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 The Best of 2000, MovieWatch picks the 'top 12' of the year:  
Not only did I see fewer 2000 movies (down to 86 from 94 in 1999), but the quality is dropping too.  I only rated 19 movies at  3 1/2 or 4 stars (down from 27 in 1999).  Here are my favorites: 

1) Traffic

2) The Perfect Storm

3) Cast Away

4) The Contender

5) Almost Famous

6) Pay it Forward

7) Nurse Betty

8) The Cell

9) Frequency

10) Remember the Titans

11) Meet the Parents

12) Best of Show 

 

 

 Here are the 2000 Movies in alpha order.

 

    Click on the title for comments.

       

 

6th Day, The

28 Days 2_stars SML.gif (970 bytes)

Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle, The 

All the Pretty Horses

Almost Famous  

American Psycho 2_and_a_half_stars SML.gif (1032 bytes)

Art of War, The

Bait

Beach, The 2_stars SML.gif (970 bytes) 

Best of Show

Big Kahuna, The 1 and a half stars.gif (981 bytes)

Black and White 3_stars SML.gif (1052 bytes)

Boiler Room 2_stars SML.gif (970 bytes)

Boys Don't Cry 3_stars SML.gif (1052 bytes)

Cast Away

Cell, The

Chocolat

Contender, The

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

Dinosaur

Dr. T and the Women

Dracula 2000

Erin Brockivitch 3_stars SML.gif (1052 bytes)

Exorcist, The

Eye of the Beholder 1 and a half stars.gif (981 bytes)

Final Destination 3_and_a_half_stars SML.gif (1049 bytes)

Finding Forrester

Frequency

Get Carter

Girl, Interrupted 2_and_a_half_stars SML.gif (1032 bytes)

Gift, The

Gladiator

Gone in 60 Seconds

Gossip

High Fidelity 3_and_a_half_stars SML.gif (1049 bytes)

Hollow Man

Holy Smoke 1 and a half stars.gif (981 bytes)

In Crowd, The

Jesus' Son

Legend of Bagger Vance, The

Legend of Drunken Master, The

Me, Myself and Irene

Meet the Parents

Men of Honor

Mission to Mars 3_stars SML.gif (1052 bytes)

Mission Impossible 2

Ninth Gate, The 2_stars SML.gif (970 bytes)

Nurse Betty

O Brother, Where Art Thou? 

Patriot, The

Pay it Forward

Perfect Storm, The

Pitch Black 2_stars SML.gif (970 bytes)

Pollock

Proof of Life

Red Planet

Remember The Titans

Replacements, The

Requiem for a Dream

Return to Me 3_and_a_half_stars SML.gif (1049 bytes)

Rules of Engagement 2_stars SML.gif (970 bytes)

Scary Movie

Scream 3 2_and_a_half_stars SML.gif (1032 bytes)

Shaft 1 and a half stars.gif (981 bytes)

Shanghai Noon

Snow Falling on Cedars 3_stars SML.gif (1052 bytes)

Small Time Crooks

Snatch

Space Cowboys

State and Main

Sweet and Lowdown 2_and_a_half_stars SML.gif (1032 bytes) 

Tao of Steve, The

Thirteen Days

Time Code

Titan A. E. 

Traffic

U-571

Unbreakable

Vertical Limit

Virgin Suicides, The

Watcher, The

What Lies Beneath

Whipped

Whole Nine Yards, The 3_stars SML.gif (1052 bytes)

Wonder Boys, The 3_stars SML.gif (1052 bytes)

X Men

Yards, The

You Can Count on Me

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Movie Star Rating

Comments

Pollock 3 Pollock is a biography of modern painter Jackson Pollock, brilliantly portrayed by Ed Harris.  Ed directed as well, just not as brilliantly.   It is, however, especially interesting to watch Harris create paintings quickly before our eyes.   Harris is either: A) an amazing artist himself who studied hard to be able to duplicate Pollock's modern art style OR B) this film uses incredible special effects OR C) Pollock's work is pretty easy to mimic.  I am leaning towards option C.  His style is appealing, but it also looks just like the design on the lamp shade sitting on the end table in the house I grew up in.  (Whoops, need to correct that last sentence, you should never use a preposition to end a sentence with).   

I enjoyed the film, although not nearly as much as the real critics did, this is showing up on top ten lists around the country.  The problem is that all we know about Pollock is that he paints a lot and drinks a lot, we aren't given any clues as to why. 

 

Chocolat 3.5 This film is getting a lot of attention, including Miramax's annual "spend a fortune on Variety ads to get our coolest movie nominated for an Oscar campaign"  (it worked). 

It is a fable in the truest sense, and I liked it from beginning to end.  Chocolat is composed perfectly to give a sense of timelessness, it really doesn't matter what year it is.  The film is full of wonder and joy, and if you just want to get away from it all, this is a good one to see. 

 

You Can Count on Me 3 This is a very well written film, characters are multifaceted, they react to the situation, not to the character summary jotted down in the script.  The relationships are true, people interact in a genuine fashion in this film.  The director avoids the typical Hollywood clichés and substitutes insight and meaning instead.  Refreshing. 

 

The Gift 3 I read a true crime case where a citizen reports to police that he had a dream in which he sees the details, including the perpetrator, of a crime.   The cops decided that he must be the bad guy, since he knew all the details.  That's what you get for trying to help.  The Gift explores similar territory, in this case a fortune teller who has visions of a local crime.  She helps get the bad guy convicted, but then...  whoops, what if he is innocent?  We have a slate of possible "real killers" to chose from but  Hollywood convention rules out the obvious psycho, so I started focusing on the least likely perp, and sure enough, darn' tootin', he was the one!  

 

Snatch 3.5 This is Pulp Fiction meets Fight Club, set in the UK featuring characters with accents so thick that even the Brits can't understand them.  

The violence in the film finds a balance between shock and humor similar to the approach in Fargo or Pulp.  But I suspect that many will not see the light side and will instead be repulsed by the gritty nature of the film.  This is not for kids.  

Brad Pitt continues his quest to avoid the pretty boy label and he succeeds as the speech challenged gypsy who can knock 'em out with one punch (but loves his mum more than anything.)  There are some scary characters in this film, especially Mullet (Ewen Bremner), the powerful crime leader who has a unique way of disposing of his victims.  

