“I thought you got lost in there.” Jake joked upon Nick’s return.

Nick smiled brightly at Jake. “Nope, just had to shake the stick, if you know what I mean.” Nick tossed Jake a wink.

Jake winked back. “Gotcha.”

“So what’s been going on, what did I miss?”

“Just some speeches, very interesting really. I can see myself being involved with this organization at some point.”

“We could work together man, that would be awesome.” Nick grinned.

“I’d like that a lot.” Jake admitted.

“I’ll have to take you over to meet the president. I’m sure they’d love to have you on board, Jake.” Nick enthused.

Just then, one of the board members called on Nick to say a few words about his experience as a celebrity chairperson for the group.

“I’ll be right back.” Nick assured Jake. “I hate this part!”

As Nick spoke about his enjoyment of working with Heal the Bay, he couldn’t help but notice that Jake never once took his eyes off of him. Two can play that game, Nick thought to himself, and tossed a huge smile Jake’s way.

Jake’s heart leapt when he saw Nick beaming at him from the podium. He knew it was time to kick things into overdrive. No more tip toeing around the subject.

Speech over, Nick returned to his seat and flopped down with a sigh. “I hate doing that!”

“You have nice lips.”

“Wha…?”

“Your mouth, your lips they’re…nice.” Jake sat back in his seat, folded his arms and smirked at Nick.

“I…I…thank you?” Nick stammered, the confidence he was feeling before knocked right out of him. His thoughts automatically returned to the way his dancer friend had talked about his mouth and lips. The way he’d been thinking about Jake’s lips. Nick felt a small shudder run through his body and he hoped it was a shudder of disgust, but a small part of his brain was telling him otherwise.

For the remainder of the night the two men kept the conversation light and Nick tried to avoid the topic of his body parts but Jake would, every so often, casually drop a bomb that would make Nick squirm in his seat.

“Your eyes are so blue.”

“Your hair really looks great like that.”

“Your hands look nice and strong.”

The thoughts whizzing through Nick’s brain were making him dizzy. He knew for sure now, or almost for sure, that Jake was coming on to him. What kind of guy tells another guy he has nice lips? And then the way he’d been thinking about Jake, what brought that on? Was it just he way Jake was acting or did he really think that Jake…looked good…to him?

Jake watched the emotions shifting over Nick’s face. He hoped his comments hadn’t upset Nick. He’d meant every one of them. Jake decided he had to tell Nick soon, and find out once and for all. They could move at their own pace then…or hopefully, remain friends.

“Are you alright, man? You look strange.” Jake was snapping his fingers in front of Nick’s face.

“Huh, what?”

“You’re, like, in outer space. The shindig’s winding up here, I think. A lot of people have left. I was asking if you wanted to go out for a drink.”

A drink. Nick considered this. In the last two days he’d spent more time with Jake then he spent with most people. And Jake was acting…strange. Was going out for a drink really a good idea? But he enjoyed his time with Jake. They talked easily, had more in common than Nick every thought they would, they had a good time together. What the hell?

“Sure. Sure. A drink sounds good.”

“Two drinks sound better.” Jake teased.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jake drove to a small jazz bar, on the outskirts of the city. The air was smoky, the music was loud, but not annoyingly so and the crowds mixed conversations sounded like so many buzzing bees. Nick surveyed the layout of the club and nodded, approving.

“I’ve never heard of this place.”

“I love it. It’s quiet and out of the way. No one bothers you here, you’re just another music fan, you know?”

“Sounds fantastic.” Nick agreed.

“You like jazz?” Jake questioned.

“I’ve never really listened to it, but I like all sorts of music. I’m willing to give it a try.” Nick grinned.

They settled into a corner booth and Jake ordered a couple of beers for them to start off with. He had a feeling the drinks would get harder as the night grew longer.

They conversed comfortably enough, talking about music, surfing, movies, their dogs, again. Jake could tell that Nick was still uncomfortable. And now, after they’d both consumed a few drinks, maybe it was time to get it all out in the open.

“Nick, is something bothering you?” Jake questioned Nick, touching his hand gently.

“What?” Nick jumped at Jake’s touch.

“You seem...jumpy...nervous. What’s the problem?”

“Ah…nothing. Everything’s fine.” Nick’s face went red, but Jake couldn’t tell in the darkness of the club.

“Honestly Nick. Whatever it is. I’d rather we talk about it and get it out here, than hold it inside. It’s healthier for you to talk about things.”

Nick shook his head and took a quick swig from his glass.

“Nick?”

“You’re freaking me out man! I don’t know what to think. I like you, like friend like you. But I’m having thoughts, weird shit thoughts and you keep saying stuff…you keep looking at me. I just don’t know…I don’t know what the hell I’m thinking or what the fuck you’re thinking!” Nick exploded.

Jake sat back, surprised. He thought he would have to push a little more to get Nick to admit to having feelings about him. Maybe drinks had loosened his brains grip on his tongue.

“I’m thinking that you’re a good looking guy I would like to get to know better.” Jake offered, simply.

“You want…me.” Nick sputtered weakly.

“Basically, yes.” Jake grinned at Nick, happy to have his thoughts known and not rejected outright. At least not yet.

“I…Jake…I’m not…I don’t…” Nick still couldn’t form a complete sentence. His brain just couldn’t wrap around the concept of what Jake had just told him.

Jake reached over to Nick and touched his cheek gently. Nick didn’t have the energy to twist away from him. “Nick. Are you telling me a good looking guy like you has never been with a man?”

"No!" Nick answered emphatically and probably too quickly. He gulped down the rest of his drink, looking away from Jake. He hadn't been with a guy. Not really. Not that he was...aware of.

