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• English Class
• Eureka, Eureka
  
• Why In A Hurry
  
• First Child
  
• A Professor and The Waiter
  
• A Special Menu
  
• A Phone Conversation
  
• Strangers on The Phone
  
• While A Baby's Crying
  
• The New Housekeeper

English Class

    Two English class students of an Indonesian-American Training Institute course in Jakarta are invited to step forward by their English instructor to practice "conversation". The first guy is tall and skinny while the other one short and ample. They stand face to face in front of the classroom before the conversation begins.

    The tall guy pretending himself to be an American tourist with his arms on his hips, opens the talk like a fluent speaker.

    "Hello there, I'm from Boston. Where do you hail from, my little stranger?"
    But the other guy doesn't give any response at all.

    "Hey, shorty, do you understand me?" the tall guy asks.
    The short guy slowly steps forward facing so close to the tall guy, looks up at him with big eyes, then breaks the silence....
    "Yeesss, I stand under you..., skinny!!!"

Eureka, Eureka

  Almost every high school kids must have been familiar with the name Archimedes, a Greek scientist known for his famous physical law, the Archimedes' Law.

  But Danny seems to be the one who has never heard the name before due to his absence from his class many times. So the teacher assigns him to read the story on Archimedes at home and lets him recite it in front of his classmates the following day.

  "Archimedes seems to be very excited, jumps out from his bath tub, and goes outside his house and into the street, running and shouting all the way: Eureka! Eureka!," he begins to recite the story in such a loud voice, without mentioning any of its prelude at all.

  "Hold a second, Danny," the teacher interrupts him, and asks him whether he knows the meaning of "Eureka".

  "Yes, sir, 'Eureka' means 'I have found it'...," he answers with confidence.

  "Very well, then, what is it that he has found?" the teacher asks him further.
  "Well, something that he has lost before... and I'd say it's ... a soap."

Why In A Hurry

    Alan is about to enter the gate door to his office building when a boy seems to appear out of nowhere and asks him what time it is.  Alan looks at his watch and answers shortly, "It's a quarter to nine now...."

The boy thanks him, and says, "At nine o'clock sharp, you may kiss my ass!" And he runs away as fast as he can.

    "You bloody bastard!" Alan feels so despised that he starts to chase the boy in order to give him a lesson.  But another colleague of him stops him on the way at once.

    "What's up, Alan? Why are you in such a hurry?" his colleague asks.

    While gasping his breath and pointing out his finger in the direction where the boy is last seen, he tells his colleague why he is being so annoyed.

    "You know what, after I told him what time it was, he said that at nine o'clock sharp I could kiss his ass...."

    His colleague smiles and while looking at his watch he says, "Well, you still have 10 minutes to go, why in a hurry?"

First Child

    The phone at a maternity hospital reception desk rings and a nurse reaches out to pick it up.

    A man's voice is immediately heard yelling on the other end of the line....

    "Hello, you must help me! My wife's gonna have a baby! Please send us an ambulance at once...."

    The nurse advises him, "Calm down, okay? Is this her first child?"

    "No! I'm her husband..." is the answer.

    "???"

A Professor and The Waiter

    A professor is about to leave a restaurant when a waiter stops him at the door.

    "Excuse me, sir, I'm sure you did forget something," the waiter tells him smilingly.

    "Did I? But I'm also sure I gave you a tip only a while ago. Don't you remember that by the way?" the professor protests.

    "Yes, you're right, sir... but you still forgot to eat your meal that you ordered."

A Special Menu

    An old guy in an old restaurant put an order for his lunch with some comments that he is actually on his diet.

    "Hey, miss, I don't understand why..., I ordered a plate of special fried rice, but I don't see here any bits of egg, fish or shrimp, and even the rice is not fried at all," he put his claim over to the waitress.

    "Yes, sir, but this is what we used to refer to as "special" in this restaurant, because... you'd only pay 'all you can eat'."

A Phone Conversation

A dialog follows right after a phone ring.

    "Hello, is this Andy?"
    "Yeah, I'm Andy here."
    "Well, your voice doesn't sound like Andy's...."
    "I'm Andy anyway, trust me."
    "Really? I still doubt it. You must be someone else."
    "No. I swear, I'm Andy by all means."
    "Well, my friend, could you lend me some money? Fifty thousand rups would be enough, and I promise to return it to you by next Monday."
    "That's okay, ... I'll tell him when he gets back home...."
    "???"

Strangers on The Phone

   "Hello, Eve, I've planned to meet you after class this evening," a young man's voice is heard through the phone line, "and I also intend to stay the night at your place," he implies with full enthusiasm.

   "Well, that's fine, Adam, I'll be very anxious to spend the night with you..." is the answer.

   "Hey, I'm not Adam by the way," he exclaims.

   "Well, I'm not Eve either...," and she hangs up.

While A Baby's Crying

   A young father is pushing a baby carriage down the sidewalk one afternoon. The baby is continuously crying and perhaps this has caused him to become somewhat annoyed.

   A young lady who is passing by, hears him say clearly, "Come on, be patient Jimmy, please calm down and control yourself...."

   She stops right away and says to him, "Excuse me, sir, I'm a student of psychology and I also practice teaching mental-retarded kids. May be I could be of some help for you... if you don't mind."

   Then she turns over to the baby and speaks so softly, "Well, Jimmy darling... don't cry any more, please. You must have pity for your father who cares you so much... Calm down, okay?" and simultaneously she gives the baby a kiss.

   "Sorry, miss..." the father interrupts at once, "the name is Dolly... and she's a girl... Jimmy's my name...."

   "Oh, my...."

The New Housekeeper

   Billy comes home from school, rings the doorbell, and is met by Nanny, their new housekeeper, who opens the door for him. Billy's mother is also there to meet him and Billy gives her a kiss.

   Nanny smiles at them while standing by their side, and Billy's mother says to Billy, "Billy dear, why don't you give Nanny also a kiss, she has been so nice to you ever since, hasn't she?"

   Nanny is still smiling but Billy is so reluctant and only says to his mother in a low voice, "I hate to tell you this, mom... I am afraid she would slap my face, too... as she did to daddy when daddy wanted to kiss her the other day...."