I enjoyed the surrealistic cinematography in the film, it reminded me of Three Kings, Requiem for a Dream and Traffic.  There is a new style emerging in film, taking advantage of technical advances and heavily influenced by quick cut MTV videos.   

 

State and Main 3 I always look forward to a David Mamet film, I enjoy his dialogue, the interplay between his characters and his intelligent plots.  Here, he takes a light approach as he demonstrates the consequences of a Hollywood movie company "invading" small town America.  State and Main reminded me of one of my favorites of 1999,  Mumford, although I didn't enjoy it as much.  

 

Thirteen Days 3 I will never forget the moment.  I was eight years old, just waking up on a school day.  My Mom sat by the bed and tried her best to explain a global crisis that could result in thermo-nuclear war.  I didn't understand much of what she was saying, but I certainly understood her fear.  She was terrified, and I knew something big was happening.  

Since then I learned all about the blockade and the Turkish missile exchange, but what I liked about Thirteen Days was the introduction of the real battle in the White House, the struggle between President Kennedy and his military leaders.  They wanted war, and it was all he could do to maintain his authority as they tried to conveniently get "rules of engagement" approved that would likely lead to a Cuban invasion.  What I didn't like about "Thirteen Days" was Kevin Costner.  There really should be an act of Congress passed that would prevent Kevin from appearing in any film that requires him to use an accent.  This time, it's the Kennedy New England dialect, and coming from Kevin's mouth it is a constant distraction.  

 

Finding Forrester 2.5 This film just misses, it just didn't hold my interest throughout.   It tells the story of an inner-city African-American high school student who, despite his mediocre grades, is a voracious reader with extraordinary writing skills.  He links up with Sean Connery (Forrester), doing his best Sean Connery imitation.   After the obligatory, "Go away, I am a crotchety old man" scene, Sean takes the boy under his wing and helps him to refine his writing skills.  The plot needs controversy, of course, so a convoluted plagiarism event is introduced.  The climax features the spell binding speech where the bad guy is embarrassed and we are supposed to feel great.  I didn't.  

 

Traffic 4 Who is the enemy in the "war on drugs?".  Users like America's children? Our sons, daughters, coworkers and friends? Drug "kingpins" that import the goods? When the government defeats one, their counterparts are helped by the elimination of the competition.  How can we stop the importation of drugs when we are simultaneous opening our boarders wider?  If we reduce supply, cost goes up, and drug related crime increases to fund purchases.  I don't have the answers, the government doesn't and the point of Traffic is that there isn't a solution.  There are 2 million Americans in state or federal prison.  We lead the world in this category (in both raw number and in % of population).  The number of prisoners has doubled in the last 10 years, and the majority of the increase is due to the "war on drugs".  Do you feel safer?  do you think there are less illicit drugs available?    From my comments, you may feel like Traffic is a documentary.  Far from it, it is a gripping drama with several fascinating story lines woven together.  It is complex, exciting, thought provoking and in my opinion, the best movie of the year 2000. 

 

O Brother, Where Art Thou?  3 The Coen Brothers are at it again, and they succeed with this wacky comedy about a trio of prison escapees looking for their fortune.  George Clooney is excellent as the ring leader and the supporting cast is amusing at every step.  The movie has a mildly amusing approach throughout and he musical numbers were a nice touch, I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed them. 

 

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon 2 I am amazed at the spectacular reviews this film is getting.  It is showing up on Top 10 lists, and getting 4 stars from the best, and I just don't get it.  And it's not that I don't like the genre, I enjoy a good martial arts film, and Jackie Chan sets the standard.  So what went wrong here...  First of all, the "flying" scenes came right out of Peter Pan (the 1950's TV version).  The effects here were laughable.  The Matrix did these scenes perfectly, when a character climbed the wall, each step was perfect.  In CTHD, they wiggle their legs like they can't wait for the wire to lower them down to earth.  I was bored between the martial arts scenes, nothing but talking heads, bla, bla, bla.   What a disappointment. 

 

All the Pretty Horses 3 This is a well made film about righteousness.  Matt Damon is a good guy, a really good guy, and through circumstances not entirely of his own doing finds himself in a Mexican prison in the 40's.  Not a fun place.  He is brave, and honest, and just wants to be a good cowboy. 

 

Dracula 2000 2 I got tricked (bamboozled, waylaid, deceived)!  This is advertised as "Wes Craven's Dracula 2000", so I assumed he directed it.  Or produced it, or had something to do with the movie.  Nope, he just got the cash to put his name above the title.  So I got stuck with a mediocre remake of the bloodsucker guy.  If you have seen the trailer, you saw all the good scenes (both of them). 

 

Cast Away 4 Director Robert Zemeckis and Tom Hanks succeed again with the wonderfully made Cast Away.  From the extreme tension of the perfectly edited plane crash scene to the subtleties of his loneliness on the island the film plays with all of our emotions.    If you haven't seen the trailer or ads for this movie, avoid them, and get to the theatre.  If you have, read on. 

NOTE: This is another one of my "don't read further if you don't want to know the end" sections.  

Why did the marketeers of this film feel it necessary to reveal in the trailer the fact that Hanks makes it off the island after 4 1/2 years?  What possible reason could they have in revealing the ending?  I didn't watch the trailer and tried not to hear it, but it's next to impossible not to, and I heard the fateful line that revealed the ending.   Do they think people would watch the Super Bowl if they knew the final score??? 

 

Proof of Life 3 I know one thing for sure after watching this film, I am very lucky to live right here in these United States.  The thought of living in, or even visiting a third world country and doing without basic protections and freedom is frightening.  Proof of Life is about kidnapping for ransom, a major industry in many lesser developed countries.  Not something I am interested in learning about first hand.  Director Taylor Hackford has made a solid drama, featuring Meg Ryan (wearing that same old t-shirt again) and Russell Crowe (looking very serious and macho in every scene).  The movie got a lot of press because this is how Meg and Russ met, therefore leading to the breakup of her marriage to Dennis Quaid.  My wife thinks that Russ looked better old, gray and overweight in The Insider.  (maybe that's why she likes me).   Anyway, this is an engaging action flick, worthwhile especially if the popcorn is fresh. 

