| The Koalas and the Pandas. Koalas are coarse and mannerless! Capybara's are ten times the sweetness of a Koala! Koalas are leave-eating dirty old men! I want to see Koalas at war with Pandas. I want to see a koala's cute descicated corpse being crushed by the tank tread of a Panda's great steel-encased army vehicle. Koala protestors stoning the tanks of the pandas as they role into their main city. Then the Panda make their women into whores, as the koalas slowly plan their underground uprising. Then the koalas secretly plant bombs in the war room of the panda leader, Jai Pandala. The super elite Pandahoo and Jai Pandala are destoryed in one massive four story cloud of dust and ashe. And I DO mean ashe! Finally the koalas are able to return to their former way of life, but the resentment remains against their former Panda oppressors. Koalas work hard to get their economy back on track, but the Pandas still have a larger resource base as the Koalas lands have mostly been depleted of vital resources. Finally the Koalas are forced to stage a long awaited counter-attack, during which the Panda's capital city of Pandang is over 60% destroyed. The Koalas take the city under siege and demand a better armistice agreement. The Panda's desperately cave in and grant the Koalas large tracks of land that have historically been controlled exclusively by Panda's. This makes some of the Pandas living in the remote regions which were ceded very angry, and they naturally petition the government for redress of their grievances, but the Panda government, now moved to the temporary capital of Panadu will not do anything which might spawn further Koala attacks, and so the Pandas in the ceded lands are given large sums of leaves and all the fresh twigs they need to make their nests if they will leave their land and move further into Panda territory. T he Koala Capital of Koalalo grants free passage for the displaced Pandas, and they are soon free to move within the disputed terrritory. Fortunately the heat of this conflict has died down within the last several generations, and where once there was conflict, there now are quaint Panda food restaurants for Koala tourists on the boarder lands, and the Panda's have erected a statue of Koalonga, the Great Koala Peacemaker, on the boarder between Koalaland and Pandia. You must read the great books of Koalonga or Jai Pandala murderous treatise on war! They are masterpieces. Without the contributions of the Pandas we would not have the dishes of stewed spinach and carrots, or mashed potatoes...and without the wisdom of the Koala prophets we could hardly have founded a democracy! What of the terms, "pandocracy" and "Koala Peace." These are important ideas in contemporary politics and political science. Government by Pandas has the same connotation as "kangaroo court." And the false peace that comes when a government bows to the weakness of its people is a "Koala Peace." For example, there was a "Koala Peace" before Hitler took the Rhineland. The "Koala Peace" was, as usual, ended by war and bloodshed. "Koala Peace" is the perfect term for what happened after World War I in Germany. No one was happy, but no one had the will to fight. Anyway, I see that this is something that you could stand to read up a bit more on. Don't worry...there are plenty of sources. |
| Waves of Ranting Fumosity |