There'd been that.. one time.. the first time he'd dropped E. he'd wanted someone, anyone. didn't matter who. The only thing he vaguely recalled was someone's mouth on him, and the horrified realization it might not have been a woman. But that was part of the beauty of ecstasy. it didn't matter who, as long as you got it from someone. At least, that was how he'd chosen to look at it.

Jake noticed the long pause and was sure there was a story there...one that he probably wasn't going to get to hear. He felt like he should probably apologize because he'd obviously made Nick uncomfortable. but at least they were being honest. things were out in the open. they could move forward now. "Nick."

Nick looked back at him, warily. "Yeah?"

"I didn't mean to freak you out. I just wanted you to know." Jake said, quietly, trying to soften his expression, to be as non-threatening as possible.

Nick shifted in his seat again. He wasn't sure what made him more nervous. that Jake had openly admitted he wanted him. or that he wasn't entirely opposed to the idea. He cleared his throat, "I'm...uh...glad you're...being honest."

Noticing Nick's body language, Jake felt bad. He knew he'd made him nervous and he hadn't wanted to do that, but just to get things out in the open. "I'm sorry, Nick."

"Don't be sorry. It just...surprised me." Nick said. Everything about it surprised him. He was surprised he hadn't freaked out more, honestly. and he was surprised that he'd consider it. He was considering it, wasn't he? He hadn't run off yet. He wasn't totally repulsed by the idea. and that probably freaked him out more than anything.

"I have an idea." Jake started, glancing at Nick to see if he was even listening.

"Yeah."

"Why don't we go out in a couple days. and just. see what happens, okay?"

Nick considered. It was a lot like going out with a girl. you went out. and hoped for the best. Maybe you'd get lucky, maybe you wouldn't. He looked over at Jake and let the thoughts roll around in his head. After a long pause, he said, "Alright."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nick slipped his watch around his wrist and fastened it, checking the time once he had it on. He was supposed to be meeting Jake for dinner and then. whatever happened. "Whatever" covered a lot. It could be anything, everything. nothing.

He kept telling himself this wasn't a date. But that's what it felt like. A date. Like he was getting ready. already thinking about the end of the night and skipping over everything in between. What would happen? What wouldn't happen?

He'd spoken to Jake a few times over the past few days... short conversations on the phone, nothing like the way they'd talked in person. Maybe it was actually being together that brought out the...what was that? Chemistry? Sparks?

This all felt a little bit ridiculous. He didn't worry this much before dates with chicks. But then again, he always knew how that would work out. he knew how those nights would go. Go out, have some fun, get it on, maybe or maybe not see each other again.

What would happen if he and Jake got together? Shit. There he went again. But since he was already there. how did that even work? Who'd...do...what?

Nope. No. Absolutely not. No way in hell was he finishing that thought. He shook his head a little bit, like he could make the thought actually leave his head by doing so.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ When he arrived at the restaurant, another place he'd never been before, Jake was already waiting for him. This place was quiet and out-of-the-way. likely to be paparazzi-free hopefully.

He walked to the table, well aware of Jake's eyes drifting over him. He couldn't help but notice the smile... who didn't love it when someone gave an appreciative grin?

He dropped into the seat across from Jake, "Been waiting long?"

Jake shook his head, "Nah... just a few minutes... you're right on time."

An older waitress came to their table, taking absolutely no notice of the two men, barely looking up from her order tablet as she asked what they'd like to drink.

Nick hadn't even gotten his mouth open and Jake was ordering them both beer. He had to admit, he was a little impressed when Jake got the brand and brew just right. It was nice to have someone pay attention.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Aren't you kind of slummin' then, hanging out with me?" Nick asked, glancing at Jake as he reached for his beer again. They'd been talking easily since they'd gotten their drinks. Dinner had been ordered, eaten, and the plates taken away...and they were still talking. It was easier, somehow, being in person.. being able see him as he spoke... watch his eyes and his expressions...Shit.

"What? Why would you say that?" Jake asked, looking thoroughly confused as to the logic behind that statement.

"You just seem so.. I don't know... like, you know more and you've done more... You've gone to college and.."

Jake interrupted him, "I dropped out..."

"To pursue your career! It's not like you couldn't handle it and gave up..."

"What are you saying? You haven't given up on things either, otherwise you'd have never made it where you are." Jake said.

Nick gave a half-hearted chuckle, "Some days I don't know where the hell I am."

Jake looked directly across the table, straight into Nick's eyes. "You're here. With me."

Nick felt his heart flip over in his chest. Whoa.. that was quite a look. "Yeah... I am..." he said, quietly, wondering what part of him it was that wanted to leave and be somewhere else with him.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nick walked out of the restaurant, trailing just slightly behind Jake. They'd decided to leave without any real plan of where they'd go next, or if there was any 'next'.

They got to Nick's car first, and Jake asked, "I don't live too far from here, would you want to... come over... for a while?"

Without giving himself time to think, Nick answered quickly, "Sure... that's cool."

Jake gave him a wide smile, "Follow me..." He jogged over to his car and gave Nick a wave before closing the door.

Nick got into his car and started the engine, wondering what he was doing. Maybe nothing. Maybe something. Who knew?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nick stepped into Jake's house, quickly surveying his surroundings. It was nice... it seemed to reflect the idea that he had of who Jake was as a person. As he looked around, he noticed Jake moving closer to him, stopping just to his side.

He turned to look at Jake, their eyes meeting for a second and he tried not to look away... but he did, just a little, as he heard the whisper, "May I kiss you?"