 

Vertical Limit 3 Vertical Limit features breathtaking action scenes that are expertly filmed.  These scenes, especially early in the film, are the reason to see this mountain climbing thriller.  However, the writer and director must have felt that the action sequences  weren't good enough.   To spice things up they introduce six canisters of nitro glycerin, enough to turn Mt. Everest into a parking lot, in an apparent attempt to meet the Hollywood explosion quota.    The alleged purpose of the nitro is to open a hole in the snow covering a crevasse where the remaining members of the climbing party are trapped.   hmmm....  a couple of snow shovels would have been more appropriate.  In any case, despite the over the top third act, Vertical Limit is worth the cost of admission (at least the bargain matinee). 

 

The Legend of Bagger Vance 3 This is nice, gentle film.  It wanders through a time in history when world class athletes could practice for a week after a 10 year layoff and still be world class.  A time when honor was important, even more important than how much money was at stake.  It's a nice story, well told, but not overwhelming in any sense.  

Bagger is played by Will Smith, as the caddy who is really a coach for Rannulph Junuh (Matt Damon).  If Bagger were alive today he would be on Oprah every day.  He is nice... and gentle... and seems to have an amazing effect on Junuh by making subtle suggestions on life and golf.   He changes Junuh's life, then walks into the sunset.  A Christ figure?  Perhaps....  or he may just be a wise and gentle man enjoying life by helping others enjoy theirs. 

 

Requiem for a Dream 3.5 This is Darren Aronofsky's second film, his first effort, Pi, was made for $60,000.  This time he has some real money to work with and he certainly knows how to use it.  His visual approach is fresh and fascinating, camera angles are unusual and he uses fantasy sequences to surprise and amaze us.  The performances are outstanding, led by Ellen Burstyn.  Her portrayal of a retiree facing the downward spiral of drug addiction will lead to an Academy Award nomination, in my opinion.   She is one of four lead characters all headed downward fast as drugs overwhelm their lives.  And therein lies my only criticism of the film.  The story arc is one dimensional, the characters head downhill fast, without hope or redemption.  There are no good guys, and no bad guys either, they have only themselves to blame.  

NOTE: This film is not rated but is clearly for adults, it has some very intense scenes. 

 

Unbreakable 3.5 "I see live people"

That's one way to sum up Unbreakable, the latest by writer/director/producer M. Night Shyamalan, the creator of The Sixth Sense.   Again he pairs with Bruce Willis (who has finally given up on his cheesy hairpieces and adopted a buzz cut of what is left of his hair).  Bruce is alive this time, very alive. 

M. is clearly in control of every aspect of Unbreakable, the pacing is deliberate, the look consistent.  The plot unfolds carefully, building suspense slowly and effectively.  I suspect that many will describe this film as too slow, and they may be disappointed when comparing this effort to the shock ending of Sixth Sense.  But I enjoyed it more, I found it original and thought provoking. 

 

The 6th Day 3 I had heard that this movie was about cloning, but I was wrong.  It is actually about a really, really good Xerox machine that can make perfect copies of human beings (including their memory, scars and wrinkles) in about 10 minutes.   With cloning of course, you would have to wait 40 years to produce a 40 year old human, and then all you would have is an identical twin.  But after you accept this incredible piece of science (and I did), the movie is a fun, futuristic, shoot 'em up full of chase scenes, escapes and lots of people being xeroxed after getting killed by Arnold over and over.  I also got a kick out of their representation of the future, including an XFL quarterback with a  salary of $300 million per year.  

 

Men of Honor 3 Men of Honor tells the story of a man who will stop at nothing to reach his goals.   The film is very well made and has some harrowing action scenes that were perfectly filmed and edited.  

Cuba Gooding Jr. plays Carl Brashear  and the film is based on his life.  He overcomes his limited education, institutional racism and physical challenges to reach the rank of Master Chief in the U.S. Navy.  His determination against high odds is admirable.  However, his quest reminded me of mountain climbers that will train for months, ignoring their family while spending a fortune just to get to the top.  How much could Brashear have accomplished if he channeled his amazing drive to the betterment of his fellow man?   

 

Red Planet 2.5 Red Planet begins painfully, as the writer decided to forgo any attempt at characterization by simply having the narrator give us 5 second personality descriptions of the crew as they enter the space craft.  It get better from there, although the "science" is laughable at times.  And the "surprises" weren't.  When they were gasping for air as their space suit oxygen tanks ran out, didn't they notice the clouds in the sky and the wind whipping the dust right in front of their faces?  This Mars has an atmosphere, take off your helmets guys! (they did, just in the nick of time). 

 

The Yards 2.5 The Yards has a lot going for it, but the ending falls short and prevents me from recommending it.  Performances and character development are excellent, pacing is deliberate but gripping and the first two acts have a lifelike feel.  But the third act drops down a level and is too contrived. 

 

The Legend of Drunken Master 2.5 This Jackie Chan movie is several years old, but just now released in the U.S.  It is dubbed in English, but of course that doesn't really matter, because the highlights of any Jackie Chan film have nothing to do with dialogue.  Drunken Master features some of the best Chan action I have seen, but that's all it has.   His last Hollywood release (Shanghai Noon) had good (not great) action but was a better overall movie.  

 

Best of Show 3.5 I laughed hard and often at this fake documentary about the world of dog shows.  Christopher Guest (writer / director) continues in the Spinal Tap tradition with a wicked satire that is funny throughout.  

 

Pay it Forward 4 An excellent movie.  But if you don't like to know much about a film before you see it, stop reading now. 

*********************

Pay it Forward is a fascinating blend of three story lines.  First, the love story between Arlene and Eugene, with only an alcohol soaked past in common.  The performances here by Kevin Spacey and Helen Hunt are outstanding.   The title provides the second thread as a 7th grader (Haley Joel Osment - the kid with the great vision from The Sixth Sense)  develops the naive idea that he can change the world by encouraging people to repay a kind act by forwarding three more to others.  Sort of a human kindness honor system marketing ponzi scheme.  The clever construction of the third element is what makes it interesting.   A reporter investigates the pay it forward scheme backwards after being a recipient (new Jaguar) while the rest of the movie moves forward to catch up with his trek that started 4 months earlier.  Sound confusing?  It wasn't.  It worked. 

