 |
 |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
DIVORCE COURT SCENE :
One train which was going peacefully on the rail-tracks suddenly deviated from the tracks and went to the fields nearby and then came back on the tracks. The passengers were horrified. On the next Railway station the driver was caught : He was found to be a Sardar. He was questioned . He explained that there was a man standing on the tracks and he was not moving from there even after lots of honks etc., Then authorities questioned : Sardarji are you mad! just to save life of one person you put life of so many passengers under danger.You should have overran that person . Sardar said : Exactly, that is what i also decided, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came very close.
Bantu returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father." Dad, today we had a Spelling Class - All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am Sardar?" "No son, that's because you are intelligent. " Bantu seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could only count from 1-10, I could count from 1 to 20. Is this because I am Sardar ??" "No son, that's because you are intelligent," replies his father. Happy with the answer, Bantu poses another question to his father, "Dad, today we had Medical Examination, all the other boys were shorter than me, I was atleast twice their height. Is that because I am Sardar ??" The father replies, "No son, that's because you are 31 years old."
Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain Banta Singh welcoming you to Punjab Airways. We apologize for the four day delay in taking off, owing to bad weather and some overtime I had put in at the bakery. This is flight one two six flight to New Delhi. Landing in Delhi is not guaranteed, but we will end up somewhere in the East. And if luck is in our favor, we may even be landing on your village! Punjab Airways has an excellent record for safety. In fact our safety standards are so high that even the terrorists are afraid to fly with us! It is with pleasure I announce that starting this year over 50% of our passengers have reached their destination. (I presume that the other 50% were the terrorists themselves!!!) For the ones that don't quiet make it, Punjab Airways staff have all the requisite experience for consoling the next-of-kin. Our Stewardesses Bubbly and Goldie will be happy to brief you on our out-of-court settlement policies. If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange to turn them off ! To make your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable, we serve complimentary tea and biscuits ! For our religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you find out if there really is a God! We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie
will not be shown as we forgot to record it from the
television. There is no-smoking in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow down! Life jacket are positioned under your seats and free bathing costumes are made available to the aunties and swimming shorts to the uncles, for emergency jumps! In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible for the best view. If, however, we go a little too close do let us know. Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark ! Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take off and fasten your belt. For those of you who can't find a seat belt, kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And for those of you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a flight attendant for your suitcase. Sorry, but I won't be flying with you today because I have to attend my nephew's wedding. But please make yourself at home and help yourself to the cock pit. Thank you for choosing Punjab Airways. BON VOYAGE.
A sardar had arrived early at the stadium for
the first cricket game of the series between local rival
teams only to realize that he had left his ticket at
home. Not wanting to miss any of the first inning, he
went to the ticket booth and got in a long line for
another seat.After an hour's wait he was just a few feet
from the booth when a voice called out, "Hey,
Balbir!"
Having lost his donkey a Sardarji, got down to
his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him
and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you
thanking God for ?"
Do you know What Surdarji will do after taking
Xerox ?
A Sardar took an answering machine home and fixed it home somewhere in Rajasthan, but two days later disconnected it because he was getting complaints like "Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai" (Idiot! He's taking the phone and saying he's not there.)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
 |
 |
