Chapter Forty One: Fighting For the Right to be Crazy
(We now find ourselves on the battle-stricken fields of the Pelennor, where still the forces of good battle those of evil and where our friends ride to save their friends and loved ones. It is Merry and Eowyn who find themselves up against the greatest peril. After bringing down one of the enormous Oliphaunts, the two were knocked off their horse, and now Eowyn, whether it is by chance or fate, finds herself in a battle with the dreaded King of the Nazgul.)
Nazgul: I will kill you.
Eowyn: We shall see about that one.
Nazgul: No man can defeat me!
(They continue to fight and just as it seems that Eowyn shall lose, the brave Meriadoc comes to her rescue, stabbing the Witch-King of Angmar in the back just long enough for Eowyn to stab him in the face, destroying him.)
Eowyn: That�s what you get for calling me a man, fool!
(Yeah! Stick it to the Man! Anyway, now Eowyn struggles to the aid of her dying Uncle Theoden, until later when she shall be discovered.)
(Meanwhile, Aragorn and the rest of the Kinda-Sorta But Not Really Grey Company have arrived with the armies of the dead who are now on their way to the Pelennor to open a serious can of whooparse on the enemy. Upon reaching the fields, Aragorn just happens to nearly be run over by none other than the infamous Stevie.)
Aragorn: (dodges horse) Stevie?
Stevie: (comes back around on horse) Uhh�..hi Aragorn. How�s it going?
Aragorn: (extremely peeved) For Valar�s sake, woman! I sent you half way across Middle-earth to keep you safe and you deliberately disobey me and I find you here!
Stevie: Aragorn, I have a good reason for�
Aragorn: I don�t want to hear it!
Stevie: (getting angry) Fine! You know what? If you�re so convinced that I can�t defend myself, then fight me.
Aragorn: (stares at her) What?
Stevie: (getting off horse, sword in hand) Fight me, you mangy excuse for a king!
Aragorn: This is foolishness. I will not fight you, Stevie.
Stevie: (walks up and slashes Marieke at him) Fight me.
Aragorn: (dodges and crouches) What do you think you are doing? Have you gone mad?
Stevie: No, you Highnessness, I am entirely sane. It is you who appears to be a tad on the mad side�..angry that is.
(The two start fighting with their swords. Aragorn is obviously being better and more experienced at this than Stevie, but she is holding her own very well. The longer this goes on the angrier the two become and it seems as if the two, out of some sort of random and blind rage, might actually want to hurt each other. Then, just as Stevie went to swing her sword at Aragorn, a dark figure jumped out between them. The figure we recognize as Harper, now clad in the black livery of Gondor, with her sword, Brone, in hand.)
Harper: (furious) What the hell do you two think you�re doing?
Stevie: (shocked, drops sword) Harper?
Harper: (glares) Yep, it�s me. Though I am in no mood for touchy-feely reunions right now. (to Stevie) Why are you here and not in Lothlorien? (to Aragorn) And why are you trying to kill each other?
Stevie: I came to save Halbarad. I�
Harper: (sternly) I know that. It isn�t your duty to save him. (turns back to Aragorn) And you?
Aragorn: She provoked it!
Harper: (glares) You�re a grown man! You should know better! And I am sick of these lame excuses. You should know better than to attack Stevie, even if she wanted you to.
Aragorn: (bows his head) I am sorry, you are right. Forgive me?
Harper: You were forgiven before you even did it. Don�t apologize to me though, I want you two to apologize to each other.
Stevie: I�m sorry, Aragorn. I should have done as you said.
Aragorn: I must apologize for my behavior. I never should have become so irrational as to attack you, though I will not apologize for my anger. I feel it is just.
Harper: Well, now that we�re all fine and dandy, you (to Aragorn) get to go save the world, and you (to Stevie) are coming back to the city with me.
Stevie: But what about Halbarad? I promised Van that I would keep him safe!
Harper: That has already been seen to. I sent Boromir after him. They are both safely within city walls.
