Return to my home schooling pageGet the Goon Shows
The Goon Show was a wonderful BBC radio comedy, which ran from 1952 through 1960, and starred Peter Sellers, Harry Secombe, Spike Milligan, Ray Ellington, Max Geldray, Wallace Greenslade, and others.
In the late '60s and '70s, my family lived in Northern Alaska, where the only radio we could get was the Soviet propaganda shortwave stations and the CBC shortwave. Every evening we would tune in the CBC and try to catch another Goon Show rerun. We don't have to patiently twist knobs and try to strain the nonsense out of the static any more: the BBC has released some of the shows on CD.
The web has a wealth of interesting material on the show. Unfortunately, it seems to be scattered enough that it's hard to find the one particular item you want. I have made a list of the goon shows which the BBC has released on CD, a list of the shows on each CD, and where I can, I have provided a link to a script for each show. There is a link to purchase each of these from Amazon.
Unfortunately, the U.S. Amazon doesn't carry most of these! Your only choice is to order from Britain. Don't panic! It isn't hard. I recommend using Amazon.co.uk. They'll be a familiar choice if you're used to using amazon.com here in the U.S., and you can use your amazon.com login. Amazon.co.uk charges less than the U.S. amazon for these, and shipping from the U.K. to Alaska is only about 7 pounds, so the delivered cost of one CD will be slightly lower than the cost of getting it from Amazon.com. Since you will pay by credit card, the currency exchange will be handled for you. Just add fifty percent to the price in pounds to get a rough estimate of how many dollars it will be. Again, if you purchase via my link, Amazon will give me a small portion of their profits from the sale, so you can help me out a bit at no cost to you.
Many of the Goon Shows are available on the web, occasionally, as mp3s. The sites which have them seem to come and go, so I'm not going to bother to link to any of them. You can find them via your favorite search engine. I suggest that if you really like the Goons, you should purchase the CDs, since only brisk sales will convince the BBC to re-release more shows.
The Goon Show 1: Moriarty Where Are You?
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Moriarty Where...(this one seems to be available only in audio cassette. Darn.)
The Dreaded Batter-Pudding Hurler (of Bexhill-on-Sea)
In 1941, Constable Neddie Seagoon tries to find the dastardly batter-pudding hurler who has struck down Minnie Bannister.. Despite his best efforts, he nearly succedes.
The Jet-Propelled Guided NAAFI
Grytpype and Moriarty want to steal the jet-propelled guided NAAFI, in a sinister plot to deprive the British Army of its tea.
The Histories of Pliny the Elder
The Romans invade ancient Briton. Welsh Chieftan Caracticus Seagoon and his ancient British acquaintances wind up slaves in Rome. They join Spartcus the Gladiolus, but events get too hot for them.
The Evils of Bushey Spon
Through the miracles of oursourcing, a lamp post is not installed in Bushey Spon.
The Goon Show 2: Enter Bluebottle...
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: " Goon Show Classics: Enter Bluebottle...Lurgi Strikes Britain
Grytepype and Moriarty tell Dr. Neddy Seagoon the cure for Lurgi. Neddy: (sobs) Eeeeeeeeh Yakka-Boo, Eeeeeeeeh Yakka-Boo
Napoleon's Piano
Neddy Seagoon signs a contract to move a piano from one room to another. One room is in the Louvre ... the other is not. This one ends with a bang.
The International Christmas Pudding
Reassembling the pieces of the ancient great international Christmas pudding will ring in a new era of world peace ... unless Neddy Seagoon eats it.
The Flea
Grytpype and Moriarty sue the British Crown for fleabite. It's up to Neddy ``Samuel Peypes'' Seagoon to foil their fiendish plans. The Crown is in trouble.
The Goon Show 3: I'm Walking Backwards For Christmas
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show: I'm Walking Backwards for...The Greenslade Story
Wallace Greenslade beats out Eccles, graduate of the Neddy Seagoon school of radio announcing, for a BBC announcer's job. After much intrigue and ruin, the star announcer is ... Bluebottle?
The Treasure in the Lake
Neddy, Grytpype and Moriarty are all trying to cheat Eccles and McGool of the treasure in the lake. McGool gets the treasure and Eccles learns to swim.
Wings Over Dagenham
Neddy Seagoon invents the airplane, but can't land it till the portable airodrome is finished. Meanwhile, they'll use a steam-driven rocket to deliver the rifles to Fort Spon.
The Rent Collectors
Grytpype and Moriarty hire Neddy Seagoon to collect the rent at Death Grange.
