Historical File Footage
Late 1970s
Part 1
There it goes. The last sound that you want to hear on a still dark and cold winter morning at 4:00 AM. This is the middle of the night, for Christ sake. If that goddamned alarm clock doesn�t shut the hell up I�m gonna throw it through the f'ing window. Of course these words were not heard anywhere except the inside of his skull since Nick was still in that sleep state between consciousness and dreamland. The flannel sheet and down comforter were pulled tightly around his neck and clenched tightly in his hands. His body was in the fetal position, lying on his left side. With what seemed like a great effort, Nick slowly opened his right eye just enough to see the digital numbers 4:05 glaring in a green that gave the room an eerie ghostly glow. Without changing body position, Nick turned his head over his shoulder as far as he could to see if Susan was there. Nick�s wife, Susan, fast asleep in a similar position only with her back to his, was undisturbed by the alarm. She didn�t have to worry about being late for work, since she worked for Daddy, and could show up any time she damn well pleased. A bomb could go off next to her head, and she wouldn�t blink an eye. After all, she just got home a couple of hours ago after closing Wilder�s Place, a popular country western club over the river, one of the first in the area to have the newest country and western bar amusement, the mechanical bull. She said she was going out with the girls. At least that was the message that Nick retrieved from the answering machine after returning home from work and picking up their son the previous afternoon around 3:30 PM. Nick slowly rolled upright to a sitting position and reached down under the bed for his slippers. Cold bathroom tiles are an unpleasant way to wake up, not that there is any pleasant way to wake up that early in the morning. Running on automatic, Nick dragged ass over to the closet, reached in and plucked his worn out, but just broke in comfortable, blue terry robe from the hook that was screwed into the jamb on the left side. The robe was relocated to a similar hook on the back of the master bedroom�s bathroom door. He reached into the shower and turned on the hot water full blast and stood on the dry side of the sliding glass door waiting for the water to reach the proper temperature. There�s nothing worse than the shock of getting hit with the ice cold water that lived in the pipes over night, waiting to be evicted by the force of the hot water. The shower was quick, mostly just for a wake up and to remove the bed hair look. After a quick shave, Nick dressed in his usual dark slacks, white shirt and tie which was required dress at the television station where he worked as a technician. The monogrammed black blazer, also part of the uniform, was grabbed from the door knob on his way to the kitchen where he retrieved his keys from the top of the fridge. Nick grabbed his winter coat and gloves, and within 20 minutes after first opening his eyes, was in his new 1978 Mustang, and on the road to �sign on� one of the local network affiliated television stations. Normally Nick�s mind ran on automatic, but this morning was different. A new technician was starting today and that always added some new excitement to what was normally a pretty mundane broadcast day. What added even more excitement was the fact that this new technician was a woman. A female television technician was a very rare thing these days. There were still a lot of fossils working at the station who started working there when the cameras were powered by coal. They referred to you as the FNG, f'ing new guy, even if you�d worked there for ten years. Now these same fossils not only had a f'in new technician to deal with but a female at that. Nick knew that this would bring out the �keep the broads out of broadcasting� sentiments. Sometimes it was great fun to watch the old guys squirm as new, young, and talented technicians came on board.
Around 8:30 the �normal� day shift technicians began arriving, as did the Chief Engineer, Malloy. Malloy was a great natured man of slight build with thinning reddish blond hair that he combed back on the sides. He had worked at the station since the early 50s, starting as a technician and working himself up to position of chief. Malloy was soft spoken and not a micro-manager. The console in tele-cine was just across the hall and in direct line of sight of Malloy�s office. After performing his morning administrative duties, Malloy strolled across the hall and stood next to Nick. He called over to Alan, who was at the tape counter working the crossword puzzle, a morning ritual not to be messed with. �Hey Alan, Nick. Can you guys come over here a minute?� Malloy called. �I have to give you guys a heads up about something.� �What�s up, Chief?� Alan replied, wiping the last crumb of doughnut from his face onto the sleeve of his right arm. �As you probably have heard, unless you have been vacationing on Mars or smoking McFried�s cigarettes, we have a young woman technician starting today. I know, or at least confident that you two, being FNG�s yourselves, (Nick was in his ninth year and Alan his fifth) will make her feel at home and show her the ropes. It goes without saying, but I�ll say it anyway, watch those potty mouths of yours around her, especially you,� he said as he lowered his head and looked over his half glasses directly toward Alan. �Ok? And by the way, Alan, do you actually put food in that filthy mouth of yours?� �I�ll try but no guarantees. It�s a hard habit to break, especially around here,� Nick replied. He looked into Malloy�s eyes and saw that signature twinkle and could swear that he could see the corners of his mouth breaking a smile. Malloy started towards the control room area.