(MOVIE ENDING REVEALED BELOW) 

Prior to seeing the film, I had inadvertently seen a reference to the "twist" at the end of this film that was incorrectly compared to the major shock at the end of The Sixth Sense.  The end to Pay it Forward is not a plot twist, it doesn't change what went before as in The Usual Suspects.  And although many may find it shocking and unnecessary I feel it is the key to the whole film.   Without the martyr element, the pay it forward movement never would get the boost that it needs to have a real impact.   The ultimate irony.  And the subtle approach to the delivery of that message was perfect.  

 

Dr. T and the  Women 2.5 Robert Altman directs and as a big fan, that's what drew me to the movie.  His trademark free form dialogue is present in many scenes, and the performances are good, but that doesn't offset the lack of a compelling story.  And I am sure he meant something by the  presence of water in almost every scene (rain, fountains, sprinklers, etc.) but it went way over my head. 

 

The Contender 4 This is a compelling, thoughtful political thriller.  If you have seen the preview, you have seen the first 3/4 of the movie, so if you haven't, don't.  

The Contender succeeds on many fronts, starting with the fascinating characters, especially Senator Runyan, expertly played by Gary Oldman.   I  predict an Oscar nomination for Oldman.  

My favorite TV show is The West Wing, an intriguing and well made drama about the inner workings of the White House.  The Contender offers what the small screen can't, the difference of an R rated drama.  The  gritty realism of the movie kept me interested throughout and makes this one of the best movies of the year. 

 

Get Carter 1.5 Oh well, the end of the winning streak, but it's my own fault.  I broke rule number one again (don't see a movie that isn't released for critical review prior to opening day).  

Sylvester  isn't the problem in this movie, the convoluted plot is  more sinister than Stallone's character.  It takes forever to get nowhere.

NOTE: There was a refreshing scene, one that I have waited a long time to see.  Many action movies have car chases where the bad guy pulls along side the good guy and either 1) turns into the good guy's car or 2) points his gun at the good guy or 3) talks to the good guy through the window (even though they are traveling at 80 mph.)  At this point I generally yell directly at the screen (to the good guy) and say: "hit the brakes!", that would of course put him in a much safer position, behind the bad guy.  But they never do, they seem to prefer staying even him.  Amazingly, in Get Carter, Stallone executes the braking maneuver, before I even suggested it! 

  

Meet the Parents 3.5 2000 is finally starting to deliver some quality movies.  After a weak summer season, Meet the Parents follows Almost Famous, Nurse Betty and Remember the Titans as highly recommended films.  Even the popcorn is tasting better.  

Ben Stiller is perfect as the prospective son-in-law meeting the protective father and finds that everything he says and does is wrong, or misunderstood, or both.  Robert DeNiro continues his hot streak as a comic actor.  

I suspect this film will be compared to Something About Mary, but I found it funnier, and it is certainly less crude.  

The comedy works because it fits the characters and isn't inserted just for the laugh.  Everyone has good intentions: there are no village idiots, bratty kids or pompous reporters that are so easy to wrap humor around.   And although the plot is certainly stretched to facilitate the jokes, it all fits together well and comes complete with a feel good ending.      

 

Remember The Titans 3.5 This is based on the true story of a Virginia High School that is forced to integrate it's student body and it's football team in 1971.  It is decided that a black football coach will be in charge,  leaving the local hero coach as the assistant.  

Early in the film, I kept thinking that things were going too well, people don't overcome life long prejudices this quickly.  The team comes together, interracial friendships are made, the coaches battle (but stay united), people act wonderfully in a difficult situation.  A fantasy perhaps, that will likely bring criticism.  However, I see this film not as the retelling of a true story but rather as a beacon of hope.   It has a tremendous optimism that will make you feel good, if you let it. 

 

Nurse Betty 4 This is the perfect movie to walk into cold, so I won't reference the plot here.  The performance of Renee Zellweger (Nurse Betty) steals the show, she is a joy to watch.   If you like character driven, offbeat films.... give this one a chance. 

 

The Exorcist 4 I almost didn't bother to see this again, I remembered all the "good parts" very well.  I am glad I did, because I had forgotten how really good this movie is.  The famous shots that everyone remembers are still just as scary but I more impressed by the careful crafting of the ancillary scenes.  

 

Bait 3 The preview of this movie gives the impression that this is a silly comedy in the Martin Lawrence / David Spade mode.  Based on that impression, I had no interest in attending.  But I had a popcorn craving and Roger said this was a good one, so off I went.  The preview forgot to mention that there is a credible set-up, gritty action and a great performance by Jamie Foxx.  This movie is a lot of fun. 

 

The Watcher 2 The streak of good movies ended at one.  Back to the dismal summer of 2000.  There are many things wrong with this movie, starting with a poor casting job; Marisa Tomei as a psychiatrist?  James Spader is supposed to be a stressed out FBI agent with serious mental health problems, but he looks way too good for that character.  Guess who plays the police captain??  Yup, for the 12,000th time in a Hollywood thriller, the captain is played by a black guy.  And the serial killer? Keanu Reeves (Huh?)   He would not be believable as the killer of a box of Wheaties  (cereal killer, but you knew that.)

 

Almost Famous 4 It was nice to see a good movie again. 

 This is Cameron Crowe's first since Jerry McGuire, and it has a very pleasant feel to it.  It is easy to like, especially for someone like me who went to High School in the late '60's, always wishing I could be a rock star.    

It features great performances by Kate Hudson, Patrick Fugit and Frances McDormand.   It mixes drama and comedy very well and moves along at a nice pace, I found it very engaging.  

NOTE: I had a serious deja vu watching this movie.  A high school kid tries to sneak a rock album into the house, and Mom finds it, declares it subversive, and bans it from the house.  I lived this scene.  My well intended Dad took my copy of Chicago Transit Authority (first album, before they became "Chicago"), read the liner notes and declared it subversive, never to be played in his house.  (Of course, I played it anyway, just at really low volume.)

