Welcome to the updated Alt-Gor Pages
i decided it was about time that i updated the Alt-Gor pages since it has looked the same for a while with the same content. i have plans of adding some new content while updating some of the old content. If Y/you happen to have some spare time on Y/your hands and have something to suggest or add drop me a line.
Safety...From Online to Offline
Safety must be your number one priority. Think of all the people who would be saddened, hurt, and affected emotionally and/or financially if you were physically injured, hospitalized, or worse, killed.
When you finally find someone online that interests you enough to want to arrange a real-time meeting, that is the time to focus your thinking on your safety. The first bit of advice I have to offer concerning safety, is to never give out any personal information. Do not give your full name (first name is okay). Do not give out your phone number (so much personal information can be retrieved online from a simple phone number). Do not give out your driver's license number or your address. Some would even say, "Be vague about where you live. Only list your state or county in an online-dating-site profile". Do not give out the make and model of your car either.
Always, before setting up the first meeting, make sure you have a safe call. Your safe call should be someone, a close friend or family member that knows about your lifestyle choices and understand the dangers that can be involved. The person who is, or can be, your safety line in case of a problem. Someone who you consider responsible and will take this task seriously. Your safe-call person will need to know: where you are going to meet your online-interest; who they are and the approximate duration of your meeting. It an excellent idea if your safe-call person phones you about 30 minutes after the arranged meeting time (since you will have a cell phone) and then in 45-minute intervals until the meeting is over and you are safely home. Make sure you are in contact with your safe-call person when the "date" is over, in your car, and driving out of the parking area. These are very vulnerable moments, so stay alert!
There are coded messages that can be used while on the phone with your safe call. Ways to let them know if the meeting is going well or if you feel uncomfortable or that your life is in danger. The code should be everyday phrases that you promise not to use unless needed.
Just to give you a point of reference, make the messages sound like something you would normally say so you don't reveal that you are alerting someone that your life is in danger. Some suggested messages to let the safe call know that you feel uncomfortable with the "date" could be:
- "i left the coffee pot on"
- "i think i left the living room window open"
(or phrases to that effect). Of course, you will want to be a little more original.
It is also a very good idea to have a safety phrase if you need police intervention or assistance. Maybe even a special phrase to let your safe-call know everything is going well and you are happy.
When you arrange to meet someone from online, make sure the meeting takes place somewhere familiar to you. Somewhere you know the floor plan and would be able to sneak out if you are feeling so uncomfortable that there is no other way to end it. The location should also be well-lit, public, and preferably have surveillance cameras (at least in the parking area). Arrange to arrive early and park where your vehicle cannot be seen from the meeting place, but in the safest place you can choose. Or take a cab (if available in your area). You could even drive to another location, park your car and then take a cab a short distance to your meeting place. If you drive to the meeting place make sure you are not followed back to your car by the online interest.
"Playing" on the first meeting is also not smart. You do not know them well enough, nor do they know you well enough, to be able to play safely. It does not matter how desperate or confident you are, it is just not smart. Before the first meeting is over, if it went well enough, you can make a second date. Do not make the second date for the next day. Optimally, it should be at least 5 days later, to give you time to talk with them more, either on the phone or online.
Once the first meeting is over, do not allow them to follow you home. If you fear that you are being followed in your car, do not lead them back to your place. Please go to the nearest police station (you should have this mapped out in advance).
It is not unheard of for a sub/slave to take a friend with them to that first meeting (I have done that before and the Dom did not object at all). Someone that knows you and can well read you, when you are feeling uneasy, would be an asset. Not only to be there to in case of a problem, but also to help you feel more relaxed. You can also get you friend's opinion on the Dom/Master if you are uncertain about your own instincts.
Another thing that I personally have done, and have heard of others doing, is to either get a photocopy of their driver's license or call that info into your safe call when you meet. Or, yet another option is to use your cell phone to either text or email the driver's license information to your safe call. A written record to be referred to in case there is a problem is important.
Whew! That was a lot of negative stuff to think about. But I am hoping that it will show you some ways around the scary stuff involved with meeting "strangers". It is not to be taken lightly. You matter. Your safety and well-being matters. Not just to you and your immediate family, but to all your online friends who might never know just what happened to you. It's really something to think about!
Planned Update
i would like to create a gallery of images of the members of O/our home on Alt. If Y/you would like Y/your image and a few lines about Y/yourself to appear on this site (maybe Y/you are looking for Y/your O/one or Y/you have already found Y/your O/one and would like to show 'em off to the O/other) just slip me an e-mail and i will add it. Risque or nilla, it's all the same to me.