The Goon Show 4: My Knees Have Fallen Off
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: My Knees Have...The Case of the Missing CD Plates
Neddy Seagoon is run over by a steamroller driven by Moriarty, of the Titicacan delegation. The steamroller has diplomatic plates, but not the piano!
The Nasty Affair at the Burami Oasis
The hostile Arabs are going to drink Burami Oasis. Little does Admiral Neddy Seagoon know that the oasis which floats his battleship has had its water replaced with gin.
The Man Who Never Was
World War One
The Goon Show 5: And There's More Where That Came From
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: And There's More...Nineteen-Eighty-Five
Shifting Sands
The Call of the West
The Last Smoking Seagoon
The Goon Show 6: Have A Gorilla
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Have a Gorilla...Rommel's Treasure
Ill Met By Goonlight
I Was Monty's Treble
The Seagoon Memoirs
The Goon Show 7: 'Ying tong iddle-i po'
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Ying Tong...The Whistling Spy Enigma
The Affair of the Lone Banana
The Great Tuscan Salami Scandal
Scradje
The Goon Show 8: You Have Deaded Me Again
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: You Have Deaded...The Mystery of the Marie Celeste (Solved)
The Last Tram (from Clapham)
The Spanish Suitcase
The Greatest Mountain in the World
The Goon Show 9: What Time Is It Eccles?
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: What Time Is It,...Under Two Floorboards - A Story of the Legion
The Sinking of Westminster Pier
Yehti
The Mysterious Punch-up-the-Conker
The Goon Show 10: You Can't Get The Wood You Know
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: You Can't Get...The White Box of Great Bardfield
Tales of Montmartre
The Great Bank Robbery
The Mystery of the Fake Neddie Seagoons
The script for this one doesn't seem to be online!
The Goon Show 11: He's Fallen In The Water
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: He's Fallen in...The String Robberies
The White Neddie Trade
The Spon Plague
The Mountain Eaters
The Goon Show 12: Shut Up Eccles
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Shut Up Eccles!...The Phantom Head Shaver (of Brighton)
The Lost Emperor
Drums Along the Mersey
The Mummified Priest
The Goon Show 13: It's All In The Mind You Know
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: Goon Show 13King Solomon's Mines
The Moriarty Murder Mystery
The Vanishing Room
The �1,000,000 Penny
The Goon Show 14: Needle, Nardle, Noo!
Buy it from amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Needle Nardle...The Childe Harolde Rewarde
Queen Anne's Rain
The Battle of Spion Kop
The Gold Plate Robbery
The Goon Show 15: The Goons at Christmas
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: Goon Show 15: The Goons At ChristmasYe Bandit of Sherwood Forest
The Mighty Wurlitzer
Operation Christmas Duff
A Christmas Carol
The Goon Show and Guests: Vol.16
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: "The Goon Show Classics: Goon Show and...Spon
The Curse of Frankenstein
Who Is Pink Oboe?
The �50 Cure
The Goon Show, Volume 17: The Silent Bugler
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: The Reason...The Reason Why
The Treasure in the Tower
The Plasticine Man
The Silent Bugler
The Goon Show 18 - Goons and More Guests (CD)
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Vol 18 (BBC...African Incident
Tiddleywinks
The Giant Bombardon
The Tay Bridge
Goon Show 19 - Ned's Atomic Dustbin (CD)
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Four Original...The Pevensey Bay Disaster
The Spectre of Tintagel
Shangrila Again
Ned's Atomic Dustbin
Goon Show 20: The Fear of Wages
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Fear of...The Fear of Wages
The Nadger Plague
The Great British Revolution
The Sahara Desert Statue
Goon Show 21: The Missing Battleship
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: The Goon Show Classics: Vol 21 (BBC...The Junk Affair
The Burning Embassy
The Missing Battleship
Ten Snowballs That Shook the World
Goon Show 22
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: "The Goon Show": v. 22The Thing On The Mountain
The Booted Gorilla
The Choking Horror
The Ink Shortage
Goon Again
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: The Goon AgainYear 2001 ``reworking'' of:
The Story of the Plymouth Hoe Armada
The History of Civilization
Personal Narrative
These were done using scripts which were never broadcast.
The Last Goon Show Of All/At Last The Go On Show
Buy it at amazon.co.uk: The Last Goon Show of All (BBC Radio...An hour-long goon show from 1972, with the original cast, to mark the 50th anniversary of the BBC.