Later that day, Nick has his first meeting with the new female
technician, Lori.
�Phil, where is the P and G spot loaded?� he asked. �It�s on projector two, ID slide on nine,� Phil replied. Nick wrote the numbers on the program log, then checked the transmitter log to see if it was time for the twice per hour parameter check, assuring that all of the transmitter readings were within the FCC guidelines. He had about fifteen minutes. At 1:29:20 PM, the system cue was aired by the network, and Nick rolled the spot. Thirty seconds later he took the promo ID slide on chain nine and hit the ID cart. Back to the net at first video. After logging the times on the Official Program Log, he could feel the presence of someone behind him. He turned and saw a beautiful young woman standing there. Her hair was brunette, a little longer than shoulder length, she had big brown eyes, and a young shapely body. She appeared to be in her 20s, which would make her about 12 years younger than Nick. At first sight Nick couldn�t help but to find her rather attractive. �Hi, my name is Lori.� �Welcome aboard. My name is Nick.� Lori�s eyes opened quite wide with awe as she looked around at all of the buttons, lights, and monitors in the small master control booth. �I can�t believe how much more stuff there is here than the place I came from. It will take me forever to get all of this!� �Not really,� Nick said assuredly, �Just take it one piece at a time and you�ll get it in no time. For the first six weeks that I was here I wondered if I had learned anything at my first job. Then like a light going on, I got it.� Lori smiled and gave a little sigh of relief. Nick rose out of his chair and stood beside Lori. �The next break is pretty simple. Just a film, slide, and ID cart. Want to do it?� �Are you serious? I just got here.� �Don�t worry; I won�t let you "f" it up.� As soon as the word left his lips, the OH SHIT sign flashed brightly in his mind�s eye. What he wouldn�t have given for an audio reject button right now. �I�m really sorry. That just slipped out.� �Don�t worry about it. I have three brothers, so there isn�t much that I haven�t heard or even said myself.� �I�m still pretty embarrassed. What say I get you an I�m sorry soda after the break?� �You�ve got a date. Do you really want me to do the next break? If I screw it up a million people will see it!� �And a minute later no one will give a shit. We�ll just do a make-good on Sunday afternoon. That�s what those bad movies are for. Make-Good Matinee.� They both laughed. �Besides, I will be right behind you and talk you through it. Herman is the director, so it will be fun.� �Okay. Just don�t let me "f" it up.� Nick saw a devilish twinkle in her eyes, and he knew that this was going to be just fine.
The television transmitter supervisor asks Nick if he can
stay all night to do some transmitter work. He calls his wife, Susan
to let her know that he won't be coming home until morning. His
marriage with Susan is shaky, at best.
Nick dialed his home phone number. After four rings, Susan answered. �Hello.� �Hey Susan. Listen. They want me to stay tonight to do transmitter proofs. Do you have a problem if I stay till 5:30? I will be home by 6.� �Like I give a shit. You�re never here anyway. Your son is saying �Daddy who?�� Susan really knew how to push his buttons and seemed to enjoy doing it every chance she had. �I really appreciate your support and understanding, honey. I�ll just leave the bag of money on the kitchen table when I come in and I�ll try not to bother you,� Nick said sarcastically. �Oh Nicky, while I have you on the phone, I want you to have someone work for you on the Fourth of July. Mom and Dad are having a get together at their house and I expect�� Nick cut her off with, �Look Susan, I have to get back to work. I have a break coming up and this isn�t the time or place to discuss this.� �Don�t you dare hang up on me!� Susan said sharply. �Does this sound like I�m hanging up on you?� Nick said as he slammed the receiver down in its cradle. After a few cooling down minutes, he picked back up the receiver and dialed the transmitter number. �Transmitter. Irv speakin�. It�s your dime.� �Irv, Nick. I just got off the phone with my lovely bride and it�s okay. I�ll stay. Just send down some soda and chips. Sitting here looking at the waveform monitor and the multi-burst test signal on the air sure gives me the munchies, not to mention what your sparkling conversation does to me. As they say in the good old bluegrass state, �It just don�t get no better n�at.��
Later that evening the supervisor calls Nick and tells him
that the tests will have to be postponed, so Nick goes on home at the
end of his shift. By this time he has become rather attracted to Lori
and his mind often drifted off into fantasies about her.
