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Hat Manners - Do's and Don'ts
by Miss Mary
Hats have been here forever and probably last as long as we do. This article is about women's hats, so I won't write about when men tip their hats or take them off, but I sure hope they shed them when the National Anthem is playing. Do we? No. Unless we're wearing a ballcap or skullcap. We do not remove a hat that is hatpinned, ladies.

Is this a double standard? No. Ladies Hats and men's hats are very different. Many women's hats have flowers and ribbons, ties, net - it's quite an act to remove them, especially if they're anchored with hatpins. Women do not risk messing up their hairdos to remove their hats. ((However, all unisex caps are removed during the National Anthem. ))

Even though hats rather went out in most places in the sixties, in some places they are still fashionable. Here in Florida, the straw garden hat remains a must. Garden hats are generally straw and brimmed. Showy garden hats are worn to garden parties. If you ask me what a Garden Party is, then I know for sure you're not a Southerner...or you're under 35...

The Beach Hat is something every woman should have. Most of the models are a little flirtatious, but respectful. I've forgotten and worn my into the water. Since then, I use inexpensive beach hats. The Red Hat Society ladies wear their hats during the day when they are meeting or having lunch. A lady, however, never wears brimmed hats after 5 PM, a fashion rule that developed because women do not need a brim after sunset 'to block out sunshine.'

Straws and cottons can look charmingly vintage or up-to-the-minute fresh. They’re literally cool and stylishly hot. They can be as dressed-down casual as they can be fancifully elegant. Florida’s sun may be brutal, but it gives us local ladies a grand opportunity to cover up with hats. Try a variety of straw hats on for size. A lady has at least 3 summer hats in her closet - yes, in hatboxes. Target is where JudyLee found hatboxes recently.

It is acceptable for Christian women to wear hats in church, but disrespectful for men to wear them. Not so with Conservative or Orthodox Jews, who would find it disrespectful for men not to cover their heads with a yarmulke when in a synagogue. Men are required to cover their heads in Jewish synagogues, but only married women wear hats or scarves representing a display of her increased modesty towards those other than the woman's husband.

In places of worship head coverings are required for both men and women in Muslim mosques, and Sikh temples.

My mom said once "It always surprises me when I see someone wearing a baseball cap in a restaurant. It's just tacky." This goes for men and women.

Few women wear hats to church anymore. We are Lutherans and my Mom and I were the only two women in church to wear hats in the late 90's. Emily Post: Post is quoted as saying in "It is impossible for a hatless woman to be chic." ((This was 1959 or 1960 though!!)) She added that it is incorrect to wear a hat with an evening dress, however. My Mom held this true until she died.

Hats can be worn to theaters or concerts, but people should remove them if they are blocking anyone's view.

Hat-wearers must be careful when putting something on the hatband, by the way. Anything put on the band of a man's hat must be on the left side, and anything on a woman's hatband must be on the right. This has changed some since 2000 - woman are putting things on either side.

Amy Vanderbilt gave women the choice about whether to wear hats to outdoor parties and weddings in her 1963 "New Complete Book of Etiquette." Women should keep their hats on in homes holding christenings, weddings and funerals, because in those occasions the house is treated as if it were a house of worship, she said.

Women should not remove hats that go with dinner suits or dinner dresses throughout the evening. Miss Manners notes that daytime hats must be doffed at dusk. I have seen many women wear evening hats as early as 4 pm. Again from my mom, "Evening hats are never brimmed hats. They are fussy, netty, cute little numbers."

A lady 'nods' her hat to say to anyone, male or female – thank you, excuse me, hello, goodbye, you’re welcome or how do you do. She does not remove her hat when she does this.

Be careful about wearing someone else's hat. Spray with Lysol or some other hygienic spray. This is a matter of good personal hygiene. Spray your own hats to freshen them up - don't over do it though.

Did you know that you can spray paint hats? You can - spray the inside of the hat first - be sure it's dry before you paint the outside. Remove all ribbon and decorations before painting. You can decorate when the hat's dry. Straw hats for spray painting...don't spraypaint felt. You can, but it doesn't look very nice.

Hat Pins remain an evil protection measure, ladies. OHHHHHHHHHHHh... don't forget, if you're wearing gloves, remove them before eating...I know this doesn't pertain to hats, but then it does. Women who wear hats to lunch often wear gloves.


[[Your shoes should match your hats!]]

Finally, removed hats are held in hand in such a way that only the outside and never the lining is visible. Neither is the namebrand visible. It is considered showing off and bad breeding to show off a namebrand on your hat. (Tacky, tacky, tacky...). Hold your hat casually with one hand. Always handle your hat by the brim. Do not pinch the crown to pick it up as this will result in misshapen crowns and may split the felt or straw. Hold hat gently.

By the mid 1800s, millinery had established itself as being on the same level as haute couture. The first important name in millinery was Caroline Reboux. Hats were designed specifically for the individual and were used to emphasize and even exaggerate their personal characteristics.

During the late Edwardian period hats became very much a status symbol encouraging many more society women to develop their skills as milliners. Hats continued to be popular until the 1960s, when they underwent a steady decline. I've noticed Palm Beach ladies have kept their hats thoughout the years.

Millinery today has benefited from somewhat of a revival and the return of hat wearing is gradually becoming more common. Red Hat Society chapters around the world are giving perks to the Millinery industry. There are over 13,000 Red Hat Society members. Each chapter has between 15 and 100 members. Go figure...that's a lot of red and pink, and lavender and purple hats! We predict a hat come-back in the 2000's.

the end - MissMary, Feb. 2, 2004

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