(Stevie sighs with relief and then consents to follow Harper back to the White City. Though first, Harper informs Stevie that they have to make a wee bit of a side trip, so they grab Stevie�s horse and walk across the battle field, which is still relatively active. The two locate the wounded Eowyn and Merry and with great difficulty, manage to get Eowyn atop Stevie�s horse. Harper carries Merry back to the City where they take the two to the houses of healing to be looked after. There they find Boromir and Halbarad visiting the still-unconscious Faramir.)
Harper: Any change, love?
Boromir: (frowning) He was moaning in his sleep before, but other than that, no. Ah! (perks up a tad) I see that you have brought Stevie safely back.
Stevie: (smiles) Yep. Nice to see you again, Cap�n Crunch. Hey Halbarad! Nice to see that you�re alive and kicking!
Halbarad: As opposed to being dead? Aye, I think that is a nice thing to see also.
(Just then a servant for the Steward�s comes in, with a message for none other than Harper, informing her that she is to report to the Lord Denethor immediately. She shrugs at the puzzled looks of her companions, having no idea what the Steward wants of her. Boromir seems slightly worried, but she reassures him that she can handle herself and makes way to the Citadel, where she finds Denethor in his hall, sitting in his chair. He seems quite pleased to see her.)
Denethor: (hugging her) Ah, my girl, wonderful of you to come so quickly.
Harper: (smiles) I know I don�t particularly enjoy being left to wait, and I assumed you would feel the same, so I came with utmost haste.
Denethor: So I see you are as smart as you are pretty, but come, I must speak with you of matters of great importance.
Harper: Such as, my Lord?
Denethor: I fear that over the past several years I have made several grave mistakes, my dear. They have all lead up to what is happening now. My foolishness and doubt in so many matters have caused great problems, and now I shall lose my son Faramir, and he shall never know how much I truly cared for him because I never showed it.
Harper: He does know, my Lord.
Denethor: Don�t call me that. Some day soon you�ll be my son�s wife; my daughter. You may call me father if you wish it.
Harper: (smiles, barely concealing a smirk) Aye, Father. You must know that Faramir does know you love him.
Denethor: Aye! But he went out and nearly got himself killed because of the way I�ve treated him! What kind of a father am I?
Harper: One who�s made mistakes, but all fathers do that.
Denethor: No, no, it is too late. That is why I asked you to come here. I must ask you, seeing as you will soon be the Lady of Gondor, that you will care for my sons as best you are able.
Harper: Of course I will, Father.
Denethor: And you should lead Boromir in the right direction. He�s like me too much in his brashness. Always thinking with that sword of his, never with his mind! But I see when he�s around you it�s different.
Harper: I shall care for him, and Faramir, you needn�t worry.
Denethor: (in a disturbingly good mood) Good! Than I needn�t worry about things after I�m gone! Thank you, Hannah.
Harper: Wait, after you are gone? What are you talking about? Denethor?
Denethor: (ignoring her) Guards! Please escort this lovely young lady back down to the Houses of Healing. Thank you. (to Harper) Goodbye, and thank you so much for all you�ve done.
(And so Harper�s literally dragged all the way back to the Houses of Healing where Boromir finds her in a panic. She hurriedly explains that Denethor intends on killing himself, but lo and behold, no sooner than they step outside the Houses of Healing do they see the flaming body of the Steward leap from the walls of the Citadel to the rubble of the First Circle.)
Boromir: (shocked and horrified) No!
(Harper is equally as upset because, despite the fact that the guy was a mentally disturbed pyromaniac, she really kind of liked him. The two find themselves on the front steps to the Houses of Healing, holding each other and crying. Stevie sees them from the doorway, but decides it best to leave them be. She goes back to Faramir in the other room and sits in a chair beside his bed.)
Stevie: (murmuring to herself) So passes Denethor, son of Ecthelion.
Stevie: This really is war�..indeed. (to the unconscious Faramir) But you know all about it, don�t you? Been fighting for so long it�s routine�..but that shall end soon enough. Why? (smirks to herself) Because, my ill and unconscious comrade, I�m going to get you a girlfriend!