Even though they found it increasingly difficult sharing the same space at the same time, they still had occasional sex entirely for mutually selfish reasons. They both conceded that if it wasn�t for love at least it felt good and relieved stress. The short fantasy about Lori had Nick a bit more than a little turned on. As Nick approached his exit on the interstate he thought, wonder if she�d mind if I bothered her for a quickie before I crash. She can just call daddy and go to work late and besides, she can have plenty of time to rest up for the next one in a month or two. Nick used to sadly joke to the guys at work, �Yeah, I asked her if she wanted to do it and she said �Not this year, I have a headache.��
At approximately 2:20 AM Nick pulled the Mustang into the driveway, turned off the engine and lights, and went up the steps to the front door of his �palace.� He fumbled briefly with his bundle of keys, trying to identify the house key in the yellow glow of the front porch light. �Hey Susan, you still up?� he called. There was no response, so he continued up the stairs to the first level. There was no sight of Susan. At the top of the stairs, Nick put his keys at their home on top of the fridge, turned right and proceeded to their son�s room. The door was opened. Nick entered, as he did every night when he got home, to kiss his son on the forehead and tell him that he loved him. He walked to the bed and noticed that the blankets were mussed and there were some toys on the bed, but not his son. What in the "f" is going on here? he thought. He felt the adrenaline rush overcome over him, and his heart began to pound hard in his chest. He could feel the tight feeling in his throat and his respiration quickened. The initial fear of foul play quickly passed and was replaced by the feeling that what was more likely was that Susan was doing some fooling around. �I�ll fix her ass.� Nick said angrily. Without undressing he got into bed where he lied perfectly quiet and still. He could hear his heart beating loudly in his ears, and he could feel his pulse pound in his arms and legs. After what seemed like hours, but in actuality was only about thirty minutes, he heard a key working in the front door and heard the door open as the wind guard attached to the bottom scraped against the floor tiles. "Hey thanks,� Nick heard Susan say. �I had a great time.� �Me too, babe,� A twangy male voice said. �We gonna get together again some time soon?� �I hope so. I�ll have to let you know. Ya know, I don�t get out too often, so this really felt good for a change.� The male voice said, �I gotta tell you, you�re one ball of fire after you get a couple drinks down your neck.� �Speaking of ball,� Susan said, �you ain�t seen nothing yet.� �Just make sure that next time you wear those tight jeans again. By the way, did you spray them things on?� �A girl�s gotta keep a guy guessing, doesn�t she?� �Just don�t make it too long before you call me, okay? I�ll keep my engine running.� �Get out of here and go home. I�ll call ya, I promise, and it won�t be long...or is it?� Nick heard them both laugh as the door shut. He could hear a car drive away at the same time he heard Susan�s footsteps on the stairs. He could see the lights going off as she proceeded down the hall to the bedroom. Nick could see her form at the doorway as she felt around for the light switch and switched it on. Lori turned her head towards the bed and saw Nick. �Jesus Christ, Nick. You scared the shit out of me. What the hell are you doing here? I thought you were at work.� Nick got out of the bed and stood six inches from Susan�s face. �That�s pretty obvious. The question should be where the "f" have you been? And while we�re playing twenty f'ing questions, did you and Don f'ing Juan have a good time playing with each other?� �I didn�t do anything wrong. I just went out for a few laughs with a couple of friends.� �And while you were out laughing your pants off, who is watching the baby?� �He�s fine. He�s over at Paul and Beth�s sleeping over with Todd. Why do you care if I go out? You�re out till 2 a.m. a lot of the time.� �You bet your ass I am, except I�m out there working! You know, a job? Just something silly that I do to keep you in denim spray paint and beer. Jesus, Susan this isn�t about me, it�s about you f'ing around on me. So, how many times have you and Mr.Smooth played hide the salami behind my back?� �You sure are a paranoid shit, aren�t ya?� �So, I suppose that in happy little Susan world, your husband is married, but not you, right? Just get the "f" out of my face! I�m out�a here. Don�t worry, I�ll try not to get in your way while I decide what I need to do.�
It is now the night on which the tests are reschuled. Nick
finishes his shift and is ready too settle in and wait several hours
until sign-off, when the tests will begin.