 

The Tao of Steve 2 Not only is this summer's movie season really bad, but now I have to sit through essentially the same movie two days in a row.   Here is the plot:  Scuzzbag lead character "Dex" exists only to deceive women in an attempt to have sex.  

The Tao is Dex's philosophy on how to pick up women, only slightly more sophisticated than the approach of the lowlifes in Whipped.  The Steve represents "cool guys" like Steve McGarett (Hawaii Five-O), Steve Austin (The Million Dollar Man) and the ultimate Steve.... McQueen.   But of course Dex doesn't follow his own teachings when he finds someone he really likes, and for some unknown reason, she likes him too.  He is a total loser, she's not, but leave it to Hollywood to have them together at the end.   

They say that everyone in LA is writing a screenplay, it's hard to believe that so many of them are so bad.   hmmm..... "Once upon a time....

 

Whipped 1.5 It is rare when a movie comes along that is absolutely consistent, where the acting, direction and script are in perfect sync.  Whipped is that unusual film that not only has a despicable screenplay and wretched performances but also manages to be totally predictable.  A total waste of the talent of Amanda Peet. 

The summer of 2000 is turning out to be a sad one for movies, hard to believe that my choices on a holiday weekend were this mess and another sequel to the Highlander series.  When does Survivor II start??? 

 

The Art of War 2 Another movie not released for review by critics prior to opening, so you know what that means (see The In Crowd, below).  And once again my better judgment was overcome by the thought of a large buttered popcorn.  

This film actually had potential, several of the scenes are well done, but it shoots itself in the foot over and over with ridiculous plot developments.  And although there are no other indications of super powers or sci-fi in the movie, for some reason the characters all have the ability to leap from high places (40+ feet), land on concrete, and run away without the expected shattered ankles.  Maybe it's the camera angle... or just bad direction. 

  

The Cell 3.5 The last time I highly recommended a movie based on its incredible visual impact (What Dreams May Come) I was almost voted out of the reviewers union.   So with that warning, here I go again.  The Cell is an amazing visual feast, so grab some popcorn, sit in front and let the wonders of year 2000 special effects wash over you.  

The plot is your standard serial killer, young girl in peril thriller, but as Roger always says: "It's not what it is about, but how it is about it".  The how is terrific, so head for the cineplex. 

 

The Replacements 2.5 I shouldn't have liked this movie as much as I did.  It really isn't very good.  If you saw the preview, you saw the movie, except for the ending.  But of course it's a sports movie, so you know how it ends (big play, our hero, etc.).  There are some embarrassingly bad moments in this film, but it also has a sort of sweet charm to it, and a few scenes that really worked (you have to like the "I Will Survive" rendition in the jail lockup).  

NOTE: I can't stand Summerall and Madden doing an NFL game, they were even worse playing themselves in this movie.  Summerall looks like a wax museum statue of himself, Madden is his usually blubbering self. 

 

Hollow Man 3 Hollow Man starts as a sci-fi movie featuring amazing (and transparent) special effects that overshadow the weak characterizations.  Then it transitions into a horror movie in the Alien tradition.   The special effects clearly lead the way in the third act as the bad guy tries to pick off our heroes one by one.   The final battles include  surprisingly intelligent moves by the hunted as they try to bring the Hollow Man into view.   

Note: I continue to be amazed at the evolution of computer generated special effects.  They seem to get geometrically better each year.  Both movies I saw this weekend (Hollow Man and Space Cowboys) had wonderful effects that simply can't be detected as such.  I can't begin to imagine the state of computer imagery five years from now.  I can't wait. 

 

Space Cowboys 3 There are many films where the plot is so hokey that no matter how good the rest of the film is I just can't buy it.  Mission Impossible II comes to mind.  Space Cowboys has a ridiculous set-up too, but the boys are so much fun and the movie has such an upbeat first half that I was able to overlook the unlikely story contrivances.   The four semi-legends (Eastwood, Jones, Sutherland and Garner) seemed to have a great time making this film, and that made it fun to watch.  

 

What Lies Beneath 2 You can't accuse the director of What Lies Beneath of using the standard horror movie cliché of having the cat jump out from behind the door to scare the audience.  He was much more creative than that, he had the pet dog do it.  The first act of this film is filled with drawn out scenes punctuated by a standard "gotcha", that makes one jump (they worked on me).   I reacted to the editing expertise, but I was never scared.  In fact the audience laughed at most of these.  And although this is a very well acted film, the story is very predictable and therefore this is a movie  I can't recommend.  There are so many obvious clues, it was easy to see where the story was going.    

 

The In Crowd 2.5 There was nothing else I wanted to see and I needed a popcorn fix, so I violated one of the rules and went to a movie that had not been released to critics ahead of its opening.  This is normally a kiss of death, as studios only take this drastic step if they know they have a total loser, and they don't want the bad pub.   But the popcorn was victorious.  Surprisingly, my low expectations were exceeded.  After a slow start this teen thriller about bitchiness and revenge actually had some entertaining moments.  But don't bother going to the big screen, you will see one copy of it soon at Blockbuster. 

 

X Men 3 X Men has a very promising opening, I liked the way the concept was established.  I understood the "rules" and was ready to play.  Although the look of this film is no where near as compelling as that of The Matrix, it does establish a sci-fi world that makes sense in its own way.  Based on a cartoon series, X Men has to bridge the gap to film.  I liked the way it handled the silliness of cartoon names and practices by having one of the leads laugh at them for us.  The effects are great at times but the quality drops below what we have come to expect most of the time.  The whole production has sort of an "A-" quality to it, not quite top-notch.  And after the strong open, the film degrades, the ending was weak and was incredibly obvious about setting up the sequel.

 

Jesus' Son 2 This is a limited release "art" film that I wanted to see because Roger gave it a good rating and because it features some great character actors (Holly Hunter, Dennis Hopper and Jack Black).  I was disappointed.  It tells the story of a meek, weak drug addict, his girlfriend and their "adventures".   Other than one very funny scene involving a knife accident, the movie falls flat.  Although very well acted, I just didn't care for these characters.  Their travels are not interesting, they are boring, and redemption is not in the cards.   And I never did get the title....  There is never any indication that they intend for the title to be taken literally, and if not, then why go with it?  

