|NEO 5 PRODUCTIONS|
|MARIO 128 DOES NOT FEATURE 128 MARIOS!!!
Although it was previously thought so, Mario 128 does not feature 128 Marios. Did Mario 64 star sixty-four Marios? It is just referring to the processor of the Gamecube. It is going to be a proper sequel to Mario 64, rather than a dumb Mario Sunshine style one!!!
Miyamoto announced this at E3 in April 2004. 'Mario Sunshine was complete Kyote-Excretement,' he said. 'We thought we should Nintendo it up a bit (in other words, give it terrible graphics and an awful storyline.'
|RARE COMES CRAWLING BACK
Rare left Nintendo to draw a bit of attention to itself. Nobody ever cared about how many Banjos and Kazooies they churned out, they didn't give a doodley-daredevil about how many crystals you had to collect to open the blue door. Surprisingly, nobody seemed to notice the poor quality and unoriginality of the games. Rare left for X Box, but Bill Gates is not amused. He is tired of collecting red crystals and magic gems- he wants to shoot Grunts on Halo! He kicked Rare out and now they come crawling back to try and plague Nintendo with games for unfair amounts of money with extensions like the 'Expansion Pak' to bring in 10 bucks more. Rare are now going to try and get PS2 to accept the drivel.
|ZELDA: THE DREAM SILK
Apparently, Link and the pirates managed to land on an island where everyone had Wind Wakers. Shigeru, feeling annoyed at his own creation, decided that Link would be the first with the new fashion, the Dream Silk. Link wraps it around his index finger and it is basically played the same as the Wind Waker, but without tedious loading sequences!!!
|ZELDA: THE DREAM SILK TO FEATURE MULTIPLAYER MODE
In this next dish from the Kitchen of Miyamoto-kins, there is a multiplayer mode. In this mode, you control the likes of Mrs Tetra, Kingly Red Lion, Medley, Link, Aril, Mido, Fado, Deku Tree, Makar, Jabu, Deku the Zora King, Valu, Prince Komali. And finally, the secret character who you get if you complete the game on normal mode in under an hour (it is a short game. Yes, you thought the Wind Waker was short, well you aint knowing what short means.) Ganon is that character. The modes you get is Deathmatch, Scenario, Skirmish, and Four Swords. This is where you get to play Four Swords without buying the Four Swords game. This is theft, so make sure your curtains are drawn whilst playing in case Shigsy comes by in a helicopter. If he does, a blow to his head with a Hookshot should knock him out for a bit.
|FIRST PICCIE OF ZELDA RELEASED AT E3
For all ya Zelda fans, here is the first screenshot. We think this will be improved over time, but this is the basic character model for Link. They did it to Mario, and now they're giving Link the 'Sunshine' treatment.
Does anybody remember the Nintendo Classic called Wetrix? It was a brilliant game, a hallmark of its time, which brought Nintendo to the height of its success. It had everything that a good Nintendo game needed: great storyline, evil enemy, excellent graphics and sound effects, and finally, a cute mainie (i.e. a main character.) So many of you will jump for joy that the most anticipated game to come out on Gamecube is coming out. They will demonstrate the revolutionary game and graphics at E3.