So

Having beat up on Jake for a while, we turn our attention back to Adamu, who is being referred to consistantly as "Big Adam". This is, according to Big Bobby, a convention used among hockey players.

Dear Big Adam!

Haven't heard from you for a few days, and I was wondering how you were doing. Marg says the lawyer sent her a message, asking for money (which is pretty typical for a lawyer if you ask me).

Did you get my email about the THL? Pretty sweet, eh? If you can get some people on your end to commit to this, I'll be able to send you more than enough money for startup costs.

Anyway, write me back and tell me what you think, eh?

Yours,

Big Bobby
The setup for the Tropical Hockey League: For every player Big Adam can recruit, Big Bobby will send him $9,000 for equipment and training.
No fool he, Adamu soon drops his usual "millions in a bank account" fraud and immediately signs on with this ground floor opportunity, albeit in a typical scammer way.

Big Adam and Bobby exchange email

Can't help but wonder just how much money there is to be made selling spell-checking software in West Africa...

Perhaps it is immature of us to want the scammers to pose for stupid pictures.

Okay, it is immature...

However, the idea of this guy running around, trying to get his friends to sit for a picture, wearing bowls, is just to good to pass up. And besides, while he's busy doing that, hopefully he isn't spending his time scamming people.

This was written in early October, if memory serves.

How's it going, big Adam?

"concerening the lawyer that is the fee for an (affidavice of oath from
the ministry of justice) for the preparations of the change of
ownership of the lodgement/deposite receipt of the fund, according to
him it is not his lawyer's charge for services. so please try to
expedict co-operation with the lawyer by paying hime the fee as
requested of for the onward moving of the transfer soonest possible."

I thought Marg was going to take care of paying the lawyer. I had
better check with her on that, or I'm going to look like a big hoser, eh?

"Am having an arrengement with two able and fisical fit men/ adult in
status for that purpose(THL) but it all about my incapabily of finance
for recriuting and holding a get together for them on that purpose. I
wish you could have offer a helping hand regards to that by sending down
to me any little sum for my running arounds on the both transaction for
us to achieve a sucess, goal."

Well, I think I can help you out here. My backers were thrilled to hear
I had a reliable contact in West Africa. As a show of good faith, they
want a photograph of the players we have recruited for the THL.

Here is what you need to do: get as many men as you can to pose for a
team picture. It doesn't matter if they are going to be on the team or
not, since you will be paid by the number of recruits. Because of the
extra recruits, you will be able to receive more money to cover your
travelling expenses and equipment purchases.

Now, this part is vitally important. Normally we would have the team
members wearing their hockey gear. Since you probably don't have any,
we will have to make do with other items. I think you could substitute
brooms for the regular hockey sticks, and any sort of helmet would do -
motorcycle helmet, military, construction hard hat. If you can't find
anything like that, use your imagination and try a bucket or a bowl.
Third, think of a team name and write it on a sign to be included with
the team photo. Try something like the "Abidjan Lions" or the "Abidjan
Eagles" if you can't think of anything.

"Please if you wish to send me any money do so through western union
money transfer with this name; (MANASSEH IFEANYI IKONNE ABIDJAN COTE D'
IVOIRE) for easy identification and collection of such money."

I don't know if I can get out to the Western Union office that easily.
The snow has finally started (a little late this year) and it is tough
to get the sled out to that side of town. It would be easier if I send
it by DHL, since their office is close to my home. They have an office
in Abidjan, so I will have to send it that way instead.

Once I have the photo from you, I should be able to get payment in one
or two business days, and then shipped by next-day courier to you.

"how is Marg, hope she is ok. extend my regards"

As far as I know she's fine. Today's Thursday, so she's probably off to
the pogey office.

Yours,

Big Bobby

And just to make sure that Marg isn't left out, Adamu sends this:

Dear mummy, Marg, how is over there ? hope no qualms. I has been very busy with the assignment/proposal request from the big bobby. how far have all gone with the attorney/lawyer, have you finalized with him ?; what' s the present possitions of things now ? please try to be in constant contact and co-operation with him and also get me aquinted with the developments. waiting to hear from Thanks.
Adamu Idris.

To which Marg replies:

Dear Adam,

Yeah, everything's fine here but I'm not very happy with your lawyer. I asked him a few days ago to let me know how much the ministry fee would be in Canadian dollars and he still hasn't! I'm sorry this is taking so long Adam! I'd like to hurry it up and I'm sure you're anxious to get your money out and get here to Canada!

I'm glad to hear that you're busy with the proposal from Big Bobby! That's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know! He probably didn't tell you this but his investors are the same ones that financed the Jamaican Bobsled team eh? And look how rich and famous they got even though they were crappy sledders!! I attached a photo of those nice boys for you. Don't they look handsome in their genuine made-in-Canada toques??

I hope it doesn't take you too long to get some boys together or you might miss out! Bobby didn't tell you this cause he didn't want to worry you but he said that his competitor Don Cherry is getting together some boys from Nigeria or somewhere like that and is going to try to beat him to the investors money.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Your friend,
Marg

Toque: A knitted woolen hat worn in winter.

Don Cherry - a loud-mouthed Canadian hockey commentator, who wears suits that look like the upholstery from Grandma's couch.

The THL counter-scam heats up

This surprised me - don't get too many requests for items, I guess because they are slower to arrive and possibly exposes the scammer to more risk.

The Abidjan Babes?! What the hell kind of hockey team is that? Might as well call them the Elderlies, or the Pulled Groins or something.

Gosh, could this be one and the same person as The Big Adamu?
dear big Bobby,
I receive your mail and the contents which is what am busy into as of now and will get you posted on a possitive development as per my recriutments soonest upon hearing your own possitive responds.

but all I need vitally is that financial assistance which is the most vital part of the recriutment outings ,

(1) The poseses of this players are being organized/ taken with money , which is likely be footed by me as the team head .

(2) calling the players together also cost me money in hosting them for address and a kind of GET -TOGETHER PARTY/ FORUM ..

(3) I also need a personal phone for easy and constant communication with/ to you on developments because of the nature of the arena where am hanging a stay, which is not at all convinent for my compositions reagrds to this very proposal/ project. Since I dont have any.

That is the reason why your urgent financial aiding is very very necessary to me for us to achieve our aims quickly and sucessfully.

Meanwhile am on a serious organizing and campigne of more players but only need that financial surpport from you to back up every of my meetings/ confrontations with any player.
I surggest that the team name will be ABIDJAN BABES , How do see the name ? confirm .

concerening the asspect of sending money,
NOTE/ DO NOT SEND ME MONEY THROUGH THE COURRIER SERVICE TO AVOID LOST OR TAMPER RATHER MAKE OUT A CHANGE AND GO TO THE WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER OFFICE AND SEND ANY MONEY THROUGH THE NAME I HAVE GIVEN TO YOU ?
Once again this is the name you will use in sending any money to me (MANASSEH IFEANYI IKONNE , ABIDJAN COTE D' IVOIRE)
and send the control nos. and every particulars to facilitae my easy collection of such money to this purpose .
I earnestly awaits your quick , possitive complaince through the western union money transfer.
to help me in getting you posted soonest.
Thanks your's,
Adamu Idris.

Can I please see page 3 now?

Hoser! Take me back to the menu!