 

Scary Movie 3 You should only consider seeing this movie if:  

1) You have seen Scream 1, 2 & 3, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Halloween and The Matrix.

2) You are age 18 or over. 

3) You are not offended by fart jokes, penis jokes,  breast implant jokes and drug use humor.

For those of us left, Scary Movie, is at times a very funny movie.  It is also crude, sophomoric and has as many jokes that fail as ones that make it.  

 

The Patriot 3 On one level this is a film about one mans involvement in the Revolutionary War.   It is also a revenge movie; a series of brutal and escalating exchanges proving only that revenge is never sweet and never enough.  An alarming centerpiece of The Patriot is a horrific slaughter of civilians in a church that defies explanation.  This ultimate act takes the film to another level, that of exposing man's inhumanity towards his fellow man.  It is a scene that doesn't fit well with the rest of the film, it pulls it into a hell rarely seen on screen.  Were massacres like this typical during the Revolutionary War?  or is this just an attempt to make the movie bad guy as evil as possible? In any case, it is a very disturbing scene that drags the film down.  

 

The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle 3 What a strange combination: 1) A cartoon remake, 2) starring Robert De Niro, 3) rated PG-13.

If you didn't like the original cartoon series, don't bother, you won't like this movie (and won't "get it" either).  If you are a fan of R&B, I suspect you will be mildly amused as I was.  The remake stays true to the original; full of corny puns, the throw-away plot, Rocky's endless optimism and Bullwinkles "lower than a moose" IQ.  

The occasional reference to classic movies* makes for some fun moments, and overall this is a pleasant summer diversion.  

*watch for De Niro giving a fresh read to lines from Taxi Driver.  

 

The Perfect Storm 4 Finally a really good movie in the Year 2000!  

This is a summer action movie that goes beyond the usual effects and chase scenes.  Based on a true story, this drama about a fishing boat and a fierce storm will keep you interested from start to finish.  On-screen peril isn't gripping unless you care about the characters, and they are well established in the opening scenes.  The introductions are followed by some fascinating scenes that show exactly how deep sea commercial fisherman make their living.  These are a great set up to the storm that follows.  Forget about MI:2, this is the movie to see! 

 

WARNING: SIGNIFICANT PLOT POINTS REVEALED BELOW

As good as The Perfect Storm is, it's not perfect.  The special effects are excellent, but there are times when the fishing boat is put through hoops that are just too over the top (literally).  And the waves are way too big to be believed.  Finally, as much as I liked this movie, I don't think it will be a big hit because of the ending.  Films succeed based on word of mouth, and too many folks are not going to be happy with the end of this movie.    

 

Me, Myself and Irene 2.5 The Farrelly Brothers (Something About Mary) are at it again, with Jim Carrey in two of the title roles.  He plays Charlie and Hank, split personalities from opposite ends of the spectrum.  There are several funny scenes, usually when the "bad" Carrey character is on screen, but the one that had me rolling involved the "good" Jim and a cow.  Some of the gross out humor isn't gross or humor, and that keeps M, M & I from being recommended. However, I have to admit that the scenes with Charlies' sons are a guilty pleasure.   I have always liked Carrey's physical comedy, he can't be blamed for this not being a great movie.  So, don't expect Something About Mary, but if you are a diehard Carrey fan, you might like this film. 

 

Titan A. E.  2 This is a well made animated science fiction film.  It features a nice mix of traditional and computer generated animation.   The story is fine, but I was bored, and I would have liked this much better if it was live action instead of animation.  

 

Shaft 1.5 The good news about this film is the title song.  They left it alone.  Unfortunately, that was the only good choice in the making of the movie. 

The director of a cop drama should  pick a style and stick with it.  When I think of great ones like 48 Hours, Lethal Weapon or Heat, they all have that quality.  A consistent approach and a level of realism that remains throughout.  At times Shaft tries the gritty, realistic approach, at other times it plays like a comic book.  

The second problem with the film centers around the ethics of the lead characters.  When they encounter  "dirty" cops, what do they do?  Shoot them.  Without hesitation.  A cold blooded revenge killing plays out before their eyes, what do they do? Chuckle their way into the next scene.  Disturbing.     

 

Gone in 60 Seconds 1.5 Random questions from a movie fan:

1) How can a movie about car theft not have any good car chases in it?

2) How can a movie "starring" Angelina Jolie not put her on screen for more than 10 minutes and not give her more than one good line (the one in the preview, of course).

This is not a good film.  Nicholas Cage borrows his ConAir character (bad boy gone straight, "just tryin' to help"), and Jolie is severely underutilized.   This film is filled with bad clichés, predictable plot moves and doesn't bother to have any clever or interesting characters.  

 

Dinosaur 3 The special effects here are outstanding.  It's interesting to compare Dinosaur to Jurassic Park, the latter featured about 18 screen minutes of computer animation, while the new one is constant dinos.  Plus, the graphics artists have finally conquered the "hair" effect; the fur on the monkeys is perfect.   The story is typical Disney, good for the kids, nice for adults, with all the right redeeming qualities.   I loved the opening and the meteor shower is amazing.  

Roger commented that this film went downhill when the dinosaurs started talking.  He felt that the visuals were so good that the human-like creatures were out of place.  It didn't bother me, this is a Disney movie, and I expected the banter.   At least the T-Rex's didn't break into song wearing pink Tutus.  

 

Small Time Crooks 3 Woody Allen again just plays himself, but this light and funny story is enough to overcome his overexposure.  There are some very funny moments in this film, so if you like Woody, you will like this movie. 

 

Shanghai Noon 3 Jackie Chan is up to his usual antics;  amazingly choreographed fight scenes.  But the movie is stolen by his new age, can't shoot straight sidekick, played by Owen Wilson.  The combination makes for a very funny (although sometimes silly) western.  When the lines are too long for MI:2, check out out Shanghai Noon instead.  