Nick thought that he had thrown all of the papers away after the program. This wasn�t trash, but a folded piece of paper with his name on it. �What the hell is this? I was just here 5 minutes ago, and there wasn�t anything here.� He pulled off the small piece of tape that held the note closed and unfolded it. Nick, he read to himself, I know you have a few hours before you need to do the proofs, and I thought that if you didn�t mind driving a few miles you could come over to my place, and I could give you that thank you bev. I�ll be up till about 1, so if you want to come over, here are the directions. Lori. The note contained detailed directions and a map. This was a dream, right? His heart was racing, and he could feel a flush come over his face. Traffic was light, and Nick couldn�t help but fantasize that Lori would be greeting him at the door dressed in a sheer teddy and holding a drink out to him. He imagined that she had the same feelings for him as he had for her. He forced himself back to the reality that the only thing that is, is what is. Lori simply invited him over for something to drink and a couple of hours of company to pass the time. That�s all. He shook his head and smiled at the idiotic and pathetic way that his mind was playing with him. Lori�s exit was coming up in about one mile. Nick turned on the overhead map light and with one hand unfolded the directions. When he entered the hallway, he could smell the lingering aromatic m�lange of this evening�s dinners and the perfumes of the occupants. His heart pounded as he walked to the second floor and stood in front of apartment number 12. He could hear the sounds of country music coming from the other side of the door. Well, here goes. He thought to himself as he knocked on the door. After what seemed like an eternity but in reality was maybe ten seconds, he saw the doorknob turn and the door open. �Hey, glad you decided to make it.� Lori welcomed. �Come on in and make yourself comfortable.� �Thanks for inviting me. Sure beats the hell out of sitting around doing nothin� for three hours.� Nick was used to seeing Lori in business clothing, so the sight of her in tight Levi�s, a loose fitting white oxford blouse, bare footed and her hair in a pony tail was surely a treat for his eyes. Nick felt overdressed since he was still in his work clothes, which was business attire, complete with tie. �Kick off your shoes and loosen your shirt and tie. Make yourself at home. I�ll get us a couple of beers, unless you�d like something stronger.� �As much as I�d like to, I don�t want to pass out and make you have to carry me back to the station.� �You�re right. We can�t have you missing your date with Irv and getting arrested by the F.C.C.� With that Lori turned and walked toward the kitchen. Nick settled into the armed wing chair while loosening his tie. What a great place Lori had. Although the living room lamps were on, there were aromatic candles burning on the end tables and a large round candle burning on the coffee table. There was a fireplace with the logs in position, just waiting for the perfect winter evening to warm the heart and home. Through the large glass door that opened onto a patio he could see a lighted geyser fountain in the middle of the lake. His thoughts were interrupted as he heard from the kitchen the distinctive hiss and pop of a beer bottle cap being propelled from its long necked launching pad. �Ya want this in a glass?� Lori asked. �Are you drinking yours from a glass?� �Not me, I�m just a plain ole country girl.� �Well, I got so much class it�s coming out my ass. Bottle is fine for me too.� Lori giggled as she popped the top off of the second bottle. Nick loved the look and feel of her apartment. He wished he didn�t have to go back to work. Lori handed Nick a napkin and the beer bottle. �Thanks. This is great.� �You�re welcome. It�s the least I could do after all the help and support that you have given me since I started.� Lori sat in the corner of the sofa where there were two large fluffy pillows. She tucked her right leg under her body and her left leg hung over the edge. Damn, she�s beautiful, Nick thought. He held up his bottle in a salutary gesture and Lori did the same. They leaned toward each other until the bottle lips clinked as they gently touched. Nick wished badly that the lips touching were his and Lori�s. Then they both took their first gulp at the same time. �This sure hits the spot.� Nick said as he wished for quite a different spot that he would like to hit right now. �So�, Nick said with a slight sigh as he relaxed back into the chair, �now that we have some peace and quiet and about five less nosy people around, tell me all about yourself.�
After a period of chit-chat and some drink.....
