“Why’d you do that?” Nick protested, weakly.

“I didn’t want to, believe me.” Jake wrapped an arm around Nick and pulled him closer. “You’re an amazing kisser.” He whispered in his ear.

“Then why?” Jake could see the confusion and hurt in Nick’s eyes. Jake knew that, just like him, if Nick was with a woman there was no stopping. You kissed, you fucked, and everybody went to sleep happy and content. That was just the way it was, especially with celebrities. You didn’t take time to get to know the chick you were with. She was willing, that was all you needed to know. But this was different. This was special and Jake didn’t want to fuck up a hopefully good friendship just because he was horny. He cared about Nick and he didn’t want to hurt him in any way.

“I had to.” Jake replied simply.

“No you didn’t. You said you didn’t want to.” Nick placed a long kiss on Jakes neck. Jake sighed and closed his eyes. This was so good, and Nick was right, he didn’t want to.

“We have to…stop.” Jake eventually protested, pulling away slightly.

“You’re giving me mixed signals here man.” Nick’s voice held a slight edge. “I can tell you want this, just like you can tell I want it. You came on to me and now you’re pushing me away?”

“It’s not like that.”

“I’ve been going crazy for the past three days, wondering about you, wondering about me, thinking I’m fuckin’ crazy and here I am, and you say no?”

Jake placed his hands firmly on Nicks shoulders. “Nick, let me explain.”

“There’s nothin’ to explain.” Nick started to stand up.

Jake grabbed Nick’s hands and pulled him back down. This was going all wrong, entirely not the way he had envisioned them being together at all. Jake leaned towards Nick and offered a comforting hug and a kiss to the cheek. “Please listen to me.”

Nick nodded briefly, his eyes still blazing and his cheeks red, with passion or fury, Jake wasn’t sure.

“I like you Nick. I know that sounds lame. Like. It’s such a small, stupid word. But I really like you. I want to be with you. God knows how much I want to be with you. But I don’t want to hurt you.”

Nick barked out a short laugh. “No way man. I already decided before I even came over here that I wouldn’t be taking your dick.”

Jake smiled and brushed his hand across Nick’s cheek. “That’s not what I meant, Nick.” He saw Nick’s eyes blur in confusion once more. “I mean, I want you to be sure. I want you to be as sure as I am, that you want to be with me. I don’t want you doing this just because you think I want it, or because you just want to try it out and I’m willing. I want you to be positive this is what you want.”

“I think…I’ve thought…about this a lot…before I came over.” Nick said quietly.

“Why did you decide to come back to me, Nick? Why are you here?”

Jake watched Nick’s face very carefully. He had pretty good bullshit radar from working and being surrounded in the business for most of his life. If Nick were going to hand him a line, he’d be able to tell.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” Nick admitted. “I kept thinking about our kiss…”

“The one you ran out on?”

“Yeah…I was freaked man. Give me a break.”

“You’re not gay, are you?”

“No…I…no. What about you?”

Jake pondered that for a moment. What was he? He’d asked himself the same question the day after he first met Nick. “I guess…I must be bi. I’ve never been with a man before.”

“You’ve kissed a man before.” Nick pointed out.

“Obviously. But we never had sex. He was just lucky enough to see my naked ass.” Jake snorted.

“Everybody’s seen your naked ass.” Nick shot back. “You’re like some exhibitionist or something!”

“Touche.” Nick had a point. He had removed his clothes in a fair number of movies and anyone that had seen “Jarhead” had probably seen more of him than they might have cared to. “It’s all for art, man, all for art.”

“Whatever.” Nick replied. “So you’ve never…fucked a guy.”

“No. I’m assuming you haven’t either.”

Nick quickly shook his head. “Any guy ever sucked you off?”

Jake decided to be fully honest with Nick, and hoped that he would do the same with him. “Just once, when I was younger. We were curious. We thought just doing a blowjob didn’t make you gay. So we did it.” Jake shrugged his shoulders. “And you?”

“I dropped E once.” Nick slumped down in the sofa and sighed deeply. “I wanted…needed…anyone or anything to get me off. I think it was a guy. I don’t remember.”

“So here we are. A couple of virgins.” Jake laughed at his own joke.

Nick laughed and then stopped himself. “So, Jake, I can’t figure this out. I’m not attracted to other men. Just you. I still like girls, I think they’re hot. So, why me? If you’re not gay, tell me why you want me?”

Jake smiled, "You know what? I don't even know. I think you're..." He paused, like he was searching for just the right word, that could encompass everything he thought Nick was. "You're beautiful, but so much more than that."