 

Mission Impossible 2 2 The first time that a character in MI:2 peels off his mask revealing his true identity, I was surprised, it was an effective plot move.   The second time this trick from the old TV show was used it still made sense.  The third and fourth times were completely ridiculous.  After a strong open, MI:2 becomes laughable.  The mask peel offs are predictable, the action scenes become increasingly absurd, and John Woo's direction is stale.   Example: Our hero and the bad guy are chasing each other on motorcycles.  They square off and ride toward each other at top speed.  Will they crash? ... will they veer off at the last minute? ...  Of course not.  They simply leap off their bikes (at 60mph each), collide in mid air, and roll to the ground to continue their battle.  I couldn't stop laughing.  

 

Time Code 3 Time Code takes a very interesting approach.  The film is split into 4 segments, all shown simultaneously, each occupying 1/4 of the screen.  Each segment was shot in real time and the action in each is occurring at the same time in the story.  It may sound like a lot to keep track of, but the writer/director (Mike Figgis, "Leaving Las Vegas") keeps some of the segments low key as he alternates dialogue between the different scenes.  The effect is fascinating when characters move from one panel into the next, first followed by one camera, then two, as they are "handed off" into the next scene.   I liked this movie because of the approach, the story itself is thin.  At the end of the film we are informed that the actors improvised all of their dialogue, based on a predetermined structure and that each scene was shot in one take.  This made me appreciate their performances more, but doesn't make the story any better.  If you are a film buff, this is a good movie to check out.  

 

The Big Kahuna 1.5 My wife says this should have been titled My Dinner With Larry.  Although neither of us have seen My Dinner With Andre, just the thought of an entire movie about a conversation between two people is boring.  The Big Kahuna adds a third character, but it's not enough to keep you awake.   I love going in to movies without knowing much about them but this film is the downside of that approach.   Don't bother watching this one, rent American Beauty instead. 

 

The Virgin Suicides 2.5 Francis Coppola's daughter Sofia wrote and directed this movie, and she proves to be much more capable in this capacity than she did as an actor in Godfather III.   I enjoyed the acting, especially James Woods (perfect as the father) and this tale of teens growing up in the 70's brought back some memories.  However, the story wasn't strong enough to recommend this film.  The relationship between the boys and the sisters just wasn't deep enough and there isn't a hint of what pushed the girls to be represented in the title of the movie.  

 

U-571 3 I loved submarine movies as a kid (e.g. Run Silent, Run Deep and Torpedo Run) .  I remember classic scenes like: 1) The "depth charge attack", where the underwater bombs get closer and closer, the sub shakes and rocks, the sailors fall to the floor and the pipes start to leak.  2) The "take it deeper" scene, where the captain orders the sub to go deeper than it is designed to go (to avoid the "depth charge attack");  the  sub creaks and moans, the pipes burst and the depth gauge goes beyond the Guinness record for deepest dive.... and 3) the "fake out the enemy scene" by stuffing junk in the torpedo tube (and bodies) and sending it all to the surface so that the bad guys think that the "depth charge attack" was successful.  I could watch these movies over and over.  And actually, I just did.  U-571 uses all of these famous scenes, adds a new twist and features the most explosive torpedo ever built.  But I didn't mind the repetition, it was fun, exciting and well made.  

 

Gladiator 2.5 The first summer movie of 2000 is a disappointment.  If nothing else, a gladiator film must have great fight scenes and this one doesn't.  It was difficult to follow the action, hard to tell who was who, and there are far too many close ups.  The opening battle scene is terrific until the point where the hand to hand combat begins, then it fades fast.  

The plot line is very predictable early on, but then switches gears and becomes more interesting.  However, it takes too long to tell the story, the second half drags on far too long.  This should have been a two hour movie.  

 

Frequency 3.5 Science Fiction, by definition, requires the audience to accept an alternate reality.  The time travel/time warp genre has been done many times before and it always introduces logic conflicts and plot difficulties.  Frequency handles these by establishing the rules of the game  early on and sticking with them.   Once you have accepted the new reality, you are free to enjoy the drama of the story.  (The Matrix, on the other hand, had no rules and therefore I couldn't accept the plot line) 

Frequency is really three films in one: 1) science fiction time warp 2) murder mystery thriller and 3) father / son tear jerker.  All three deliver.  

 

Gossip 3 This is a stylish thriller featuring an apartment than any GenXer would trade  all of their MP3's just to live in for a week.  It's a story about college students (who all appear to be about 30) with way too much time on their hands.  They like to gossip, just for fun.  They decide to tell a tale to see how far it will travel, but the game gets serious in a hurry.  Like most thrillers, some of the plot turns are a bit far fetched, but overall it works.  

 

American Psycho 2.5 American Psycho is a film that takes a lot of chances.  Most people won't like the results.   I found it intriguing, but ultimately not compelling enough to recommend.   This is a movie about superficiality in the 80's and how a sociopath is able to (amazingly) fit right in.  It features a group of yuppies who are far more concerned with having reservations at trendy restaurants than having real conversations.  The performance by Chistian Bale is very good, but so over the top at times that the satire became almost silly.   Most movie goers will hate this film, so if you are intrigued by offbeat fare, see American Psycho quickly before it disappears.

 

28 Days 2 This plays like a TV movie with  Sandra Bullock miscast as the alcoholic drug abuser.   Where is Angelina Jolie when you need her?  Sandy transforms quickly from the happy drunk to a couple of days of the shakes, then immediately into a bright, insightful, caring person as quickly as you can turn a page in this thin script.   

 

Return to Me 3.5 This was not on my list to see, but I needed a popcorn fix, and Roger said it was good.  I was very pleasantly surprised.  If you like romantic comedies you will love this movie.  If you are like me, and prefer other genres, you will still like it.   The characters are fun, there are quite a few laughs and the script avoids the usual clichés.  If you are looking for pleasant, appealing fare, check this one out.    As an added bonus, it takes place in Chicago.

 

Rules of Engagement 2 Rules of Engagement is a military courtroom drama and like all courtroom drama's, you know who is going to win before the "All Rise" on the first day.  Samuel L. Jackson is on trial for what is presented as a despicable murder of civilians.  What is supposed to happen is that as the "evidence" unfolds we find out that it wasn't despicable at all, rather the slaughter of women and children was aok.  The case isn't made and the problem with the movie is that he should have been found guilty.   

