Bush cheating on Richard Simmons with
PeeWee? a John Donnelly Joint Earlier today President Bush
announced that his relations with Richard Simmons were not
for any sexual pleasure and that neither he nor Mr. Simmons
is a "flamer." When questioned about his late
night habits, Mr. Bush simply commented that he spent most
nights drunk or coked out of his mind. An independent investigation has
revealed that actor Paul Reuben, a.k.a. Peewee Herman, has
been seen with bush, reportedly for the purpose of
discussing "slavery reparations" It is believed that Bush has been
seeing Mr. Reuben for many months, but the nature of their
meetings has been controversial. Democrats speculate that they are
having a party all to themselves while independent
Republicans have suggested that Bush and Reuben are
"fertilizing their corn crops." The Secretary of agriculture
reaffirmed his heterosexuality in a press conference
today. In the same press conference, Bush
insinuated (obviously not using that word) that his behavior
was understandable. And the people agree. In a national
poll, 91 percent said they wouldn't touch Mrs. Bush with a
60-foot cattle prod. The remaining nine percent consisted
largely of stupid people who lied to be funny. Bush and PeeWee get to know
eachother. � Related Articles:
Back to National
Liar
