Monday 11 August 2003

I'm not sure if it was the dip in the creek or what, but after taking Catherine home last September I caught a really bad cold... one of the worst I'd had in a very long time. It was bad enough that the menthol cigarettes I'd smoked at the time tasted horrible and I wound up switching to regulars.

Meanwhile, at home, something was terribly wrong. To this day I have no clue what happened... it was like a light switch had turned off. Kari was a completely different woman. On Monday that week I wore a suit jacket to school, something I rarely do. Over the course of the day, 30-40 people told me how good I looked. Kari wasn't one of them. She didn't speak with me all night. I told her her silence was killing me.

Tuesday night she dropped the bomb... she wanted to "take a step back from our relationship," saying she felt "suffocated" and "trapped" by me. She did not want nor need hugs, cuddles, or kisses... just companionship and support... friendship. I told her the only reason I'd moved in with her was to build a relationship... for Christ's sake we were going to have a baby together! She accused me of laying a guilt trip on her and wanted to be left alone.

Wednesday night we had our first argument. I wanted to know why she'd had such a drastic change of heart, she refused to tell me. The more I asked the angrier she became. I wanted merely to have an adult conversation with her... I'd gone through this with Yvonne (and to a smaller degree two others), and figured reason would win out. She would have none of it though... using reason meant having to talk, something she absolutely refused to do.

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