What is the truth about the SUPERLATIVE Black Male? The very question seems imbued with sexual overtones. As a white (caucassian) I realize the many accomplishment that our European ancestors deserve credit for, both since the Roman conquest of our forefathers (barbarians), and since the rise of capitalism, the Enlightenment, the age of exploration, etc. (Whites have perfected such advances as materialism, rationalism or atheism, and much more.) But I wish to examine a delicate (taboo) subject -- sex.
The psycho-existential truism that (thanks to America's sordid racist past) the only, or at any rate, the most exquisitely heterosexual relationhip anywhere, is the relationship between Black Males and White Females. That truism is probably more valid that not, at least at a deep, psycho-sexual level. It is no longer just the secret of the underground radical freudians. The whole world seems to be alive to the reality of it.
Why do white chicks on campuses and military posts across the nation, in music venues, and just about anywhere that races congregate ..... seem drawn to some indefinable quality or MO-JO, real or imagined, in the African American Male? Is it the images, the pictures, the media portrayal?
First off, a disclaimer. While I have heard the statistics, cited by so many sources, proving that the Black Male is superior in terms of quick twitch muscle, or athletic stamina, or melatonin endowment, or a far more copious testosterone production, or the (much feared by white man) reports of black erectile superiority, or his more instantaneous sexual arousal and response, I say beware of those statistics. Sure, some of them probably are accurate, but how can you get accurate reports when those white males do not come forward to participate in research? Are white women going to be impartial? Not according to Susan Crain Bakos. The Nimrod rumors are as old as the world.
Do black men want this sort of idolization? Whites first persecute and abuse and oppress, then their wives and daughters want to put the black man on a pedestal of socalled Krishna superiority, and worship him as the supreme lover, Negro god of procreation, mighty "Jupiter" lover, etc. Or just a sexy role model - a feast for the eyes. I guess its better than the old "lynch" mentality, accusing Black Man of "raping" a white woman who in most cases was the one flaunting her wares, doing everything in her power to turn heads, then squealing rape. Consider the "The Scottsboro Boys" case, or Emmett Till, the teenaged black kid who winked, or "whistled" at a white woman.
Ida B. Wells devoted her life to combatting this American holocaust, in which `gracious` southern Belles played Potiphar's wife to the Black Man as Joseph. For more on this famous crusader for justice (Ida Wells Barnett).
I do not think there is necesarily any inherent superiority in the Black Male physically, despite the pictures, the testimonials. The superiority is psychological, not physical. But it is the psychological side which creates the physical (and sexual) superiority. I admit there are many white women who become numbed, or disgruntled, over the "failings" and limitations of white husbands. However, many of those cases where the white woman begins singing the praises of Black love are hardly the most reliable sources. They have been wounded by the white man, so how can they be impartial?
The white man, not all of them, but many, are all too sadly characteristic of what Santayana said about the modern worker, ever busy as a bee, but incapable of emotional maturity, "sexually atrophied" and essentially dedicated to the most meaningless and superficial obsessions of materialism and self-complacency.
What can we learn anecdotally? We all know the reports. White men are good materialists. Many of them are detail oriented. They make good technocrats, computer nerds, accountants. But some white men are just better with their head than with their heart. They do not know how to love a woman emotionally, with their whole being. And women sometimes have a craving for that kind of love --- from the heart.
Let us not knock the white man's role. The world owes so much to white men,who have been the greatest materialists and Mammon-olaters. But on the domestic scene, have some respect. Whether white woman feels she needs more than her husband's "superficial" love, that is not really something that can be measured with a yardstick. See. Black Man was raised different. Blacks, at least rural Blacks, tend to come from stronger family structures, at least the rural ones. Whites often come from pampered permissive backgrounds. Lots of things, lots of toys, but often absentee parents, inadequate discipline, not enough love.
Do I support cross-cultural liasons? Yes, I do. I don't think we can fight it. In the fulness of time, it is God that puts love in these white chicks hearts. It is God that makes a Black Man willing to open their heart to a white girl, and have compassion on her. Malcolm X opposed mixed or cross-cultural sex, and had little patience for white woman, whom he called the ultimate Delilah, the total slut, temptress, seducer (and many similar such phrases from the Bible, or the streets).
