyone says it's a sign. It is a sign! Okay so my friend came over today and I just showed her around the apartment blah blah blah. It was about noon and we were going to leave to get lunch. Oh my gosh! Like as we exited the building I couldn't believe my eyes. I saw the guy I had been completely smitten over last year- right in front of me. I was like talking to my friend and pointing 'there's Ryan!' He was just putting his headphones on when he saw us and we said hi. Stopped and talked a bit. Oh my gosh he is still soooooooooo foine! Apparently he transferred out of Northeastern but is in some other college very close to here. He was just visting a friend who lives in my building. He is so freckin fine. Okay c'mon it's a sign. Even though he transferred he just happened to be right in front of *my* building at this exact time. Aaaaaaah! Gosh it felt like last year all over again!!!!! Eeeeeeeeee!!! :D

Well, yeah that was my wonderful happening for today. Classes sucked. I hate school as usual. So many dern people kinda annoying. I think one class had like 190 people. Ugh don't even get me started on classes. I'm just super happy I saw Ryan. It's just so weird being here in Boston. Maybe 'cause i'm not used to it yet and i'm still not in my groove. Gotta find my groove. I'll let you know when Amanda gets her groove. Or how Amanda got her groove back. hehehe. Groooove. That's a pretty cool word. Grooooove. Oh dern it I need to sleep now. Be up in a little while to try again and freck. I don't know again...

Wednesday, September 18, 2002

:[mood]: ehhhh

I feel like writing now since i'm up. Roommates are out for the night and i'm alone in the dorm. I'm just so tired and so out of it. This is going to be interesting being that I never had roommates last year. Uhm it just feels so weird for now being here in Boston. I don't know a lot of thoughts running through my head right now. Getting some advice from a friend over the instant messager. I don't know. There's just this guy and uhm, my situation being out here in Boston is really hard for me I must admit. I don't know what to do. At this very second I think I should just forget about everything. Yeah way easier said than done. Oh freck. Ugh. It's not like it's the distance that's bothering me. Okay maybe a little bit but it's more what's changed and what's not there any more. I'm just aggrevating myself again ain't I? Yeah. Freck why does this have to be so difficult. I really have to work on forgetting about everything. Oh I keep saying that but I cannot. Then i'm going to be a party pooper and down a lot. That sucks. I don't want to be like that. See my mind knows what to do but my heart doesn't. My heart won't listen. I want to cry right now. I'm such a cry baby. So emotional. I kind of know why. It's my special time. Anyways! Freeeeeeeeck. Ugh it's killing me, it's killing me. *sigh, sigh, sigh*

Tuesday, September 17, 2002

:[mood]: halfly sick

I have a stomachache. So i'm actually alone in my dorm trying not to break my stomach or something cleaning and putting away stuff in my room. hehe. Ow. Kind of tired right now. Woke up at like 4 a.m. to say bye to my dad :( who left for beautiful home. Yeah. Got my class schedule. It stinks. Calc, microecon, science, and psychology. Okay I think I gotta go lie down. :p'.

Monday, September 16, 2002

:[mood]: halfly here

Been in Boston for a couple days now. Spent my first night in my new dorm. Pretty cool. Roommates are cool. Went to a Red Sox game but left on the 5th inning (inning's right?) because it was raining pretty hard. Now back in the dorm trying to get warm. Classes start on the 19th. Not looking forward to that. Ooh pretty pessimistic. I gotta stop being pessimistic as i've been told by a couple of people already. :p'. But yeah. My dad's still here and he's leaving to go back home tomorrow. :\ Yeah I guess i'm kind of missing Hawaii. Don't really miss being a lazy butt 'cause I just tried on about 5 jeans and they don't fit me 'cause I got too fat over the summer. Missing somebody terribly. But not thinking about him too much now 'cause i'm actually not sitting on my butt with nothing to do. Hope everyone back home and all my friends are doing good. :)

Thursday, September 12, 2002

:[mood]: aaaa

Well, i'm leaving tonight. I don't think it has hit me yet. Like right now I am just so out of it again. Maybe it's me waking up every hour or watching the sun rise at 5:30 or a bunch of stuff. Yeah the last couple of days have been a little bit weird for me. I just got somewhat angry at a friend for no good reason. Well, no good reason I could give him. Just a bunch of stuff running through my mind and unfortunately he was the poor sap I dumped it on. Sorry. :( I hate leaving everything behind and moving so far. Some people just don't understand how big of a change that is for me. You know going 5,000 miles away. Who'd thought Amanda would do that? Ah well. I don't know what else to say right now. Just waiting to talk to my friend and apologize to him. Ack I need some sleep or more days at home dern it.

Sunday, September 08, 2002

:[mood]: waaa

Dern. I'm leaving soon! Waaaaaaaaa. Already saying good-bye to some people. Kind of sad. I guess that's part of the college life. I don't even want to think about packing. Hello i'm dumb 'cause i'm probably going to end up packing last minute and forget like everything. Okay well again I don't feel like writing now so i'm going to write later...yeay...

Friday, September 06, 2002

:[mood]: eh

I'll be leaving in a few days. Ha-za. Kind of sad. Of course i'm sad. Why wouldn't I be sad? I'm very sad at one thing but I kind of don't want to think about that right now. I am quite tired right now for some reason...oh yeah I slept late. And it was so dern hot last night and right now. It's sucking out all my energy. Oh well. More from me later when i'm not so bleh...

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