Nick could tell that Lori was loosening up a bit. When he got up to get the beers, Lori reached behind her, turned off the lamp and stretched out her legs on the sofa. Nick brought the bottle to her. The small candle behind her was the perfect back light, and the candle on the coffee table gave her face a warm glow. �Nick, is it getting a little warm in here or is it my imagination?� �Yeah, it�s getting a little warm in here, all right.� �Can you please slide the glass door open a bit and on the way back, how about turning the other lamp off, too, okay?� Nick unlocked the door and slid it opened about six inches. He could hear the serene sounds of the crickets and the fountain. As he started back over to the wing chair Lori motioned him over to the sofa with a beckoning move of her index finger. As he approached the sofa, she patted the cushion showing him where to sit. There wasn�t much room between her outstretched legs and the edge so he sat sort of side saddled on the sofa�s edge with his left arm on the back of the sofa. He took a couple good chugs of the beer and set the bottle on the coffee table. Lori smiled. �I think it would be all right for you to take the tie off and kick off your shoes. The boss isn�t here.� She didn�t have to say it twice. Nick removed his tie completely and kicked off his loafers. He turned back to Lori to see her unbuttoning the second button of her blouse.
It is now time for the station Christmas party. The family
pictures are taken. Nick, Susan and a couple other families
are seated at one of the many large round tables in the studio.
Susan took her seat and as Nick was about one third into his, Susan asked, �So, Nicky, how about buying your wife a drink?� As close as he could answer without appearing angry or sarcastic, he answered, �Sure, what�ll it be?� while at the same time thinking hemlock and soda? �I think I�d like a glass of wine.� Susan answered. The first thing that came into Nick�s mind was Let�s see�what goes best with asshole�then aloud, �Red or white?� �White,� she decided, �and can you add a splash of soda? I just love the bubbles.� This immediately replayed in his mind an earlier time in their lives when champagne played a non-traditional part in one of their more playful moments, and how she and her cowboy might be enjoying that right now. He felt his face turning red with impending rage as he turned to go to the beverage bar. On his way past the buffet table, he noticed Lori sitting at a table across the studio. Nick recognized all but one of the people at her table. The one that he didn�t recognize had his left arm around her shoulder and holding her rather closely. That was all he needed to see right now. All he wanted to do right now was to go home and lose himself with his friend, Jose� Cuervo. As this was not a viable alternative at the moment, he proceeded to the beverage bar were he met Alan who was nursing a can of beer and listening to Herman and the boys play the oldies. �Ya havin� a good time, Nick?� Alan almost yelled to be heard over the music. �Oh sure. We�re sitting over there with Larry and family. C�mon over and liven things up.� �Nah, looks like Susan is doing a good enough job of entertaining your table over there. The best show is from here, at least as long as the hooch supply holds up. What�ll ya have, pardner?� �I need something stronger than what they have here, but I�ll settle for a couple beers before I go back to the table. You have any idea who that is over there with Lori?� �Uh, uh. All I know is that she got out of a car with Florida plates with that dude. Want me to do some re-con for ya?�
At the party, Nick learns of a job opportunity in Washington, D.C.
He tells Lori about the decision that he has to make.
