| Ninja Monkey Wave |
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| *TARD OF THE WEEK* The following customer wrote to our online store on Sunday, September 26th, 2004: ******** Hello,you GOING? HERE he/she is FL�VIO RAMOS AND I WANT to REMOVE WITH YOU SOME DOUBTS: WHICH is THE MISTAKE SPECIFICALLY OF THE CARD THAT is IMPEDING THE PURCHASE OF THE PRODUCT? Is MY LIMIT OF PURCHASES SUFFICIENTLY BOM.SER� why MY credit card it is IT it SEEKS NATIONAL it is NOT THE INTERNATIONAL? Don't I KNOW IF YOU SABEM,MAS THE BANKS OF MY COUNTRY are IN GREVE.TODOS ELES.H� SOME PROBLEM IMPEDING THAT? IN CASE he/she PERSISTS SAME PROBLEMA,COMO is it THAT DO to DO THE PAYMENT TO THE VIEW? Will the DEPOSIT BE MADE IN WHAT BANK? BUT IF I DO THE DEPOSIT IN DINHEIRO NACIONAL,QUANTO will I PAY? ONLY MORE A QUESTION: Is SOME RATE OF SHIPPING OF BOOK,OU PAID THE FREIGHT it is FREE? I HOPE YOU ORDER THE FASTEST POSSIBLE A POSITION ON MY PERGUNTAS,POIS WANTS to ACQUIRE THE FASTEST POSSIBLE THAT BOOK. Doing NEED! Thank you very much it is EVEN MORE!!!! ******** I ask you to consider the capitalization techniques utilized by this customer. -Clearly the Brazilians are years ahead of us in the capitalization race. Also, please consider that the customer above was responding to an automated response message from our store and that the brilliant lines like, "Is MY LIMIT OF PURCHASES SUFFICIENTLY BOM.SER� why MY credit card it is IT it SEEKS NATIONAL it is NOT THE INTERNATIONAL?" demonstrate this customers rebellion from ordinary grammarical considerations. He does not feel constrained to the use of just one language. He proudly modulates from Portuguese, to Spanish, to English with ease. It is pure poetry in motion. This is a brilliant literary genius and a great man. |
| Coming Soon: a special offer from Ninja Monkey Wave! ...and the yearly winner will win a trip to Washington DC where for three glorious days and nights they can view the original US Constitution while staying at the "Capitol Inn" with color TV and air conditioning, and including FREE weekly maid service and cockroach control, within 45 easy miles of the capital! PLUS! One very lucky tard will also receive a free pen and notepad with the words "Capitol Inn" printed on it with machinelike precision...in red ink! This way they can practice their tardish writing whenever the urge strikes them! |
| "Banks can suck my dick." |
| As crazy as he is brilliant, Ninja Monkey Wave heads up the northern sector of the West Coast Division of the Ninja Monkeys. At his wits end as far as tardism is concerned, Ninja Monkey Wave is merciless when faced with any sort of affront to the integrity of the intellect. It remains his objective to revitalize the use of proper grammar and spelling in the United States, because, as he says, he's "tired of biotches tryin'a strip me of my prerogative to use a comma!" |
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