Nick could feel the blood rush to his face and his ears, he knew he was blushing. He'd heard girls say he was beautiful before, and he'd always found that a little odd, but hearing Jake say it. that just made him feel a little warm and fuzzy. It wasn't exactly an answer, but it was good enough for now.

Jake was pleased with Nick's expression. he could tell the blonde was happy with what he'd said. "I guess there's only one way to find out."

Nick looked at him, pretty sure of what he meant. Was he ready for that? He still didn't know. but he also knew if Jake wanted to, he'd do it. He wasn't the kind of guy who did a lot of thinking before he started acting. "Find out what?" he asked, just to clarify.

"What we think about being with another man." Jake said, leaning over the space between him and Nick and pressing his lips against Nick's.

"Mmmhmmm" was about all Nick got to mumble as the kiss got deeper. His hands started roaming, exploring the contours of a body that was completely different from what he was used to feeling. There was no way he could deny that he liked this. something about the kissing was more aggressive. very real and very raw.

Jake obviously decided if they were going to play like that, he was going all the way with it and began reaching for the hem of Nick's shirt, trying to ease it up over his head as they kissed.

Nick felt Jake's hands sliding over his stomach and did his best not to flinch. he was into it, but it was still so different, so new and really, so strange. He moved away and grabbed his shirt, pulling it off and then went after Jake's. Might as well make things fair. As the shirts went flying across the room, Nick's eyes began roving over Jake's chest again. He was ripped...had more chest hair than Nick.

As Jake leaned in to kiss him again, Nick tried to push all the thoughts out of his head. Don't think. just do.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nick was hyper-aware of Jake's hands and where they were going. He couldn't deny he was turned on, ready for attention. but was this what he wanted? How was he going to feel about it later? He'd had a few encounters with girls over the years that he couldn't figure out what he had been thinking afterwards and he didn't want this to turn out the same way.

Jake looked carefully at Nick's face, searching for any sign of hesitation apprehension, or discomfort with the situation. He was wondering how far this would. could go.

Nick's mind was racing faster than he could keep up with. He knew Jake was going for his belt. then probably his jeans. What then? What if they ended up naked? What would they do? He did wonder about blowjobs. did guys do it better? What would it actually be like to try to give one?

Jake saw the panicked look flicker across Nick's face and quickly pulled his hand back, putting a little space between them. "What are you thinking?"

Nick didn't say anything for a second. He looked at Jake, then out the window. "You have a pool, right?"

"Yeah. doesn't everyone out here?" Jake replied, laughing half-heartedly, curious where Nick was going.

Nick stood up and headed toward the back door. He pulled his belt out of the loops and dropped it on the floor, and looked at Jake, still sitting on the couch. "C'mon."

Jake stood up and watched with wide eyes as Nick began undoing his jeans and pushing them down his legs, leaving him in just his boxer-briefs. He could see that Nick had enjoyed what they'd been doing as much as he had. "Where are we going?"

"Skinny-dipping." Nick replied, opening the door and stepping out into the darkness.

Jake dropped his pants and boxers and went running out to the pool, past Nick and cannon-balled into the pool.

Nick took a deep breath as he whipped off his underwear and went crashing into the water. Naked swimming, that had to be a good start. or at least an easier one. He felt more at ease once he was in the pool, surrounded by the warm-ish water. His eyes drifted to Jake, the wet hair going every which way, the slightly mischievous smirk on his lips. he was a good looking guy. And apparently a very willing partner. If he was ever going to try anything, why not with him? Why not now?

Jake looked over at Nick, treading water and seemingly deep in thought. He moved through the water slowly, watching Nick closely as he approached. When Nick didn't move away Jake reached out for him, slipping his hand around the back of Nick's neck and drawing him close, tilting his head to kiss him again, slowly and deeply.

Nick's heart was pounding as he wrapped his arms around Jake's waist, pulling the other man's naked body against his own. It felt different from anything he'd ever known, and he was more than a little surprised that he wasn't nearly as freaked out as he would have expected. There was something oddly sexy about feeling the taut muscles and. everything else he could feel. That. was odd, but it was kind of cool. it was one thing to know he'd turned on a girl, but something kind of empowering to know he had the same effect on a guy.

Jake gasped in their kiss as he felt Nick's hands sliding down over his hips and instinctively bit down on Nick's lower lip when as his hands moved lower and came together, tentatively exploring.

Giddy with his own boldness, Nick couldn't help but pull away from Jake to softly giggle, half unable to believe he had another man's cock in his hands.