Some black preachers have also sought to discourage cross-cultural relationships, pointing out how Solomon was led astray by his wives. Some Blacks attain "success" and, after marrying a white woman, come under the influence of her family and friends, and wind up forgetting their own roots, and heritage, and the struggles of their people. This even happens with whites. Consider Ronald Reagan, a staunch New Deal Democrat, liberal, pro-union and pro-FDR. Through talent and hard work, he escapes poverty. But coming under the influence of Nancy's father, he forgets his humble roots, is lured into conservatism. How many Blacks have undergone similar transformations (not necessarily for the better). I mention Alan Keyes, Clarence Thomas, Ward Connerly. The list grows ever longer, and longer. The gifted and talented tenth turn rich, forget their roots, and bam! You got OREO. And now, apparently Kobe Bryant is headed down the primrose path, as well.
On the other hand, intermarriage between diverse groups seems an American tradition. I am not sure we can fight it. There are some Black Men who (no less than others) simply need more than one outlet for their drives. I do not excuse or condone the sins of history's Kings and Sultans and Sheiks. It may be genetic. Women have always been attracted to power. Without even realizing it, they crave the DNA that superior males carry inside their sperm. So they have become "groupees" of Men of a certain Image.
In olden times it was the Sultans and Lords and Mighty Men, the Nimrods of the land. Now it is the boxers, the sports stars and athletes, the college heroes and music phenoms. Plus there seems to be the "bad boy" image. The phenomenon seems to be a perrenial one. Almost five hundred years ago, George Chapman, the great English (white) dramatist, poet, and translator of Homer and others once acknowledged that -- black man is a pearl in all women's eyes.
I dont think anyone really knows why. Franz Fanon remarked on it, with bitter homor. Eldridge Cleaver made some guesses, with more compassion. Merle Lockwood notes: "The intertwining of sexism and racism has created such stereotypes as the impotent white man, the virile black man, the sacred white woman." Much of what he says had been explored in greater depth by Calvin C. Hernton, or how 'bout the novels of Chester Himes.
I also think there has to be something to it, but I'm not sure just what. One possible reason black men are more likely to be "real" emotionally, they put everything into it. White men are more likely to have the social cover-up of brain smarts, but Black Men have heart smarts. The modern English poet Eliot described many white men when he said they have "headpeices filled with straw."
Another possible reason black men are more mature emotionally is that many of them have known the harsh side of life, the rejection of elitism, being excluded from the pampered and privileged life of white society. For white man, it's a late wake up call to learn that all your privilege, all your advantages, your suburbs, your college, your toys ... none of it prepared you for making a woman happen. There's no book that tells you how. No fancy college class that shows you. Obviously, some Black Men lack emotional IQ, too. But why is low emotional IQ and general emotional immaturity almost epidemic among white males?
White women simply have to learn that these urges and fantasies are natural. White husbands need to accept that their wives have normal needs for a deeper kind of emotional fulfillment. It is nothing personal. Get help for your "white boy" inferiority complex. You are not going to satisfy her by aping a Black Man. Accept who you are. And perhaps you should even encourage her to spread her wings a little, and flirt a bit with Black Males she day dreams about.
Honestly loving a Black Man, or any real Man whatever his race or hue, is probably one of the most wholesome parts of the white female psyche. She is not the "ice princess" of archetypal vision, any more than Black Man is some primordial god-like Nimrod, to be worshipped throughout the age. Mass media, alas, gives in to much ot this portrayal. Not just television but there are a number of motion pictures you might look at.
Certainly IR is more wholesome than the horrendous statistics of white males who commit child abuse, the white males who spend millions on pronography, are hooked on masturbation but can't satisfy their wife, can't give up their voyeurism, cybersex, and peeping tom mentality.
The fact is, the white man is never going to change himself into a Black Man simply by mimicking his likes and dislikes, interests and disinterests, his music, dress, or walk. White man has to accept who he is. There are of course some things he can learn, such as the emotional integrity that white females love so much about the Black Man.
White chicks have complained that their hubby is made of ice, that he is shallow, that he tries to love from his head, or his pocketbook, rather from his heart. Learn from Black Man, you can't buy love. Start just being who you are, whatever level of honesty and emotion and heart that you have.
If you can do that, you won't have to be jealous of a "REAL" man who has got authentic love, emitted straight out of his heart and soul. It will be your first step to growing up.
Please white hubbies who read this: Accept that your wife has needs. You do not own her.
let us be glaad and rejoice in it. |
Colleen Devlin |
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Taboos - ??? and the hypocrisy of patriarchy When Jesus challenged the powers of his day, he ran up against the pride, the presumptions, and the outright prejudices of the religious and social authorities. Their reaction was to see him as a threat, all the more so the more his popularity increased with common folk, sinners and unlearned. Eager to entrap this revolutionary, this upstart, they came to him whith --- what else --- a "bad" woman. What better a scapegoat than the one men always finger? Interracial porn: beneficial or detrimental? humor Let's Mix It Up kysabraswell.com |