• There's nothing but snow, miles and miles of glistening snow.
• Canadians are very polite.

And... and that's about it.  We can add in the occasional Mountie, beaver, or hockey player, but for the most part nobody gives Canada much thought.  Probably when you are a scammer sitting in a cyber-cafe somewhere in West Africa, all you want to know is whether or not Canadians are gullible enough to send money.

The beginning is a little jumpy thanks to a computer crash that wiped out about a month and a half of successful baiting.  Just to bring you up to speed, here are the dramatis personae -

The Original Players:

Marg Delahunty, Warrior Princess - played by Sister Mary Catherine

Big Bobby Clobber - played by Badger

Adamu Idris ("Big Adam") - a scammer

Jacob Oahns ("Jake") - a scammer, probably Adamu in another guise

And when things with Big Adam started to falter, we tossed out the hook again, and caught:

Freddy Flora - a scammer

Ahmed "Nappin" Mitose - a minor scammer, and a friend of Freddy's

Dr. Scapoli - a scammer, and almost certainly Freddy

John Douglas - a scammer

This whole bait lasted almost 6 months in total. Between two baiters, and six scammers, that's a lot of email.  Luckily (?), the computer crash took out a lot of the early correspondence, so we'll just be hitting the highlights and filling in the gaps.

So, here is Adamu Idris.  Well, he claims his name is Adamu Idris.  And, he claims this is his picture.  He is lying on both counts. We've lost the original message he sent us, but that's not really important since you've probably read some of the other baits here and know the score.  Blah, blah, millions in a bank account...

Soon after getting positive responses from both Marg and Big Bobby, Adamu introduces us to his lawyer - Jacob Oahns

Jake responds soon enough with a form for us to fill out.  Bloody lawyers and their bloody paperwork...  So, both Big Bobby and Marg respond.  (Bobby does the added favour of saving it as a big fat 1 Mb bitmap file, and sending it four times).

Hey Jacob, I'm sending you the form you asked me to fill out and I guess you have  the banking information from Big Bobby so now we're ready to go right?  Anything else you need to make this transaction a go?? I hope we can  do this quickly because it's damn cold in Canada right now and I'm about  to hibernate!! I have to keep busy to keep from tipping over and that  extra money is going to really help my investment scheme! Also I know  Adam is pretty anxious to move here before the airports are closed for  the winter! Don't tell him I said so but I think maybe he's sweet on  me!! He's single you know and so am I. Can you tell me if he's good  looking??? I'd really like to know before he comes!! Thanks! Marg Delahunty

	And to let you in on some of the inside jokes, 24 Sussex Drive is the official residence of Canada's Prime Minister. Marg Delahunty is another matter altogether.  A character from "This Hour Has 22 Minutes", she frequently confronts government ministers to harangue them about how they should be doing their jobs. Go to http://www.22minutes.com for more information.
Meanwhile, from Big Bobby Dear Mr. Ohans: I just got back from using Tim's scanner, so your form is attached.  That man has every computer gadget known, and he makes a great cup of  coffee. Robert Clobber   Dear Mr. Ohans: Sorry, I tried to send your form, but my computer said there was an  error sending it. So, I'll try again. Let me know if you receive it. Feel free to call me, eh? I should be  in all day (206-338-2673). Robert Clobber And again, the same day... Dear Mr. Ohans: Still having problems with my email. I'm going to try sending your  form one last time - let me know if you receive it. Robert Clobber The next day, Jake sends a message saying he couldn't open the attached document, so Big Bobby thoughtfully sends the 1 Mb document again. "THIS IS TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE RECEIPT OF YOUR MAILS IN A RESPOND TO OUR FORM, BUT TRY TO RESEND THE FORM DIRECT BECAUSE WE COULD NOT BE ABLE TO ACCESS THE YOUR ATTACHMENT FISIBLELY." Well, we'll try it again, then. If you don't receive this one, let me know as soon as possible. "THANKS FOR YOU ANTISPETIC CO-OPERATIONS." We Canadians are well-known for being co-operative. Yours, Robert Clobber	("Tim" in this case is Tim Horton - a former hockey player who went on to start up an incredibly successful chain of outlets selling coffee and doughnuts throughout Canada)
	And yes, Big Bobby's form is far less aesthetic than Marg's, as is his handwriting, as is Big Bobby himself if we really want to get down to it. Big Bobby Clobber, a creation of Canadian comic Dave Proudfoot, is noted for being the primary reason for the introduction of the mandatory helmet rules in hockey. I really wanted to use more of Big Bobby's famous quotes, but at least I worked in the Tropical Hockey League.

The assault on Jake continues, as Marg sends her passport.

Dear Jacob, Here I see that you need a copy of my passport, I have attached it.  Also, I believe that Bobby Clobber already sent you the full bank  particulars so you should have that on file already right? So you need 820.00 (EURO) for some fee. Can I just send you a cheque in  Canadian dollars? Let me know about that eh? Cause I'm not too sure  what the conversion rate is for that dang Euro! Marg Delahunty

And thanks to Homer J. Fong for his fine passport work.

ATTN, M/S MARGDELA & CO. THIS IS TO INFORM YOU TO WRITE OUT AND SEND TO THIS CHAMBER THE ACCURATE PASSPORT NUMBERS AS IT COULD NOT BE VISIBLE IN THE ATTACHMENT COPY . ALL THAT IS NEEDED FROM YOU THERE IS THE EXCERT NAME IN THE PASSPORT AND THE PASSPORT NUMBERS . FOR A PLACEMENT ON THE PREPARATION PROCESS OF THE DOCUMENTS OF YOUR BENEFICIARYSHIP. ALONG SIDE WITH THE FEE AS HAVE BEEN INDICATED TO YOU IN OUR LAST TO YOU VIA WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER TO ENABLE US HESTEN UP AND OFFER YOU THE MOST LEGAL SOLICTS. WE THANK YOU FOR YOUR SINCERE CO-OPERATION TO ENABLE US SERVE YOU BETTER. HON. J.C. OHANENYE ESQ.

Sorry that you couldn't see the numbers on my passport. My scanners kinda crappy cause I got it at Zellers with my club Zed points eh? I shop there cause I hate that that friggin' Stuf-Mart! All the money goes south of the border you know! The numbers are <<557<<485<<122<<701>>2G91NZ9D30Z0QLZ<<< <<DELAHUNTY<<MARG<<<<<< And as for your fee, I'm happy to pay it cause I just collected my pogy cheque today and I'm rollin in it!! But you never told me how much it is in Canadian dollars, I've been waiting for that! I asked at the Bank of Nova Scotia and they said they can't make change for Euros cause those are no stinkin' good here. Please just let me know how much in Canadian dollars and I'll get it sent right away!! Marg Delahunty

Zellers: a low-end department store, found throughout Canada   Pogy/pogey: government unemployment insurance, supposedly frequently abused by those living in the Maritime regions of Canada's east cost.

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