Make a decision with your spouse to sit down and review
this list of practical ideas for making your
marriage great. Add anything
that you think will work for you both that I have omitted.
2. Keep in touch. Check in on each other during
the day. Even it you happen to work in the same building, it is always
nice to get a text or email saying 'You are still as beautiful as
ever,' or 'You still give me butterflies.' Sometimes it is nice
to know that your wife or husband is thinking about you.
3. Do the unexpected. Surprise your spouse with
flowers, a gift, or a night out on the town with no alternative agenda and
expecting nothing in return. Planning something special is an excellent
way to infuse romance into your relationship. Sometimes even the smallest
surprises can feel like the biggest.
4. Talk about your personal goals. Sit down
together and talk about what you want out of life, what you want o achieve
as a couple and personally. Write these down. Review them and modify them
every few months. This makes you aware of what your spouse wants and their
goals.
5. Develop and nurture friendships. Have
friendships outside of each other. Do not become an exclusive couple that
never do anything with anyone else! We all need friendships to develop and
grow us.
6. Do not criticise. Do not put down or
criticise your spouse in front of other people. Instead, decide that you
will both commit to build up and support each other when talking to other
people.
7. Keep yourself in good physical shape. This
may not seem important to you, but I am sure it is important to your
spouse! Keeping yourself healthy not only will decrease the risks of
diabetes and heart problems, but also help to keep the attraction alive
between both of you. You do not have to spend alot on a gym membership,
you can go walking or jogging together each evening.
8. Plan weekend getaways. At least once a year
plan to go away for a weekend. Team up with another married couple and
they can babysit your children while you are away and then you can return
the favor. It does not have to be an expensive weekend but it is vital
that you get this time alone to spend with each other.
9. Do not let the sun go down on your anger.
NEVER go to bed harboring offence or hurt with your spouse that you have
not already discussed. If you were disappointed, hurt or upset with their
behaviour, discuss it. Do not enter into an argument but talk openly about
what it was that bothered you and why.
10. Be quick to forgive and quick to say sorry.
Bitterness and offence is like cancer. If left alone it gradually keeps
growing and growing until it takes over. Do not let bitterness or offence
at your spouse take over the
love you once had. Talk things through. If
you need to seek outside help like counselling, do so.
11. Compliment your spouse. Take time to notice
everyday things that your spouse does like preparing a meal, cleaning the
house, doing the shopping. This shows your spouse that you appreciate them
and the things that they do and you do not take for granted the effort
they put into it.
12. Be there. Sometimes all your spouse needs is
someone to be there, not to shout, order or demand, but to love and
support. If they are having a difficult day, respect that and give them
space if needed.
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