�Lori, I was talking to Larry at the party, and there may be an opportunity for me to change jobs and move to D.C. You are the first one that I have talked to about this. I feel like I need to bounce this off of someone, and I�d like it to be you.� �Shouldn�t you be talking this over with your family first?� �I can�t talk to Susan about this right now. All she will do is blow up. Besides, if I decide to do this, she won�t be moving with me.� �Ouch!� Lori winced. �I didn�t realize that things were so bad at the home front. I guess you gotta do what you feel is right.� �I can�t stay in this relationship and live like this anymore. The biggest problem is having to leave my son, but it can�t be good for him to be living in such a hostile environment. I love him so much.� �Actually, I have some choices that I have to make regarding where my life is going, too.� Lori said. �My high school friend, well, truth be told he was much more than just a friend, showed up after six years. That�s who you saw me with at the party. Right after graduation he went to Florida to study something about ocean life. He always was good at biology and stuff like that. Anyway, he graduated and landed a great job doing research at a private institution near Clearwater. He wants me to move there with him and maybe get married. He has some contacts at a TV station in Tampa, and they may have a job for me there. He�s leaving in a few days and wants me to come down and stay with him. I have a week of vacation time, so I think I�m going to look around and check it out.� �Lori, that sounds great for you. Good luck.� �You too, Nick.�
Nick wakes up and comes upstairs to tell Susan about the job
offer in D.C.
�What brings you out of the cave so early? Surely not to kiss your gorgeous wife good-bye and to bid her a good day. Or did you just get home from taking your teen love to school?� Susan�s acid tongue and sarcasm made what he had to tell her even easier. Her hair was still wet and hung straight down the back of her embroidered western shirt. She unbuttoned and unzipped her tight jeans so that she could tuck her shirt in. Nick couldn�t imagine, considering how tight her jeans were that there was even room for a shirt tail in there. His sarcasm took over as he thought that there was always room when she wanted something to get into her pants, but he held his tongue this time. He could see the top edge of her bikini underwear as she tucked, zipped and buttoned. �I have to tell you something important.� �Well make it fast. I have to get to work.� �You can wait a few goddamn minutes. Daddy isn�t going to fire you for being late.� �All right.� She whined in protest �What�s so damn important?� �I wanted to tell you that I am moving.� �Moving. What do you mean, moving? The bar in Hotel Basement isn�t good enough for you any more? Moving where?� �Away.� �Quit f'ing with me. I don�t have time for this.� �That�s your problem, Susan. You never have time for what is really important. I�m moving to Washington. I have a job there.� �You have a what, where? And what the "f" am I and Adam supposed to do?� �That�s Adam and I. You always put yourself first, don�t you. I have a job that starts in three weeks.� �Well, "f" me!� Susan yelled. �Ain�t that just like you. Gets a little tough and you run away. Where am I supposed to live? I can�t pay for this place, even with child support. Boy, are you going to pay, too.� �I guess we�ll have to sell this place, and you�ll just have to get an apartment. I�ll just take whatever is mine and leave everything else with you.� �You bet your ass, you will. By the time I�m done with you you�ll be lucky to have your ass!� Susan screamed. �I have a good idea, let Adam come with me, and you and your shit-kicker can go out and make your own home on the range.� With that, Susan picked up her coffee mug and threw it at Nick. Nick ducked in time to hear it crash and shatter along with the microwave door. The next thing he heard was a loud �F" you!� as the door slammed and shortly thereafter the screeching of tires. Nick turned his head to see the damage and saw Adam standing in the kitchen doorway holding a teddy bear in one hand and his favorite blanket in the other. How long had he been standing there and how much did he hear? As loud as Susan was, the next county must have heard. Nick picked Adam up and held him close. His eyes welled up with tears as he carried him back to his room and sat with him on his little bed. �Adam, Daddy has something to talk to you about.� �Are you going away, Daddy? Can I go with you?� �Yes, sweetheart, Daddy is moving away, and I�m sorry, but you can�t come with me right now.� �When will I see you?� �Daddy will be getting a really nice place and I won�t be that far away. You can come and visit, and we will be able to do all kinds of things together and have a lot of fun. There will be beaches to go to and zoos. Lots of stuff. And I will write to you all the time, ok?� �Ok, Daddy. I love you.� �Daddy loves you too. How about we guys go out and get some pancakes, just me and you?� �I like pancakes!� Nick helped Adam dress and out they went. Nick knew that starting this very moment, every second that he could spend with Adam from now on would be the best ever.
Nick and Lori continue to follow their own paths for two
decades and find themselves in very different places in their lives
than where they were when they parted. What series of events allow
their paths to cross again and what risks are they willing to take
to to get together again? I guess you'll have to get the book to find
out the answer.
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