 

Black and White 3 This is an interesting film that features strong performances by two unlikely candidates: Brooke Shields and Mike Tyson.  Mike plays himself, reportedly improvised most of his scenes, and manages to finish the film without any ear chewing (lucky for Brooke).    Although I enjoyed many of the scenes, the third act plot changes were confusing. 

 

High Fidelity 3.5 John Cusack's character spends a good part of this movie talking to the camera, as an in scene narrator.  But those aren't the good parts.  Jack Black steals the show as Barry, the very sarcastic and very knowledgeable record store clerk.  He knows everything there is to know about every rock/pop/soul album ever released and if you don't, he won't even sell you a copy.  You have to wonder how they stay in business.    High Fidelity continues Cusack's string of off beat movies, and it has quite a few very funny moments.   Surprisingly, the score is disappointing, but Black makes up for it.  I predict a best supporting actor nomination going in his direction.

 

Sweet and Lowdown 2.5 Sean Penn is good in the lead role, although I am not sure his performance is truly worthy of an Oscar nomination.  After all, he tends to slip into a weak "Tommy Flanagan" impersonation too often.  Tommy, of course, was the "lying guy" played by Jon Lovitz on SNL, and Penn adopts a nasal, whiny approach to his character that was distracting at times. 

 

Erin Brockivitch 3 Adapted true stories are becoming more popular these days (The Hurricane, The Insider, Boys Don't Cry), and in each case they receive criticism for not being more accurate.   Conversely, Roger didn't like this movie because they accurately portrayed the wardrobe (or lack of it) worn by Ms. Brockivitch.   He said it was distracting.  Distraction is not always a bad thing.  

Julia Roberts is very good in this role.  The plot moves along nicely, their are several funny moments and even though the trailer gave away most of the movie, it's still a good one.

 

Final Destination 3.5 One of the joys of movies for me is when I see a movie cold (knowing nothing about the film) and it turns out to be a winner.   The only thing I knew about Final Destination was what I learned from the picture in the movie ad, and that picture had nothing to do with the film!  Rather than give away the fun, I will only say that this is not high art, but it is a new twist on an old formula that works.  This is a great popcorn movie.

 

Mission to Mars 3 After hearing very mixed and mostly negative reviews, I decided to see this film only after being asked by my sister to join her and her two little ones (ages 6 and 5).  The movie was pretty good but the ongoing whispered commentary of my nephew made it even more fun.  He sure does have lots of questions!   Back to the movie... The opening scene was terrible, but once they get into space things pick up.  Special effects, as I have said many times, are becoming routine, but most of the visuals in Mission to Mars were quite good.  There are some exciting and tense "danger" scenes followed by an ending inspired by Contact that worked for me.  

 

The Ninth Gate 2 One of the dangers of my relentless efforts to NOT know much about a movie prior to viewing is that sometimes I go in with totally invalid assumptions.  For some reason I thought The Ninth Gate was a science fiction thriller, but was surprised to learn that it is a gothic duller.  This is a boring movie and Johnny Depp really looks silly trying to look old.   

 

Pitch Black 2 This is a very standard sci-fi horror movie (Alien "light") complete with the entire array of horror clichés.  Vin Diesel (what a great action movie star name!) is the only bright spot, I expect that his career will continue upwards.

 

The Beach 2 Most of this film takes places near Thailand on a beautiful island with an incredible lagoon and beach.   The opening provides potential for a good adventure, but doesn't deliver on the promise.  The characters escape to a paradise island but they are also escaping all responsibility, even to their friends and neighbors.  The fatal flaw of the film is that no one steps up to take the heroic role, they all fade, they all fail.  

 

The Wonder Boys 3 Quirky is the definitive word here.  This is a quirky story with quirky characters doing quirky things.  It has a World According to Garp feel to it, just not as far out there.  I found it amusing and interesting, but a little light.  More substance needed to make it a top notch film.

 

Boys Don't Cry 3 A very intelligent film about a group of people who are not.  Based on a true story, this is a collection of misfits right off the set of Jerry Springer, with the exception of the lead character.   The Best Actress nomination for Hilary Swank is very well deserved, she does an incredible job with her role.

 

The Whole Nine Yards 3 Another mobster comedy along the lines of Analyze This, but this time it's a Hungarian gang.  Other than that bit of political correctness, it's fairly standard comedic fair.  Funny bits throughout and a very good performance by Amanda Peet.

 

Boiler Room 2 First time writer/director Ben Younger presents some very powerful scenes early in the film, but ultimately the poorly structured plot drags the movie down.   The third act is terrible.

Two scenes showed promise; the Ben Affleck recruitment speech is wonderful, and when the hotshots mimic the movie Wall Street, it's clear where their heads are at  (Greed is good!).  Maybe Younger's next film will feature more scenes like these  and fewer plot distractions.

 

Holy Smoke 1.5 Jane Campion, the director of Holy Smoke, is the first winner of the coveted MovieWatch Magnolia award.   This prestigious award is bestowed on the director that drops from the top faster than OJ and shows less regard for the audience than Bill did for Hillary.  After the award winning The Piano, Campion apparently feels that she can film random events and dialogue and have people care.  I didn't.  

 

Scream 3 2.5 This movie is a guilty pleasure.  It's almost as good as the first one, but once you know the pattern, it is not as much fun.   But the familiar "inside" movie jokes are still around, so this is not a bad stop if you really need a popcorn fix. 

 

Eye of the Beholder 1.5 Thriller's are one of my favorite genres, and that it why I ignored the bad reviews to see this movie.  I should have known better.   This film makes no sense, is poorly cast, and boring.  The popcorn wasn't even fresh. 

 

Snow Falling on Cedars 3 Aspiring cinematographers should study this film frame by frame as a model of how important the look of a film can be.  Every scene is a beautiful portrait in motion, and this alone makes Cedars worth the price of admission. 

 

Girl, Interrupted 2.5 Angelina Jolie does a wonderful job as the rebel leader in a mental health facility.  She is always good and I would think that her performance here would rate an Oscar nomination.   However one strong performance can't support a movie alone.  The story is just not good enough to make this a recommended film.

 

 

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